True Blood Season Finale Leaves Us With 10 Mostly Rhetorical Questions


Eric kills Russell in the True Blood season finale

I’m not the only one who had nightmares and delicious dreams about True Blood all night, right? Season five’s finale was intense. And it totally put to rest our doubts that Alan Ball and company could wrap up all of those crazy plots in one hour. Still, it also left my brain churning with all sorts of questions about what will happen in season six. Departing exec producer Ball answered a bunch of those questions over at last night, and HBO Go has a whole bonus scene that hints at a bit more, but it wouldn’t be True Blood if we could predict everything that’s coming up for Sookie, Eric, Jason and the rest. Here are 10 (mostly rhetorical) queries that kept me up for most of the night.

1. Could Eric get any hotter?
My heart stopped when he swooped in to save Sookie and the fairies from Russell — even though, in typical Eric fashion, he labeled it revenge for his family’s murder more than a heroic deed. He and Nora could have skipped town after that, but his better self drove him to venture back into the Authority to save the day. Swoon.

Jason and Eric on True Blood
2. Also, are we done with serious Eric and back to more of his playful side?
His interactions with Jason reminded us of why we fell for the dangerous vamp back when he was mostly a villain. Leave the dreary stuff for other vamps!

Nora and Eric on True Blood
3. OK, last Eric question, we promise: Will there be an Eric-Sookie-Nora love triangle?
Now that she’s done with the religious zealoutry, Nora has some pretty fun chemistry with her “brother.” And yet Eric was so tender and protective of Sookie in the last minutes of the episode, I can’t tell who’s best suited for him. This outta be good!

Jason on True Blood
4. Is Jason going to be OK?
It looks like that bump on his head has led him straight back to his season two, vampire-hating ways, which should be entertaining, but we’re a bit worried that hallucinating his parents’ constant presence might indicate he’s not all there — I mean, less than usual. But if we get more classic Jason lines like, “That train has already sailed,” I’m in for the ride.

Luna on True Blood
5. Is Luna going to be OK?
It’s still not clear whether skin-walking is what killed Sam’s brother, so maybe Luna puking blood and passing out after shifting to Reverend Newlin doesn’t necessarily mean she’s done for.

Tara and Pam on True Blood
6. Will Tara and Pam really be an item?
The sexual tension between Tara and her reluctant maker has been building all season, but I still didn’t see their prison-break makeout sesh coming. I expect hilarious antics to ensue as they attempt to go on actual dates together without tearing each other’s throats out.

Andy on True Blood
7. How on Earth is Andy Bellefleur going to raise four half-fairy girls on his own?
We certainly hope he makes nice with Holly again to get a bit of help.

Alcide on True Blood
8. Could Alcide be any hotter?
I cheered when Alcide agreed to his dad’s plan to put his “just-say-no-to-V” morals on hold for a minute to save the pack and beat that horrible J.D. at his own game. And then his voice got all throaty and authoritative as he made that noble speech about not sinking into nihilism. Do you think all those redneck wolves know what “nihilism” means?

Salome on True Blood
9. Is the True Blood hair and makeup team burnt out after all those deaths?
It must take a lot of work to make vampires go all melty before they explode in a pile of goo — and the death toll was particularly high last night. That must be why they slacked a bit when it came to the regular stuff, like making Salome not look like she was wearing a hairpiece or matching the color of Bill’s face to his neck. We forgive you, guys.

Bill on True Blood
10. Holy crap, what happened to Bill?
We are definitely not going to find this out for a while. And all signs point to a supremely scary season six. For now, let’s just be grateful that it won’t be a Stephen Moyer-free season!

Sweet Lilith, do we really have to wait until next summer for all this? Share your agony, and your own burning, rhetorical questions in the comments below!

[Photos: HBO]

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