Posts By hopperd

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This Star Trek: TNG Cast Reunion Is Awesome And Totally Not Nerdy AT ALL

Patrick Stewart at TNG EXPOsed reunion calgaryHere’s the entire principal cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation reuniting onstage at TNG EXPOsed in Calgary in honor of the show’s 25th anniversary (Sidenote: 25 years?? I just died of oldness and someone else is now finishing this post.)

If you want to watch hundreds of shrieking TNG fans hurl questions at Patrick Stewart, Levar Burton, Brent Spiner, Jonathan Frakes, Gates McFadden, Wil Wheaton, et al for an hour, or in other words, if you are a SANE PERSON WHO USES THEIR TIME AS WELL AS I DO, you can watch the entire reunion below in 5 convenient Youtube chunks.

Here’s the first part, beginning with about 6 minutes of “wooing” introductions and cast member dancing (you can skip over it, if you’re a LAME CASUAL FAN). The Michael Dorn / Worf intro is cut off for some reason, probably because Worf asked Picard very reasonably if he could be introduced and Picard shot him down 70 times:

Watch the rest of the parts below, including a special magical flower-bearing guest in Part 5:

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Dog’s Best Friend: Lab Becomes Blind Golden Retriever’s Seeing Eye Dog

Lab becomes golden retrievers seeing eye dogReady to cry some tears onto your swelling heart? Ok!

Here’s the story of Tanner, a golden retriever born with cataracts in both eyes (dogs hate CATaracts) and prone to body seizures, who had to be given up to a veterinary clinic and was nearly put down, but ended up making meeting Blair, a Labrador who had trouble socializing after being shot (seriously this gets happy very soon). The two soon ended up becoming friendly with one another, with Blair helping to guide the seeing-impaired Tanner, sometimes even by literally grabbing Tanner’s leash, and Tanner’s seizures eventually faded and the two remain close companions (who are up for adoption).

Prepare to smilecry! This movie is total Dogscar bait:

(via Jezebel)

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The Last Song On The Rock Of Ages Movie Soundtrack Is Not Real

Much has been said about the forthcoming Rock Of Ages film adaptation, from “Is this real” when we first heard about it to “Seriously, is this real?” when we saw the trailer, but the movie soundtrack was just unveiled, and I really can’t wrap my head around some of these.

Check out the last track on the album:

20. “Don’t Stop Believin’” – Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta, Tom Cruise, Alec Baldwin, Russell Brand, Mary J. Blige

Wh..whaaa? That’s a real thing, really recorded on a real album? That people will listen to and be like “Yeah! Sing that song I’m not tired of, Tom Cruise and Russell Brand!”

I just time-traveled back to six months ago and showed that to my past self and my past self was like “WHY ARE ALL THOSE WORDS IN A ROW, that’s can’t possibly be a real thing” and I was like “Oh just you wait!” then I made out with myself and it was actually pretty decent!

Come to think of it, the first track on the album wouldn’t have seemed real either if we’d seen it last year:

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This New Dark Knight Rises Trailer Looks Pretty Stupid, No?

New Dark Knight Rises TrailerThe entire internet is posting the new Dark Knight Rises trailer today, as if any new footage of the film can possibly make me want to see it more than my current level of 9,000,000% (mathematically the highest percent possible).

I just watched the trailer myself and frankly, and not to be inflammatory, but I just don’t see what the big deal is.

Watch the new trailer below, and see if you can make any sense out of this:

Weird, right? I mean, I guess those pens are pretty cool if you need to like, sign stuff or whatever, and 95 cents is a sweet bat-deal, but where was Christian Bale in this thing? And no Bane? And what was with the film quality? Those pens are gonna look like garbage on IMAX.

I don’t know, I’m still confident Christopher Nolan’s gonna pull this out. And worse case scenario, I wouldn’t mind a consolation muffin / Catwoman meow-pen combo.

At least it still makes a little more sense than the last Dark Knight Rises trailer.

