Thanksgiving is the holiday of gratitude, food, and family. We gather around the table, connect with our loved ones, and prioritize what and who really matters to us. This week’s episode of Asylum, “The Origins of Monstrosity,” illustrates what happens when that familial loss is absent … Briarcliff style. From a sociopathic child who has no emotional attachment to her mother to a psychologist who suffers from abandonment issues, we break down the family issues surrounding AHS. Even though your family may exhibit all of their glorious dysfunction on Thanksgiving, just be thankful that you are not amongst the patients at Briarcliff.
1. Running with Scissors – Oh how we’ve missed having a signature demonic child around AHS! Well, we can put our anxieties to rest, now that we’ve met the devil incarnate, little Jenny, who has never cried in her young life and possibly murdered her friend with a pair of scissors. While she stands over her friend’s body and tells the police a “tall bearded man” killed her, her mother suspects her daughter was the perpetrator. She confirms this theory and admits her to Briarcliff after she discovers a lock of Jenny’s friend’s hair in her daughter’s pocket. The killings don’t end there. Later in the episode, Jenny again stands over a dead body innocently explaining to a police officer how a tall, bearded man killed her mother. After her mother admitted her to Briarcliff, did Jenny feel abandoned? Or is she simply incapable of empathy? Read more…
As we travel home, hop into our elastic Thanksgiving pants and proceed to inhale turkey over the next week before passing out on the sofa with the football game on, we must take a time to pause and reflect. What are we thankful for? What makes us happy, and how can we improve ourselves for the upcoming year as 2012 comes to a close? Though there are still a couple of days before Thanksgiving, I already began to ponder these thoughts. Yes, I love my family. Yes, I adore my friends. But what am I really thankful for? Four more years of Sasha and Malia Obama in the White House!
Whatever your politics may be, you can’t deny that the 11- and 14-year-old daughters of Barack and Michelle Obama are adorable. From the intellect they’ve inherited from their brilliant parents to their keen fashion senses, the first daughters are role models and destined for greatness themselves. Here are four reasons why I love the Obama girls and why I’m looking forward to spending four more years with them:
1. We’re Watching Them Grow Up – Sasha and Malia were just 7 and 10 when they entered the White House, and four more years of an Obama presidency means Malia will be 18 and Sasha will be 15 by the time Obama’s term is complete. Thus, some of their most formative years and milestones will be spent at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Lucky for us, we’ll hopefully get to share some of these experiences with them. In the next several years, Malia will be taking driving lessons, going on college tours, and dare we say, dating? We can’t wait to see a photo of the Secret Service accompanying Malia and a Sidwell student to dinner and a movie.
Do Javier Bardem’s bad hair days translate to Oscar bait? We get a feeling there’s to be a relationship between Bardem’s acclaimed roles and his hairdos … and don’ts. And we’re not the only ones, now that everyone’s singing his praises as Skyfall’s villain Raoul Silva.
The Spanish actor initially gained recognition for his performance in 2000’s Before Night Falls, but it was his turn as the bloodthirsty Anton Chigurh in No Country for Old Men that solidified his spot on the Hollywood A-list and won him an Academy Award. While his acting chops proved impressive, people seemed more consumed by the bizarre bob he sported in the film — including Bardem himself. During his Oscar acceptance speech he thanked the Coen brothers for putting “one of the most horrible hair cuts in history over my head.” And the guy was not exaggerating. Read more…
Last week’s episode of Asylum left us on a cliffhanger: Anne Frank was pointing a gun at Dr. Arden’s head and exposed him to be SS officer and experimental doctor Hans Gruber. This week, we finally discover the man behind the monster mask and the mystery behind Anne Frank. Before Anne has time to shoot Arden, the Briarcliff guards catch her and alert her husband of her violent disobedience. Her husband discloses that Anne Frank is actually Charlotte Cohen, who is suffering from postpartum depression after giving birth to their son. She copes by absorbing herself in the Holocaust, reliving it in an attempt to change its outcome. Not only does she convince Sister Jude that she was Anne Frank, but she definitely convinced me. I loved how Ryan Murphy created a second life for Anne Frank, but I should have known that she fabricated her story seeing as she is living in a mental institution. Talk about unreliable characters on this show.
Sister Jude releases Anne from the institution to be with her husband, but he soon realizes he can’t handle her anymore. He desperately tries to re-admit her back into Briarcliff, and guess who is ready to accept her with open arms? None other than Dr. Arden. Arden performs a lobotomy on her in an excruciating scene that left my skin crawling. Not to worry, though! Arden transforms her into the Stepford wife her husband always wanted. “I’ve never been happier,” she says to him sedately as she hugs her baby. This is one of my favorite storylines in the show so far, so I hope this isn’t the last we see of Anne Frank…I mean, Charlotte. Read more…
American Horror Story is back with a vengeance this week with the most badass broad at Briarcliffe: Anne Frank. While most of us thought Anne tragically died at the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp just weeks before its liberation in 1945, Ryan Murphy‘s fictional Anne survived the camps and headed to the states with an American liberator with whom she fell in love. Frank apparently published her diary in the 50s, but couldn’t reveal her true identity because “the 15 year old girl had to stay martyred.” By identifying herself as Anne Frank, people assumed she was crazy and sent her to the asylum.
Anne doesn’t need to look too far for Nazi retribution. Apparently, Dr. Arden has much more to hide than being a mad scientist, pervert, and murderer. He was also a Nazi – which explains how Arden learned his cruel experiments. Not only does Anne remember him from Bergen-Belsen, but the prostitute who kicked Dr Arden at his house also discovered Nazi plans along with his disturbing photos of tortured women. Anne witnessed Arden, or Hans Gruber as he was known at the camps, choosing women from the barracks to be the recipients of his barbaric examinations.
