Posts By hopperd

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Rebecca Black’s New Video “Sing It” Is Basically Instagram J*zzing In Your Face

Rebecca Black Sing It VideoHere’s the video for Rebecca Black’s new single “Sing It”. I guess we have to post it, but are we obligated to complain about it? GRRRR it’s bad! Why can’t you make good music like The Beatles, Rebecca Black? Whatever happened to music?? Bob Dylan, Miles Davis, those were the days! Now music people suck.

Or maybe that’s what they want! They want it to be bad so the video will spread like a virus! Like some “virus video!” OH NO we fell for it!

Anyway, the video is basically Instagram ejaculating into your face for three minutes, so now we know what that feels like:

What were we just talking about? Garden State?

(via Crushable)

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Obviously Watch This Tina Fey Between Two Ferns Clip

Here’s a clip of Tina Fey sitting down with Zach Galifianakis as part of his upcoming “Between Two Ferns” Comedy Central special. It’s two minutes long and obviously great and you should be watching it right now but I’m gonna type some more so it looks like I did something.

Here’s some more words to pad this post cause I am doing work! Really, just watch the video. Gonna go eat a sandwich. Got my sandwich. Eating the sandwich now. Good sandwich!

Video thing watch please:

My work here is done! Such good work I did here, copying and pasting that code and it being already great. Will be mailing the internet my invoice this afternoon (it’s still Invoices@NetBucks.info?)

(via Critical Mob)

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Perfect Thing: “What If Boy Avengers Posed Like The Girl Avenger?”

Steve Niles posted this re-imagined version of the Avengers movie poster entitled “What If The Male Avengers Posed Like The Female One?”, and it is perfect and needs no further explanation:

I thought that IS how The Hulk usually posed? I need to pay some more attention. Either way, really takes me back to the early 90s when Marvel cards gradually became my gateway to pornography.

Seriously though, Hollywood, how about you class this sh*t up and be more like the G.I. Joe movie poster?

(via @steveniles)

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Here’s The Worst Pass In NBA History

Carlos Boozer Bad PassI’m slightly hesitant to criticize anyone’s basketball-playing ability, as I’m one of the world’s worst humans at going near that sport (I ranked #107 on the Forbes 500 list of “Worst People At Basketball”, a list includes ALL BABIES).

That said, the following pass from Carlos Boozer in this week’s Bulls / 76ers playoff game is just one of the funniest, most inexplicable things I’ve ever seen. I guess we all make the equivalent mistakes in our own non-basketball lives; just yesterday, at a coffee shop I ripped open a Splenda packet with my teeth in front of a bunch of people then spilled coffee when I attempt to swirl it in, which was basically my own version of whipping my ‘sexiness / dignity’ basketball seven rows into the crowd.

Again though, this is not about us. It’s about laughing at this dude:

(via Ball Don’t Lie)

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Watch Comedian Hasan Minhaj Completely Dismantle The Ashton Kutcher PopChips Ads

Ashton Kutcher PopChips Indian AdLast week, Ashton Kutcher starred in a commercial for PopChips as a brownfaced, Bollywood-ish Indian character declaring the chips to be “The Bombay”. The ads were promptly taken down after a number of negative responses, and PopChips semi-apologized, saying the ads were only meant in good fun.

Here’s a video response to the ads from comedian Hasan Minhaj, who makes a compelling and hilariously passionate case for why the ads aren’t just regular commercial stupid, but they’re actually offensively hyperterrible, both on a quasi-racist level and on a “basic comedic logic” level.

The video response itself is, ironically, really funny (language NSFW):

(via HuffPo Comedy)

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“Kickboxer: Just The Kicking” Is One Minute Shorter Than The Movie Kickboxer

Kickboxer Supercut

Do you love the Van Damme movie Kickboxer, but just can’t stand all that boring down-time between kicks? (I know I begin a lot of posts with jokey, specific hypotheticals, but this time, I COMPLETELY FEEL THIS WAY).

Good news! Here’s every single kick from the movie Kickboxer kicked together into one kickin’ Supercut (kneeings included!) Basically, if you took this video and added the scene where the sensei drops the coconut onto Van Damme’s abs from a tree, you would have the entire movie Kickboxer:

My review? This punches ass!

(via FilmDrunk)

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Game Of Thrones Recap: How Not To Train Your Dragons

It’s Game Of Thrones Episode 16, entitled “The Old Gods And The New,” which refers to both the symbolic ‘changing of the guard’ at Winterfell and King’s Landing, as well as the literal disparity between the Wildlings’ “Old Gods” (The Gods of Murder and Rape) and the modern society’s “New Gods” (The Gods of More Humane Murder and Slightly Lighter Rape).

The episode opens with Winterfell instantly being conquered by Theon, thus confirming Bran’s prophetic dream:

Theon instructs Bran to yield the town to him and Bran does, prompting the wildling Osha to tell Bran “Don’t you see? It’s your dream – the sea has come to Winterfell.” Bran’s like, “Thanks, Sparknotes, but we all figured that out a week ago.”

With this dream now come true, Bran worries, “Uhoh, I hope I don’t have to take the SATs naked at this place that’s kind of like my high school gym but also part of it’s like my friend Jeff’s house, and Jeff was there but it wasn’t really Jeff, you know? But I knew him in the dream. So weird!”

Theon continues to play the part of a proud conquering Greyjoy, and tells the townspeople to kneel to him, though not for the reason Theon is usually telling people to kneel to him:

Read more…

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Check Out This AMAZING Supermoon Photo

If you didn’t get a chance to see the much talked-about Supermoon on Saturday, check out this amazing photo:

Amazing Supermoon Pic

WOW! That’s really something. Damn you, cloudy New York skies!

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R.I.P. Meow, The World’s Fattest Cat

Meow The Cat Dead

According to the Santa Fe Animal Shelter & Humane Society, Meow, the 39-pound cat who took the internet by storm, died this weekend of pulmonary failure. He was 2. Meow is survived by his 87-year-old former owner, his vets at the shelter, and his beloved constantly-full ‘food cauldron.’

At least Meow got to meet Hugh Grant AND Anderson Cooper shortly before passing, knocking out two of the three things on his bucket list (the third was ‘eat a life-sized lasagna replica of Saturn’).

Farewell, Meow! You were adorable and charming and prrrrobably should not have weighed 39 pounds.

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Nostalgia Alert: Mr. Belding On Mad Men

Just weeks after Alex Mack showed up on Mad Men, last night, the show welcomed another nostalgia-inducing guest star into the fold: Dennis Haskins, aka Richard Belding from Saved By The Bell:

Belding Mad Men

Dennis Haskins Mad Men

Haskins played the small but entertaining role of a Cool Whip ‘test kitchen’ scientist with an inordinately casual relationship with his Cool-Whip-students who’s also constantly proctoring weekly Cool-Whip-school dances. (Also, the coolest Cool Whip employee used to be able to stop time and talk to the camera the first couple seasons but then they phased that out.)

NEXT WEEK ON MAD MEN – The search for Megan’s replacement comes down to a handful of candidates: Kel, Count Duckula, Small Wonder, Donnie Jeffcoat from Wild And Crazy Kids, Voltron’s left arm, and the fish from Eureeka’s Castle.