Oh Adam Levine. Poor, sweet, naive Adam Levine. Clearly we do not agree with his sentiments that Honey Boo Boo a.k.a. Alana Thompson is “the decay of Western Civilization,” but more importantly, we wonder where he’s been lately? “Seriously, Honey Boo Boo is the decay of Western civilization. Just because so many people watch the show doesn’t mean it’s good,” the Maroon 5 singer told GQ. “So many people witness atrocities and can’t take their eyes away from them, but that doesn’t mean they’re good. That show is literally The. Worst. Thing. That’s. Ever. Happened.” Oh sweet boy. Are he kidding? Here Comes Honey Boo Boo isn’t even the worst thing we watched on TV today! If Adam genuinely thinks Honey Boo Boo is a harbinger of our society’s demise, then where were his sharp observational skills when we first heard about….*
1) Toddlers & Tiaras?
If Adam thinks Honey Boo Boo is bad, why doesn’t he think Toddlers & Tiaras a thousand times more savage? Not only is it the vehicle through which Honey Boo Boo entered Western civilization, it’s features dozens of different kinds of Honey Boo Boos rolled into one show! Why single out Alana when her family seems genuinely sweet and easy-going? [Photo: TLC]
2) Dance Moms?
See above. [Photo: Lifetime]
3) Amish Mafia?
It’s an upcoming Discovery reality show about the people who allegedly act as enforcers for the deeply pacifist Amish community. Your argument is invalid, Levine. [Photo: Discovery Channel]
4) Waterworld…the show?
With a $175 million budget and $88 million U.S. box office, 1995’s Waterworld is generally considered to be the biggest box office flops of the past twenty years. So no, decades later, Syfy is thinking of making it into a TV show. Because we have literally no new ideas left. [Photo: Universal Pictures]
5) Courtney Stodden’s dog Dourtney? We don’t mean Courtney Stodden. We don’t mean Courtney and her hubbie Doug. We mean the single fact that back in August Courtney blended her name with Doug and named her birthday puppy after their eternal union. Check yourself before you wreck yourself, Adam. We’ll go toe-to-toe with you defending our favorite parts of pop culture all night long if we have to…
*Just to be clear…we have, do or will totally love all of these things. We need to watch something while civilization rushes towards it’s demise!
[Photo: Getty Images]