Awards Season 2013 kicked off tonight with the People’s Choice Awards on CBS, and while we didn’t get any nip slips or f-bombs or other kind of flubs, host Kaley Cuoco and a cavalcade of stars kept it moving with some solid banter. From Ellen DeGeneres‘ Mayan prediction to Chris Colfer‘s fanfic shout-out, our favorite gems (other than Sandra Bullock‘s tear-jerking Favorite Humanitarian Award’s speech; we’re not going to try to recapture it) included…
1) Kaley Cuoco: “What can I do to find the action hero inside me?”
Katniss: “You can sell cheese from your goat.”
2) Kaley Cuoco: “I traded all my possessions for 2,000 cans of corn, so I’m ready to work!”
3) (Olivia Munn refused to give up Taylor Swift‘s People’s Choice award.)
Taylor Swift: “This always happens!”
Olivia Munn: “And it will always happen, Taylor. It’s your lot in life.”
4) Adam Levine: “Taylor Swift was super-charming…Damn you, Swift!”
5) Shemar Moore (about asking out Alicia Keys): “She looked me in the eye and said, ‘Listen, son, I appreciate your flirt game, but my man situation is handled.’”
6) Ellen DeGeneres: “It’s 2013, this is my thirteenth People’s Choice Award. It is exactly as the Mayans predicted. So far, they got one right.”
7) Ellen DeGeneres: “I’d like to thank everyone on my team: Melissa Etheridge, Jane Lynch, Wanda Sykes…”
8) Chris Colfer: “It just feels so good to be exploited in your fan fiction!”
9) Kaley Cuoco: “If your dog decides to have diarrhea behind the TV or all over the power cords, let’s keep that between you and your dog.”
10) Jennifer Aniston: “I love the people, I really do.”
11) Adam Sandler’s insane acceptance speech: “Favorite berry: Halle. Favorite apple: Fiona. Favorite watermelon: Steve. Favorite James Bond movie: Forrest Gump…Favorite way to fly: unicorn. Favorite tree: The Tree Stooges.”
12) Jennifer Lawrence, accepting her Favorite Movie Actress Award: “I wish this was like Mean Girls and I could break this up and throw it all out to you, because you’re responsible.”
13) Nathan Fillion: “For the people who voted for me, I agree.”
14) Robert Downey Jr.: “To receive love, you have to give it. So this is me giving love. (Extends arms in amazing silence.) All right, I’m ready to receive.”
15) Chris O’Donnell: “This is actually an accident. I have Clippers tickets? The building is next door, and I went in the wrong entrance and the stage manager grabbed me…so here are your nominees!”
[Photo: Getty Images]
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