Lord Hammercy! On last night’s episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Phaedra Parks got Kandi Burruss a special present for her 35th birthday. No, not a Waterford vase or a year’s worth of free legal counsel, but rather a visit from Ridickulous, Atlanta’s most well-endowed male stripper (no, we haven’t done the research, we’re just going to take Phaedra’s word for it).
Bravo’s censors had their hands full keeping Ridickulous’, um, dickulous in check—we haven’t seen a black bar that comically large since the hotel wrestling scene in Borat—but fortunately, they had a million cameras trained on the faces of the Real Housewives as they saw him unwrap his package (and then some!) for Phaedra and her friends. We’ve collected the 20 most hilarious reaction shots for you below, which range from delighted (Phaedra) to disgusted (Nene and Kandi’s mom) to dumbstruck (Kandi, Sheree).
Dr. Who star Matt Smith pretty much bowled us over at the 2011 Scream Awards last weekend. From his well-regarded work on the BBC/SyFy series, we already knew that he was equal parts dashing and down-to-earth, but VH1′s own Kate Spencer became a firsthand witness to the overall sweetness of the Best Science Fiction Actor award winner after chatting with him on the red carpet and backstage. During one of their conversations, Kate posed the question to Smith about his future on the program, and when American audiences could expect to be seeing more of him on these shores. Smith’s controversial reply?
“Well, hopefully soon, you know. I’ve got another year of Doctor Who, but then I’m certainly going to come and give it a shot – come and hang out in LA.”
The passionate Dr. Who fan community has taken this statement to mean that Smith might be preparing to leave the beloved franchise, which is just about to celebrate it’s 50th anniversary (!), when his contract expires next year. Smith has yet to clarify this statement by coming forward with his true intentions for his future as Dr. Who, but whether he’s just a savvy negotiator or feels it’s time that he tests the Hollywood waters a bit further, we’re pretty confident that if we had access to our own TARDIS time machine, we’d discover that he’s got a long and successful career ahead of him.
Before we get started, let’s acknowledge the obvious: Jon Hamm is an insanely handsome man. I think that very few people, when posed with the question “Would you trade your looks for Jon Hamm’s?”, would answer in the negative. However, at the 2011 Emmy Awards on Sunday night, he didn’t quite look his usual Hammsian self. In fact, he just looked … REGULAR HANDSOME (which, for him, equates to fugs).
It’s hard to tell exactly what went wrong on Sunday, but a natural starting point would be his hair. What did he DO to that luxurious mane of his, anyway? As we have seen in his many red carpet and acting roles, the man is capable of pulling off every hairstyle in the books, from a slicked down Brylcream special to just-out-of-bed-head. But at the Emmys, it looked like he had just stumbled upon a case of expired Vidal Sassoon mousse leftover from the 80s moments before the show and just went hogwild with that shizz in the limo. His most egregious offense, however, was not taking a pair of shears to that one piece of straggly hair that cascaded down his forehead like a reverse rat tail.
Sad news to pass along this morning. Frances Bay, the sweet old lady who played Adam Sandler‘s grandmother in Happy Gilmore and once famously battled Jerry Seinfeld for a loaf of marble rye, passed away over the weekend from complications resulting from pneumonia. The 92-year-old actress was a veteran of both the silver and small screens began working in Hollywood all the way back in the 1930s (!), making memorable appearances in shows like Twin Peaks, Happy Days, and Who’s The Boss? along the way. To (lovingly) paraphrase Jerry Seinfeld, “Rest in peace, you old bag.”
The early highlight of tonight’s 63rd Annual Emmy Awards came when Rob Lowe and Sofia Vergara began announcing the nominees for the Best Actress in a Comedic Series nominees. After some mildly painful banter between these two ridiculously good-looking human beings, the two introduced the first of the category’s five nominees, Amy Poehler. Instead of sitting in her chair and nodding at the camera politely, Poehler got up from her seat and boldly strode on stage. For a moment there, it looked like a totally spontaneous incident, like Poehler was perhaps doing a bizarre nod to the opening moments of Zoolander, when Derek Zoolander mistakenly accepts the Male Model of the Year Award. Had Amy Poehler lost her marbles?
As it turns out, no. What at first glance seemed like something shockingly spontaneous turned out to be planned from the get-go, as the other nominees—Edie Falco, Tina Fey, Laura Linney, Melissa McCarthy (who ended up taking home the Emmy) and Martha Plimpton—took to the stage in a show of female solidarity that we can only assume was a response to the whole “Are women funny?” controversy that’s been raging on the internet over the last year or so. Late Night With Jimmy Fallon executive producer Mike Shoemaker confirmed that the moment was pre-planned on his Twitter feed, writing “My brilliant friend Amy Poehler pulled that whole thing together. What a great moment.”
