Posts By BobCastrone

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ICYMI: A Parody Of A Parody Of A Joke

Inspired by the lyrical genius of “My Humps”, world-famous fatherf**ker Peaches recorded her own version of the song last year and called it “My Dumps”. It would’ve gone down as a forgotten parody, but as we’re beginning to learn, “My Humps” is the gift that keeps on giving. Check out this video of Peaches Alanis Morrissett-ing her version of “My Dumps” and giving it the emotion it deserves. (vid via Perez):

For the original version of “My Dumps” click here. So who’s going to tackle “My Humps” next? Shania? Beyonce? Hootie? Who’s it gonna be?

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CAPTION THIS! The Princess of Punk

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Pink highlights? Check. Throwing up devil horns? Check. Pretty pretty pink princess dress and a song about how she really wants to be your girlfriend? Check and check. It’s official- Avril Lavigne is totally punk rock.

For more hardcore pics of the most badass chick ever, click here. Then leave your captions in the comments.

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ICYMI: Eye-Roll-Gate

Did Simon Cowell really roll his eyes when Idol contestant Chris Richardson sent his thoughts and prayers to the folks over at Virginia Tech last night? Idol’s executive producer says “no.” The video… well, I’ll let you make the call.

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“Everyone Is Gay,” And Other Outrageous Claims in Pop Music History

Nirvana.jpgWriting a song is hard. Not everything in the world can be as simple as “I’m hot cuz I’m fly, you ain’t cuz you’re not.” Sometimes musicians and songwriters have to come up with metaphors, antecdotes or quotable lines– all while keeping the beat and rhyming with the line before. It’s not always easy, which is why every so often we’re blessed with ridiculous lines like “there’s an old man sitting next to me, making love to his tonic & gin.” The folks over at Cracked have compiled a list of the 15 Most Outrageous Claims in Pop Music History. Crappy metaphors, ridiculous rap claims and straight up nonsense- it’s all there. Check it out now.

The list is great (I don’t think I ever noticed how stupid that Color Me Badd line is), but I’ll be honest: I’m a little surprised that Lil’ Kim’s claim that her vag comes in different flavors didn’t make the cut. Maybe next time.

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While You Were Texting Your Vote For You-Know-Who

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  • A laundry basket that was once owned by Paris Hilton has failed to attract any bids on eBay. Because at this point, everybody’s just plain sick of Paris’ dirty laundry.
  • Joe Pesci brandished a golf club and threatened Robbie Williams after one of Robbie’s friends accidentally blocked his driveway. It’s kind of nice to see the line between fantasy and reality is thin when it comes to Joe Pesci, isn’t it?
  • Dave Chappelle shattered The Laugh Factory’s endurace record by performing for six hours and seven minutes straight. And it’s believed he also shattered Michael Richards‘ record for number of n-words dropped.
  • The lead singer of Right Said Fred plans on running for Mayor of London. His “I’m Too Sexy For Fiscal Irresponsibility” campaign is expected to be a huge hit.
  • The next edition of Survivor will be filmed in China, making it the first reality TV show filmed entirely in the communist nation. And the first Survivor with 1.3 billion participants.

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VIDEO HITS ONE: Forget-This-Not

Their name- Tacks, The Boy Disaster- is interesting. Their video for “Forget-Me-Not” is even better. Just check it out now; I don’t think a description could do it justice (but just in case, know that my description would contain the words: gnomes, aliens, cartoons, trippy, hipsters and monsters. Not necessarily in that order).


Video via Stereogum, naturally.

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Perry Hilton is So Hot Right Now. So Hot.

perry.JPGPerry Hilton has nothing in common with Paris Hilton. Well, except for the same initials. And blonde hair. And I guess they both hang out at Hyde. And have corny catchphrases. And neither of them wear underwear. I guess. But beyond that, they’re as different as night and day. If you don’t believe me, just check out these two Perry Hilton videos from Funny or Die. The tabloids better get ready: there’s a brand new hot socialite in town.

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CAPTION THIS! The Naked Girl Next Door

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That’s really not saying much- Holly would also rather go naked than: pay rent, get a job, learn how to act, sleep with somebody her own age… the list goes on and on.

Your turn: leave your captions in the comments now! (pic via The Blemish)

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One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others

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Sanjaya
continues to exceed our wildest expectations. Not only is the subpar singer still contending for the American Idol crown despite… well, despite everything… but now, somehow, he’s apparently considered a sex symbol. By dudes. Why else would Maxim name him their Girl of the Day?

You’ve no one but the Devil’s lawyer to blame for this androgynous American Idol stowaway, who, despite being detested by the judges, somehow remains in the hunt for the show’s coveted prize as this year’s top 40 footnote. We stopped watching after the auditions (the only digestible part of the show), but it’s our understanding that we have Sanjina to thank for the “ponyhawk,” a hair-novation destined to tickle your underarm as you noogie hordes of copycat hipsters.

So now it’s settled: even if Sanjaya isn’t the next American Idol, at least we know he can be the next Taylor Hanson.

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ICYMI: Dr. Claude VonScheer Explains It All

Paul Scheer took a break from dominating MTV with The Human Giant (that show is f’ing genius) to hang out with The Post Show guys (read: me + 2 of my idiot friends) and report on a growing social epidemic: rape dates. Don’t let the fake mustache fool you- I swear it’s him. If you’re a straight guy who’s seen an entire episode of Grey’s Anatomy you may already be a victim…