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Mad Men Episode 507: The Fairly CodParents

This week’s Mad Men episode, “At The Codfish Ball” (titled after Captain Hook’s screams) featured not only a return appearance by grown-up Alex Mack, now a series regular, but also her character’s father, who just so happened to be Leland Palmer, the relentlessly-f***ed-up father from Twin Peaks (aka actor Ray Wise).

Needless to say, anyone who’s watched Twin Peaks had the same semi-shocked reaction last night:

I’ve enjoyed pretty much every episode of this Mad Men season so far, and this week’s episode was no different, highlighting one of the aspects of Mad Men that the series does particularly (and unfortunately) well: Showing the characters’ unparallelled abilities to find a reason to be depressed in the midst of complete joy.

We have four concurrent, happy-turned-depressing stories:

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4 Comedians Whose First Cars Were Worse Than Yours

My First CarComedy Central just released this series of standup snippets entitled “First Car Stories,” which features (as the title barely implies) four comedians each telling the stories behind the first cars they ever owned, attempted to own, or owned for several seconds before instantly destroying them.

Surely, many of you will find these stories hilariously relatable in all their painful, awkward, broke glory. I live in New York and don’t own a car, so I don’t even have to relate, I just get to watch these and LAUGH AT YOU ALL!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA (rat carring a finger full of garbage just ran across my feet).

Take it away, four amusingly painful stories:

1. Morgan Murphy’s 1998 Bus

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Game Of Thrones Recap: The Kids In The Harrenhal

It’s Game Of Thrones Season 2, episode 5 entitled “The Ghost of Harrenhal”. Will this version of “Ghost” involve two lovers spinning pottery together then a rat tunneling through the pot and into the couples’ stomachs? You’ll have to read on to find out. Nahh, I can tell you now: It literally does!

We pick up right where the last episode left off, with the show’s magical element jumping from “omens, prophetic dreams and unlikely powers” to “witch lady giving birth to magical shadowy deathmonster”. Needless to say, Stannis’ closest companion Davos is still shaken up by the unusual birth he witnessed, and confesses his doubts about Melisandre’s intentions to his lord:

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Dentist Removes All Of Her Ex-Boyfriend’s Teeth In Possible Slight Overreaction

A dentist in Wroclaw, Poland is facing up to three years in prison for removing all of her ex-boyfriend’s teeth when he came to her practice with a routine toothache:

“I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions. “But when I saw him lying there I just thought, ‘What a bastard’ and decided to take all his teeth out,” she admitted.

Toothless cabbie Marek said: “She told me my mouth was numb and I wouldn’t be able to feel anything for a while and that the bandage was there to protect the gums, but that I would need to see a specialist.

“I didn’t have any reason to doubt her, I mean I thought she was a professional. But when I got home I looked in the mirror and couldn’t f***ing believe it. The b**ch had emptied my mouth.”

Sure, this might seem a bit extreme, but who among us HASN’T wanted to remove all of an exes’ teeth after they left us for another woman/man? Actually, come to think of it, I’ve never even come close to thinking that. That’s insane, even by “exaggerated jealousy” standards. I was just trying to blindly devil’s advocate her case, because it IS a little funny, even if my teeth also just got pulled out as I was typing this for improperly devil’s advocating her case.

Congratulations, Wroclaw, Poland! You now know how f***ed up a thing you have to do for the internet to notice!

(Arbroath via Gawker)

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10 New Photos Of Downton Abbey SEASON THREE!

Here are 10 new photos of the cast of Downton Abbey filming Season 3, slated to air in England this coming September (and on PBS in January of 2013). The photos are somewhat mundane, but we know how absurd Season 2 of the show got, so we can only assume that they’re actually photos of EVEN CRAZIER STUFF happening that we just don’t know yet.

Here are the 10 Downton Abbey Season 3 photos, along with our educated guesses of what is probably happening:

1.

OH MY GOD IT’S CARSON! Where is he walking? To Downton Abbey to arrange silverware? To a new RIVAL Abbey, UPTON Abbey? Or he’s dead and his spirit is returning to haunt Thomas for using the incorrect livery for Tuesday night soup with a young up-and-coming politician named WINSTON CHURCHILL?

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The entire Third Season is filmed first-person from Lord Grantham’s perspective, and this is everyone smiling at him.

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