But was it actually a great moment? Well, for what it’s worth, we thought it was a pretty outstanding moment. It was bold, it made a statement, it shook up an otherwise blah show, Amy Poehler is a freaking LEGEND, and really, so what if it was an act that of “defiance” that Emmy producers actually knew about in advance? However, we can also see the flip side of the coin, too: What made these five ladies think that THEIR category was any more special or important than the rest of the night’s nominees, and therefore particularly deserving of a standing ovation? We’ll leave it up to you guys to decide if in our poll below.
It’s been about eight hours or so since nude photos of a young woman that bares a striking resemblance to Scarlett Johansson were leaked online. After seeing the seismic force with which these photos hit the Internet, it’s a wonder that all of the underground tubes through which information flows to the World Wide Web—the Internet is powered by underground tubes, right???—didn’t rupture and burst. Thankfully, Al Gore had the foresight to envision the necessary precautions that needed to be undertaken in case of exactly this sort of incident back when he invented the Information Superhighway™.
We here at TheFABLife have been debating not only the authenticity of these (alleged) ScarJo nudes all day, but also the rationale for them. To that end, here are three burning questions that we demand President Obama answer in a televised address by nightfall (all of which assume that it is actually Miss Johansson who appears in these pics):
1) WHO WAS SCARLETT JOHANSSON SEXTING, ANYWAY?
That is a great question! Alas, only Scarlett, the end recipient, and probably some C.I.A. operatives with high-level security clearance* that gives them the access to wiretap anyone in the United States at will have the answer to that question for sure. However, we DID do some research to help narrow it down. According to the metadata in the pictures, these photographs were “Taken with a BlackBerry Bold 9000 Last Modified Date/Time = 20:25, Oct 12, 2010.” Hmmm, where was ScarJo on October 12 of last year? Well, internet sleuths have already determined that she was in her bedroom. Based on that, the lucky louie that she sent them to be could be: Her husband at the time, Ryan Reynolds (though they would go on to divorce just two months later); her Broadway co-star, Liev Schreiber (the gossip mill seriously churned during A View From The Bridge‘s run); or possibly even one of her We Bought A Zoo co-stars Matt Damon (who is happily married) or Thomas Haden Church (who is happily unmarried). What we DO know is that she almost certainly didn’t send them to Sean Penn, because those two didn’t hook up until March of 2011.
It’s Friday! You know who loves Fridays? Gabe & Max, that’s who! Yes, they may “like” the internet (please RT!), but there’s nothing they love more than Fridays … except maybe whale penises, diarrhea dance moves, tiny apartments, dogs doing tricks and track stars being tripped by ghosts (not necessarily in that order). Don’t forget to fasten your safety belts!
It’s Friday! You know what that means, don’t you? Another exciting evening of CBS programming, starting with The Dukes of Hazzard, then Dallas, followed up by Falcon Crest and your local evening news. Oh wait, our bad, it’s no longer 1983 (even though labor force statistics show otherwise). Don’t let the doom and gloom of the Dow Jones get you down, though, because in 2011, Friday means it’s time for another new installment of Gabe & Max Like The Internet!
This week’s episode is guaranteed to make EVERYONE laugh. Everyone, that is, except Joe Piscopo. If your name is Joe Piscopo AND you used to star on Saturday Night Live, you might as well not click play on the video above. However, for everyone else that is NOT named Joe Piscopo, it’s CLICKS AHOY!
The dog days of summer are nearly upon us, but like a cool blast of freon to your prefrontal cortex, Gabe & Max are here to make your Friday considerably more chill. In their latest roundup of the videos that made the Internet guffaw over the past week, our daring co-hosts opine on serious and highly controversial¹ topics like:
The role of preachers at NASCAR events who use the opportunity to thank the man upstairs for blessing them with “smokin’ hot wives”
Whether or not breathing in gasses that make your voice sound quote-unquote “hilarious” is worth the adverse effect it can have your life expectancy
Should you shave your forearms, and if so, should you shave them with a super sharp kitchen knife?
After a two week hiatus, our friends Gabe Delahaye (@gabedelahaye) and Max Silvestri (@maxsilvestri) are back with another cool, breezy, not-at-all-humid-whatsoever edition of Gabe & Max Like The Internet! We can think of no better way to beat the heat than to stay inside all weekend long and just watch these two comedians riff on the funniest videos the internet has to offer. In this week’s episode, Gabe & Max riff on the best (only?) water jet pack fail ever, Leonard Nimoy’s outstanding work as pitchman for Magnavox, and a truly delightful¹ lady named Sister Sunshine. ENJOY.