We knew this day would come. We just didn’t know it would be so soon. Variety announced today that MTV has decided to pull the plug on Jersey Shore after the show’s upcoming sixth season. Honestly, we applaud their restraint. It would have been way too easy to keep on trucking down the Jersey Turnpike until Snooki‘s baby started having babies. Better to go out on top, we say. The top being a massively pregnant Snooki shoving The Situation into the hot tub, of course. Besides, there are already so many things we’ll miss after JS is off the air, and we’d like to be able to haul ourselves off the bathroom floor after two, maybe three days of hysterical crying at the most. Things like:
1. The Duck Phone: Our first, our last, our everything, the shore house duck phone drew us in immediately.
2. Hot Tubbin’: The show has experienced a significant drop off in hot tub-related activities during the past few seasons, but we’ll miss seeing everyone stewing like a sexy orange gumbo nonetheless. On a related note, this clip is from Season 1, Episode 1! Before everyone knew Snooki was there real star! Oh, were we ever so young?
3. Ron Ron Juice: Forget the smoosh room. Jersey Shore gave us a new fluid! At least now we walk away knowing not to drink Ron Ron Juice…unless we want to have a great time! Oh, and spent our Saturday scrubbing red food coloring out of the carpet.
4. GTL: People went tanning, worked out at the gym and washed laundry before Jersey Shore. They will after. But we’ll remember. Same with announcing the arrival of cabs.
5. The Pranks!: From swapping the outside furniture for the inside furniture, to letting JWoww‘s dogs poop all over the house (Good one, Sitch!), we look back fondly at the plethora of wacky highjinks the gang unleashed on each other. Hey, remember when someone flushed their underwear down the toilet, which was subsequently clogged for months while everyone refused to address it? Haha! Good times.
6. The Jersey Turnpike: Ed Helms knows what we’re talking about!
7. Lola: In Season Five, Snooki started channeling a make-up smeared rabbit costume alter ego. She has to at least make a cameo during the last season. Please?
8. Dem abs: Dem. Abs.
Of course, there are a few things that definitely will not have us missing the show:
1. Sammi and Ronnie fighting: We’re still haunted by memories Sam and Ron’s tragic season-long fight. Her glasses!
2. The Unit: The Situation’s best friend? More like The Situation’s messed friend. Seriously, that guy had a lot of problems. The first one being his personality.
3. Snooki’s…”Shore Shower”: We’re not even putting an image for this one. Never again.
4. Everyone ragging on Deena non-stop: They really go after her, of all people! Leave Deena alone!