Posts By Mark Graham

by (@unclegrambo)

Bret Michaels: Hemorrhage “Sounded Like A Handgun,” Promises To “Continue To Rock The World”

As we mentioned yesterday, Bret Michaels has given his first post-hemorrhage interview to People magazine and will be appearing on the cover of this week’s magazine. In the piece, he talks about how the subarachnoid hemorrhage he suffered “sounded like a handgun, like it literally popped” and the tense moments that followed:

“It made my mind go almost blank,” he said. “My neck tensed up. I couldn’t move my head at all … I knew I was slurring my words, and I was like ‘OK, this isn’t a headache. There’s something really bad happening.'”

Bret credits his amazing recovery — after all, only 10 to 20 percent of people who suffer from hemorrhages this severe go on to make a full recovery — to a combination of “will, good faith … and good medical attention.” People‘s Anne Marie Cruz, who wrote the cover story, appeared on the Today Show this morning and discussed her recent phone call with Bret, during which time he discussed his “positive bucket list,” his promise to “continue to rock the world,” and the odds of him appearing on the Celebrity Apprentice finale a few weeks from now. We’ve clipped the video for you above and will continue to keep you posted on his progress.

by (@unclegrambo)

Send Bret Michaels Well-Wishes, Watch Them Air On Behind The Music

In the five days since Bret Michaels was admitted to the hospital after suffering a massive brain hemorrhage, over 400 of you have left well-wishes for Bret in the comments section of our blog. As a way to show our collective support for Bret as he valiantly fights to recover, VH1 will be airing a selection of reader comments during our special re-airing of his Behind The Music this Thursday, April 29 at 11 p.m./10c.

If you would like to share your sentiments about Bret with everyone who’ll be watching his Behind The Music episode, all you have to do is leave a comment below sometime before this special broadcast airs tomorrow night. We’ll be combing through all of the comments and picking a selection of them to run during the episode.

As always, everyone here in the VH1 and VH1 Classic family wishes Bret a speedy recovery.

by (@unclegrambo)

Bret Michaels Upgraded To “Stable” Condition; VH1 To Re-Air His Behind The Music Special

Bret on the Beach

Bret Michaels isn’t out of the woods just yet, but there is a bit of good news to share. US Magazine is reporting that while Michaels is still under observation in the Intensive Care Unit of an unnamed hospital, his condition has been upgraded from “critical” to “stable” condition. As you no doubt know, he has been hospitalized since suffering a massive brain hemorrhage last Friday.

To show our support for our friend Bret, VH1 and VH1 Classic will re-air his recent Behind The Music special on Thursday, April 29 at 11 p.m./10c. His fans can share their messages of support for Bret’s recovery here on the VH1 Blog or at his website at; you can also post your well-wishes on his Facebook and MySpace fan pages.

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by (@unclegrambo)

SNL‘s Greatest Moments: Top Ten Cast Member Crack Ups

Saturday Night Live creator and executive producer Lorne Michaels does not look fondly upon cast members breaking character and succumbing to uncontrollable fits of laughter during sketches. While this behavior, which is known as “corpsing” in theatrical circles, is generally not rewarded by Michaels, there is no denying that some of the most indelible moments in the show’s history have come when performers have cracked themselves and their fellow cast members up during the middle of a sketch. In fact, one of those moments occurred just this past weekend when featured player Bill Hader couldn’t stop giggling while portraying a character called Stefon during Weekend Update.

So, as a means of honoring these rare moments of spontaneous levity on the program, we’ve put together the following Top Ten list of moments when cast members lost their composure and burst into laughter during a sketch. Enjoy!

10. “Hot Tub Lovers” with Will Ferrell, Rachel Dratch, Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore

“Does anyone care for spiced lamb shanks?” Mere seconds into this recurring sketch that starred Will Ferrell and Rachel Dratch as pretentiously libidinous professors at a liberal arts college, notorious SNL corpser Jimmy Fallon begins losing it. The cast does their best to keep the sketch together, but when Dratch begins feeding Ferrell lamb meat while soaking in the hot tub around the three minute mark, the bit goes off the rails.

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by (@unclegrambo)

Bret Michaels Update: He Remains In ICU, Trump Thinks He’s In “Big, Big Trouble”

Bret Michaels Pointing

After Bret Michaels suffered a massive brain hemorrhage in the early morning hours last Friday, he spent the entire weekend under close medical surveillance in the Intensive Care Unit of a yet-to-be-disclosed hospital. According to his official Facebook page, doctors are currently running a battery of tests on Michaels in an attempt to ascertain the source of the bleeding, but his team would also like to remind Bret’s legions of fans that he “is, and always has been, a fighter and survivor and is under the best medical care possible.”

Meanwhile, Donald Trump is painting a slightly more worrisome picture, telling TMZ that his current Celebrity Apprentice contestant is in “big, big trouble” and that “the prognosis is not great.” However, Trump also seems confident that Michaels is an “amazing competitor and ultimately that is the thing that could save his life.” In a nice touch, NBC added a brief clip to the end of last night’s episode of Celebrity Apprentice to remind viewers that “Everyone here at NBC wishes Bret Michaels a speedy recovery”; you can watch it below.

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by (@unclegrambo)

Fans Show Their Support For Bret Michaels

Get Well Soon, Bret!

