Singer Davy Jones has passed away at only 66 years old today, from causes as yet unknown. Most people of a certain age remember Davy as the dreamiest member and lead singer of the 1960s Brit Pop band The Monkees.
Now I love The Monkees — though perhaps not as much as Marge Simpson. However when I hear Davy Jones, I can only think of one thing: His unforgettable cameo as Marcia Brady’s prom date on The Brady Bunch. Ah yes, every girl’s fantasy: To have their high school idol ask them out to prom. (Sadly, Bob Balaban never called.) Ah, that hair, those eyes… Marcia was a lucky girl. She probably still hasn’t washed her cheek from that day he kissed her.
We bring you two beloved clips from his appearance on The Brady Bunch below. Here’s to hoping we all see Davy on the flip side.
Ahead, Davy sings the song “Girl” and we all just spend the rest of the day swooning.
Yes, it’s that time of year again. The Oscars! Hosted by Billy Crystal! And after sorting through thousands of photos from last night’s affair, we bring you the best pics from backstage at the Oscars, the Vanity Fair Party, the 20th Annual Elton John AIDS Foundation Viewing Party, and all the other soirees neither of us were invited to. So please, sit back, block some time, and let’s take a glance at the Oscar Photos They Don’t Want You To See:
MOST LIKELY TO BE RIDDING HER BODY OF TERMITES
Jennifer Lopez and Maybe That Little Girl In The Back
“COMING UP NEXT! N***AS IN PARIS!”
Nina Dobrev and Ian Sommerholder
WOMAN ACHIEVES THE RARE “DOUBLE JOLIE”
IT’S AS IF ALL OUR MOMS MET ADAM LAMBERT LAST NIGHT
Steven Tyler and Adam Lambert
It’s London Fashion Week, but the real stars are not walking the runways. No, the real stars are meandering about outside like Versace-laden extras in The Walking Dead, scraping at the doorways with clenched zombie fists and begging for both attention and “BRAINS.”
Seriously, some of these “fashion extras” are un-be-f*cking-lievable. Let’s take a look at some of the best ensembles:
15. The “Racist Allergy”
14. The “Boy Lichtenstein”
The 84th Annual Academy Awards (or, as we country folks call it, The Oscars) will air this Sunday evening live from Los Angeles. 84th Annual. Do you know what that means? That adds up to 84 years of mostly attractive, wealthy people getting handed awards. And one thing even a blind person with an unusually high sex drive would admit: This year’s Best Actor nominees are some of the sexiest yet. Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Hot French Dude, Gary Oldman, Hot Mexican Dude. If I were a professional writer on the internet and this was 2008, one might even call them the “nom-nom-nominees.” It’s safe to say that Sunday’s Best Actor winner will also simultaneously be hot as sh*t.
But this isn’t the very first time in history that a handsome man has taken home the big prize. After hours scouring through the Best Actor winners over the past 80ish years, we are proud to bring you the following list: The 25 Sexiest Best Actor Winners Ever.
25. Russell Crowe, Gladiator, 2000
24. John Wayne, True Grit, 1969
23. Tom Hanks, Philadelphia, 1993 and Forrest Gump, 1994
Dermot Mulroney is the Matt LeBlanc of Dylan McDermotts. Now that that impenetrable logic is out of the way, Demot visited Sea World to hang out with some penguins while looking like the finest DILF on the Upper West Soid. (Google Image search Dermot Mulroney + Kids and the result is him running shirtless in a park. I think his kids might be his abs?)
The good news is, if I ever meet Dermot, I’ll have the perfect icebreaker: Penguins. The dude loves penguins. Look at him. Look at his face. Have you ever seen a man so dazzled by a bird? LOOK AT HIM HERE:
It took a lot of restraint for me not to Photoshop my face over that penguins so that I may pretend Dermot was so happy to see my squat little bird body there. Bonus: You can click on each photo for GIANT, WALLPAPER-SIZED VERSIONS to share with family and friends.
Anotehr MOMA-worthy shot ahead. I hope these penguins realize how lucky they are to be in the presence of Dermot Mulroney’s abs.
Nothing makes me prouder to flash my VH1 employee card than to know that I work at the same network that has made the Mob Wives‘ Big Ang a legend. Well Next Magazine feels the same way, as they transformed Angela “Big Ang” Raiola from regular old mob wife into Marilyn Monroe. The resemblance is uncanny. It is not a can. The hair, the lips, the giant t’s… it’s Marilyn at her finest. Listen to her sing Happy Birthday and just TRY not to imagine Big Ang sensuously mouthing the words to President Kennedy who she is also secretly sleeping with.
Two more classic, completely-not-nightmare-haunty photo ahead!
Paps caught Charlize Theron leaving a Beverly Hills salon yesterday, and my oh my, is she a stunner. And my oh my, does she look stunning. A little leathery, sure, but loving that bronzer on her. Oh, also, this could be basssssically anyone in LA, tall and skinny with that Chloe purse, which is side-note everyone. So great job.
Honorary Air Commandant and Redhead Prince Harry had a meet and greet with English Service personnel in Suffolk, England yesterday. He wore a uniform, and looked very hot. Here are 10 photos of him “serving” in the army.
Well, it’s happened: Lindsay Lohan has finally turned that corner. At the age of 25, it’s official: She looks worse than Woody Allen. And no one is more unimpressed than our favorite expressionless child-bride in New York, Soon-Yi Previn.
Yes, Lindsay showed up at last night’s amFAR Gala dressed in all white and with a blonde hairstyle and bangs that, instead of covering up her exhaustion, service as a Photoshop “outer glow” helping to highlight how old she looks.
Click to see a close-up on Lindsay’s look.
I don’t want anyone to panic. Just, take your seats, relax, calm down. But I should probably tell you: I forgot about Michael Phelps’s face for a second.
The man has a body of a god. A dolphin god. One with flipper feet and hands that could turn any sandwich into a panini in under 30 seconds. So kudos to Head & Shoulders dandruff shampoo for picking 14-time gold medalist (!!!) Phelps to be the body of their new campaign. And my oh my, what a body this man has. It’s like one of those 3-D paintings, where if you stare at it long enough, other forms start to appear. And if you stare really long, you can almost see the wilting Beauty And The Beast rose.
Also kudos to Head & Shouldersfor having the brilliance for allowing him to lather up and shower for our viewing pleasure. It’s completely not creepy at all but you should probably scroll through it on your own, pretending he’s beside you. In the darkness, you’ll feel his arms around you. And when you lose your way you’ll close your eyes and he has found you.
Let’s watch him take a shower together, yes?
Here he is putting dandruff shampoo into his pizza paddle hands: