… Yes, so much so, he’s apparently agreed to do a reality show in the UK. 2005’s It Boy Jesse Metcalfe has finally conceded his career’s in the toilet so has signed up for annual humiliation-fest I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out Of Here! (It may have lasted one season in the US, but has been running every year since 2002 in the UK. We just can’t get enough of D-listers eating kangaroo balls). Apparently, Jesse’s set to rake in $175,000 (£100,000) for his appearance on the show next month, which has got to be at least four times what he made for Insanitarium (what do you mean, you’ve never heard of it?)
“Jesse’s been seen around London the last few days and he’s made no secret of the fact that I’m a Celeb want him in the show. He’s keen to join. He wouldn’t have wasted his time flying over from the States otherwise,” a source told the News of the World.
It’s also been rumoured that 1999’s It Girl Shannon Elizabeth will also be joining Jesse in the Australian jungle, and if so, they’ll join the esteemed ranks of fellow Americans David Gest and Janice Dickinson, who previously prostrated themselves in front of the British viewing public in exchange for exposure, and cold, hard, cash. [Photo: WireImage ]
As the “Madonna and Guy: Why?” juggernaut continues to gather speed, the British media have piled in with their usual subtlety to pick apart just why the control-freak superstar and the Mockney posh boy couldn’t make it work. Below, a précis. When can we call Too Much Information overload?
Ahhh. It seems amazing that this time last week we didn’t know any of this. And now we do, and our lives are even more enriched. Thank heaven for celebrity breakups and PR battles. [Photo: WireImage]
Well, almost. It was just a normal weeknight at London’s latest royal hangout, posh club Whiskey Mist, and Princes William and Harry were getting absolutely trashed performing their royal duties by helping stop the credit crunch. Probably. Anyhow, Christina Aguilera was also there with invisible husband Jordan Bratman, and in a snippet which says more about the cult of celebrity versus royalty than anything, Wills decided to introduce himself.
“But in the midst of all the fun, lonely Wills suddenly put down his glass and said: ‘Excuse me, ladies, I’m just going to say hi to Christina.’ We watched him puff out his chest and stride across the packed bar to the corner where the American singer was sitting with her hubby, Jordan Bratman. A red-faced William first had to convince her minder he was the real deal. We heard him whisper: ‘Er, hi. I’m Prince William, I just wanted to say hello.’ After a bit of wrangling, Christina, 27, gave the nod and Wills was in,” reports The Mirror.
Cringe! We are so embarrassed for the poor balding royal having to beg Christina to let him in her inner sanctum. But the night wasn’t over yet – Paris Hilton arrived and in her own inimitable style, waltzed up to the princes, announcing, “Don’t you love the Princes? They are so hot. I just had to say hi.” Another report has Paris doing anything to get the attention of Wills. “She started doing this really stupid dance, basically shaking her ass in front of Prince William,” says the London Paper.
We don’t know about you, but these A-listers at one of London’s most exclusive clubs sound like a bunch of 12-year-olds at a school disco. We just hope Harry’s gf Chelsy Davy (who we’ve got a soft spot for, not sure why) didn’t prostrate herself in front of Paris either. She could eat her for lunch. [Photos: Getty Images, Splash News Online]
Man, we’ve missed Colin Farrell! A few years ago, you couldn’t move for stories of the priapic Irish star bedding, or “comforting” every A-list star going. Those were good days. Then he went to rehab and got boring. But Col’s proved he hasn’t lost his brilliant candid style, and spoke out about the famous sex tape he made with ex-girlfriend Nicole Narain back in 2003.
“I think I was high,” he told British interviewer Jonathan Ross, adding, “It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
Colin sued Nicole to stop her distributing the tape, and won the case in 2006. “At the end of the deposition the man in charge said, ‘I hope you’ve learned your lesson Mr. Farrell,’ and I said, ‘Absolutely, next time I’ll take the tape with me’.”
There could be more? Excellent! Let the speculation begin! (But good GOD Colin please rethink that hairstyle) [Source: Digital Spy, Photo: Getty Images]
We reported a couple of weeks back that Kate Moss had “vowed” (in that British-tabloid-speak) to give up her hardcore partying in order to make her relationship with The Kills guitarist Jamie Hince work out. And no sooner had we spoken, than the new pretender to her Caner Crown stepped up to the plate! We give you Kirsten Dunst, enjoying a night out at LA spot La Poubelle. Truly, Kate would be proud at her commitment to the partying cause, even to the point of having an unlit cigarette dangling from her lips.
Actually, we don’t know why we didn’t spot this similarity before. They both work that dishevelled, sexy, dirty-blonde look, both date rock boys and er, both have names beginning with K! They’re sisters in spirit, innit. [The Sun; Photo: X-17 Online]
Related Scandalist Content: Kate Moss Resigns As Party Queen
Mel B definitely has one of the fiercest bodies going these days, but we have to question the way she showed it off on the red carpet last night at the MOBO (Music Of Black Origin) awards in London. Spice Mama Mel was over in London to host the show, and rocked up looking like a cross between Grace Jones and Kylie Minogue in the Can’t Get You Out Of My Head video with a hooded dress. (Later, she moved the hood down to over her shoulders, which leads us to think her stylist was frantically shouting, “Mel! Mel! It’s not supposed to go over your head!” at her from the crowds).
