House Of Cards Vs. Scandal: Which D.C. Show Is Your Drug Of Choice?

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After the coldest winter, Scandal returns tonight–hopefully with much more of Scott Foley in a towel. With a new season of House of Cards now available on Netflix and Homeland and Veep continually in the TV conversation, D.C.-centric shows are taking over our DVR. And we’re not exactly mad about that.

Whether it’s a chance to escape into a world of manipulation or live out your high school Model UN dreams, political plots and District-based drama have proven to be just as juicy as soaps set in fictional towns. Scandal is back after a nearly two-month hiatus, forced to reveal how it plans on handling Kerry Washington’s pregnancy. House of Cards Season 2 has been available for less than two weeks, and yet we totally understand if you couldn’t resist binging all 13 new episodes in one sitting. Veep returns on HBO this April and Homeland returns for a fourth season later this year, minus one character Jennifer Lawrence is very upset about.

Each show has its own tropes and memorable dialogue, but in terms of conflict, character traits and the overuse of cheesy patriotic terms, they’re very similar. (Don’t believe us? Try drinking whenever someone says “leader of the free world” on any of the four shows–and call us when you’ve sobered up). Use the gallery above as a guide to help keep your gladiators and your Jonads straight.

But which Washington-set drama is for you? Here are a few personality questions crafted to find out what should be put at the top of your Netflix queue. For example, what should you watch if you love wine? Trick question: all of them.

Spoilers to follow!

1. If you have some daddy issues…

Scandal Olivia Pope

Scandal Olivia Pope, Rowan Pope

Scandal

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2. If you’ve always wanted Kevin Spacey to look you in the eye…

House of Cards Frank Underwood

House of Cards

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3. If you frequently want to scream about your coworkers’ incompetence…

Veep's Selina Meyer

Veep

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