While Bret Michaels is still in critical condition after suffering a massive brain hemorrhage early Friday morning, TMZ is now reporting that his condition has stabilized and that he’s “awake, in good spirits and talking.” That said, he’s not out of the woods just yet; the report also emphasizes the how critical the next 24 to 48 hours will be to his possible recovery. We will continue to keep you posted on any developments with his condition as soon as we get them.

In the meantime, here is a selection of well-wishes that Bret’s fans have been leaving in the comment section of our site. If you have any words of encouragement that you would like to share, you can do so either in the previous post or below.

Cassandra Says:
OMG! My prayers goes out to Bret and his family. I love his music and love watching him on anything he does and he is very inspiring to me because my mother and grandmother are diabetics and the disease is coming into play in my personal life as well. I wish him the best and fastest recovery possible!

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by (@unclegrambo)

Katy Perry: Permanent Idol Duty Can Wait Until “My T*ts Sag And My *ss Gets Huge”

We caught up with Katy Perry on the red carpet at the ASCAP awards the other night, an annual celebration for the people that pen all of your favorite pop songs (if you’re curious, Jason Mraz took home the Song of the Year award for his hit, “I’m Yours”). We asked the recent American Idol guest judge, who just so happened to be wearing a pair of $2,500 Jimmy Choo Zap sandals, if she had any aspirations to become a full-time host of the show once Simon Cowell scoots off for greener pastures at the end of this season. She backtracked a bit on the statements she made to MTV News earlier this year after her feisty feud with Kara DioGuardi, but left the door open for future consideration:

“I’ll always want to be a guest judge. Always. And when my t*ts sag and my *ss gets huge, I’ll probably want to be a permanent judge.”

All of you who have seen the recent bikini pictures of her will instantly recognize that Perry is basically telling you not to hold your breath.

by (@unclegrambo)

Hitler Would Like You To Stop Making Hitler Reaction Videos

When we first heard the news earlier this week that Constantin Films, the studio behind the German-language WWII film Downfall, was working with YouTube to shut down the scores of “Hitler Reacts To” videos that have sprouted up online, we here at breathed a sigh of relief, thinking we’d finally be able to put one of the internet’s most annoying memes comfortably in the rear view mirror. Sadly, yet expectedly, this news only resulted in more Hitler reaction videos sprouting up.

In response, our crack video guru, Mr. Pete Schultz, put together the following video, one that we’re hoping will be the final nail in the “Hitler Reacts To” meme coffin. Danke schoen.

by (@unclegrambo)

Ke$ha On SNL: A Dueling FABLife Perspective


Yesterday, my esteemed colleague Kate $pencer wrote a passionate Defen$e of Ke$ha. Her basic thesis was that Twitter Nation shouldn’t have gotten so up in arms over Ke$ha’s performance on this weekend’s Saturday Night Live because she’s little more than a living, breathing embodiment of today’s disappointing pop music scene. In other words, she’s exactly the kind of pop star that America deserves in the year 2010. While there is certainly a discussion to be had about the overall quality of the music that makes up Casey’s Top 40 the iTunes Top 10 these days, we’ll table that discussion for another time. Instead, I’m going to attempt to help explain why people reacted so viscerally to the day-glo nightmare that was Ke$ha’s SNL performance.

As I see it, there are three main components as to why this performance irritated so many of us and did the same thing to my eyes and ears that Ipecac does to one’s stomach:

1) Her Warbly Pipes: When Jay-Z declared the “Death of Auto-Tune” on The Blueprint 3 last year, most of America initially rejoiced. Sure, if his wish came true, it would mean a swift end to T-Pain‘s career, but we looked at it this way: In order to make an omelette, you gotta break a few eggs, right? But from the opening a cappella moments of Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok”, we immediately began regretting throwing our support behind Sean Carter’s musical movement, for if anyone ever needed saving from this particular ProTools effect, it was Ke$ha and her irritating Valley Girl affect (ugh, the way she enunciated her vowels!). Just how ear-splitting were her vocals, exactly? Well, if Randy Jackson were to describe them as being “pitchy,” he’d actually be giving her a compliment. Even Taylor Swift at the Grammys mistook Ke$ha’s off-key warbling for a cat howling in an alleyway.

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by (@unclegrambo)

Akon Thinks Christina Aguilera Should Stop Copying Lady Gaga


When Christina Aguilera debuted her new single, “Not Myself Tonight,” last month, the song’s bouncy, club-friendly rhythms and warm embrace of behind-the-velvet-rope-style decadence stoked the still warm embers of her beef with Lady Gaga. Now, noted child shot-putter Akon is adding fuel to this potentially explosive fire in an interview with VIBE, firmly placing himself on Team Gaga:

“I miss the old Christina Aguilera. I like the old one better than the new one. Honestly, Gaga and Christina could probably get together and do something that’s amazing. But that’s impossible if they are both trying to do the same exact thing musically … I just think [Aguilera] just needs to believe in herself more. I think sometimes she gets insecure because of all of the success Gaga has had not realizing that she was already successful before Gaga came out.”

It’s important to note that Akon has a vested interest in seeing Gaga succeed; after all, he was the one who convinced Interscope boss Jimmy Iovine to sign the pop diva in the first place, which means he most likely takes home a percentage of her earnings. At the same time, this is neither the first nor likely the last time that Aguilera has been accused of copping Gaga’s wildly successful style.

What do you think, FABLifers? Are the musical sounds of these two, petite blondes too close for your comfort, or is there enough room on the Top 20 Charts for both of them? Are you on Team Gaga or Team X-Tina? Can’t we all just get along?

[Photos: GettyImages]