Throughout the show — which saw British star Estelle pick up two awards and Leona Lewis get booed for not turning up at all Mel changed into a few different outfits, channelling at various points, Britney Spears in the Oops I Did It Again era, and someone wearing a cat on their head.
But it was all in vain for poor Mel. Because the real deal was there, showing you just how to wear a hood, a mask and still look scary/cool at the same time. We give you Grace Jones. May she never change. [Photos: Getty Images]
When David Duchovny checked himself into sex rehab a few months ago, the world giggled to itself (sex rehab! How very 90’s-Michael-Douglas-esque!) and then felt a bit sorry for Téa Leoni. We assumed she’d been putting up with David’s bad-boy behaviour for some time, but the crushing silence from her side of the fence should have told us something was up. Come on, she’s a celebrity, she could have worked the “My Marriage Hell With Shagger David” angle a bit more, no? As it turns out, the couple have not only split up, but Téa’s been receiving “explicit text messages” on her phone from none other than Billy Bob Thornton. Yes the five-time married movie star and one-time blood vial sharer with Angelina Jolie is now in the mix!
Apparently, Téa’s been spotted at Billy’s gigs, and “even helps him load and unload his truck.” Acting as a groupie-cum-roadie – now that’s LOVE.
Meanwhile, a spokesperson for Téa confirmed her breakup with David, saying: “Yes, they have separated. She is living on her own with the children in New York, but we did not want to announce it for the sake of the children until after David had received treatment for his problems.”
To be honest, we don’t blame her. David Duchovny or Billy Bob Thornton? Ever since he worked that Stetson and teeth look in Intolerable Cruelty, we so would. Go for it, Téa! [Daily Mail; Photos: Getty Images; AFP]
The lot of the smaller man is a difficult one. We feel for them, we really do, what with the model girlfriends who tower over them and strangers saying to them “you look much bigger on TV!” while sunning yourself in Barbados. Actually, we don’t feel sorry for Simon Cowell and his millions at all. But it is quite funny to report that Simon’s Britain’s Got Talent co-judge Piers Morgan has spilled his height-making secrets.
“If you look carefully, Simon grows between shows. When we’re on Britain’s Got Talent he’s smaller then me, then suddenly his three pillows arrive and he’s taller than me!”
Love it. Stacked heels, puffy hair and three cushions – we still know you’re a shortarse, Simon. [Photo: WireImage]
It’s been rumored, and denied, then rumored some more for ages now, but British newspapers have now gone on the record to confirm that Madonna and Guy Ritchie are about announce their divorce. Yes, one of the least likely pairings in showbiz, which saw Madonna pretend to like sipping bitter in a pub and develop a strange London/Michigan hybrid accent, and Guy pretend he didn’t mind having his career eclipsed by Madonna’s, has proved that it’s not going to last the course.
“It’s very sad. They were a great couple and brilliant parents. They just couldn’t live together any more,” a source told The Sun. “Despite huge attempts to patch things up they both knew deep down that divorce was on the cards. It wasn’t a matter of ‘if’ but ‘when’. They tried hard over the last few months but their fighting was getting out of control.”
Madge was said to have wanted to keep the split on hold until after her Sticky and Sweet tour, but despite public shows of unity at Guy’s RocknRolla premiere, things have become untenable between them — including rows over Madonna’s plans to adopt another baby. Guy’s now set to fly back from France and collect his things from their Marylebone house and move into their Wiltshire mansion.
“He’s a really nice guy. I don’t think there are many blokes who can keep her happy. She’s famous for her reinvention, and it looks like Guy’s just another chapter in that reinvention,” Sun showbiz editor Gordon Smart told breakfast show GM:TV this morning.
It’s unclear at the moment what’s going to happen to their three children — Lourdes, Rocco and David Banda — but if we know Madonna at all (and we think we do. It keeps us happy, OK?), we’ll focus on the positive and look forward to the emotional, angry, sad “split album” in 2010. [Photo: WireImage]
Everyone’s favourite SDILF (that’s Step-Dad I’d Like To F*** of course! Hmmm, not sure it’s going to catch on), Ashton Kutcher, has poured his heart out to the November issue of British Cosmopolitan about being totally loved up with Demi Moore and shit. Apparently, post dating crazy Brittany Murphy, Ashton was looking forward to putting it about a bit, to say the least.
“When I first met Demi, I had no desire to be in a relationship. We met in New York, where I was hosting Saturday Night Live, and at the time I was saying to myself, ‘I’m going to party, I’m going to sleep with this girl and that girl, and just have a good time.’ I was introduced to Demi at a hotel bar by a mutual friend I didn’t realize who she was right away. And she thought I was hitting on her friend!” he says.
But we all know how that turned out, don’t we? A happy, Kabbalah-endorsed Hollywood ending for Demi, Ashton, the kids (who had his posters on their wall, natch) and Bruce Willis, all lining up for the wow-that’s-progressive blended family shot. But thank god! Ashton is actually human after all, and did entertain ideas of punching Bruce out (well, kind of) before they all became NBFs.
“In the early stages of our relationship, it was difficult dealing with Bruce. I’d think, ‘He’s the guy who used to sleep with my wife’, but once you overcome the jealousy, which is just insecurity, it gets easier. Bruce is now one of my favourite people to hang out with.”
Thanks Ash. That’s all we need to do ‘overcome our jealousy’. That way, we too can have our exes hanging around while we’re on holiday trying to have some, er, quality time with our other half. Nice. [Photo: Getty Images]