Let’s just step back for a second. Can anyone get lower than Arden? If you’re having a bad day or are feeling bad about yourself, just remember things could be worse. At least you’re not Dr. Arden! At the end of the episode, Anne and Arden find each other together at last in his doctor’s room. She pulls out a pistol and shoots him in the leg, deservedly.
Murphy’s Anne Frank could be taken right out of Quentin Tarantino’s Inglorious Bastards , a Jew who is ready to seek justice on her Nazi oppressors. She is strong, convinced of her principles, and isn’t afraid of holding a gun. Anne famously said in her diary, “It’s a wonder I haven’t abandoned all my ideals, they seem so absurd and impractical. Yet I cling to them because I still believe, in spite of everything, that people are truly good at heart.” In Murphy’s world, this innocent 15 year old has given way to a nihilistic woman who knows that evil can truly exist in people. And by people, we mean Dr. Arden.
Last night’s episode of American Horror Story: Asylum exposed many repressed truths of our favorite characters. Sister Jude’s haunted past continues to unravel, and Sister Mary Eunice has had a sexual awakening that cannot be tamed. This was all set amid the backdrop of a storm that was “supposed to affect the entire Eastern seaboard.” That certainly hits a bit close to home this week for us this week with Sandy. Did Ryan Murphy know something before the rest of us? Anyway, since this episode begins to reveal the subconscious of Sister Jude, Dr. Arden and Sister Eunice, there were plenty of juicy, unfiltered quotes. Here are 10 of our favorite lines of the episode, showing that much of the “crazy” isn’t just restricted to Briarcliff’s patients.
“You have quite a suspicious mind, sister, bordering on the delusional. Or maybe it’s just a form of projection. A defense to protect your own guilty conscience.” — Dr. Thredson on beginning to decode Sister Jude
“You can swear all you like, Mr. Walker, but I will get to the truth. In here. We have all the time in the world.” — Dr. Arden while he’s experimenting on Dr. Walker
As a young kid, there’s no dream like qualifying for the Olympics. Whether you grew up admiring Kerri Strug, Mia Hamm or Michael Phelps, you’ve probably pictured yourself on that podium, waving your hand proudly in the air to fans as the National Anthem blares around you. Well, not many of us become professional athletes, but Halloween is that time where we can fulfill that little fantasy of ours. And because the 2012 women’s gymnastics team is AWESOME, here’s how you can become an honorary member of the Fierce Five and take home the gold this Halloween! (And if you can rope in four other friends to join you, even better.)
1. Buy a plain red leotard online at a discount dance supply store ($18.05)
2. Dot the red leotard with Lumiere Dimensional Metallic Paint & Adhesive from an art supply store ($1.99)
Halloween means candy corn, haunted houses, and your dad wearing that musty vampire outfit yet again. But it also means Halloween specials on TV! Throughout the years, the small screen has captured the fun of dressing up for the holidays. It’s a time for our favorite characters to get creative and just a tad inappropriate as they sport costumes from the topical, the slutty, or other clever ideas that perfectly reflect their own personalities. Here’s a list of some of our favorite Halloween costumes from TV over the years that may give you some inspiration of what to do…and what not to do.
Best Mystery Costume – The Slutty Pumpkin (How I Met Your Mother): It was that crisp, autumnal night on Halloween when Ted Mosby thought he met the love of his life…in a costume that has become the show’s famed “Slutty Pumpkin.” Though her face was veiled, this mystery woman became the object of Ted’s harvest-filled fantasies. Many years later, we discovered that the woman was none other than Katie Holmes! Even though the costume doesn’t have much originality, we give them props for mocking the “slutty fill-in-the-blank” outfit.
Last week’s premiere of American Horror Story: Asylum left me with a lot to mull over. From Lana Winters’ institutionalization at Briarcliff Manor to Dr. Arden’s experiments on Kit Walker, there were many questions to be answered and new back stories to fill in. “Tricks and Treats” didn’t further the plot as much as delve deeper into characters introduced in the premiere and welcome some new terrifying patients to Briarcliff. We learn more about why Sister Jude is such a bitter, cruel person — she just wanted to entertain the troops! — and are introduced to psychiatrist Dr. Oliver Thredson (Zachary Quinto!). AHS would never need an episode entirely dedicated to Halloween, since it always is such a fright fest. Still, “Tricks and Treats” had some particularly disturbing and sadistic moments for the holiday that left me clutching my pillow for dear life (go on, laugh), which is why I am recapping this episode with the Top 5 Screamtastic Moments.
Scream 1 – The episode opens with Winters’ lover Wendy and friends worried over Lana’s institutionalization at Briarcliff Manor. She misses her dearly and says, “Nothing makes sense without her.” Aww. They’re all trying to find ways to release her from Briarcliff, but can’t seem to find a solution. However, it already appears someone is listening to their thoughts. (Hmmm…could someone be following them?) After Wendy’s friends have left and she gets out of the shower (a clever nod to Pyscho), she walks through her house only to find that Freddy-like monster from last episode lurking in her hallway. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like Wendy makes it out of this episode…her students will probably have study hall all day tomorrow.
American Horror Story’s second season, “Asylum”, premiered last night with with more scares, sex, and mystery than ever. While returning cast members like Jessica Lange and Evan Peters are back in full creepy mode, there are many new faces to this season, which can only mean new characters to enter into the twisted world that is Ryan Murphy’s imagination. Among the new cast includes Maroon 5 front man Adam Levine! In honor of his smooth transition from the soulful crooner to brooding actor, we are recapping this season’s premiere episode with corresponding Maroon 5 songs because, come on, some of these dark characters might just need a bit of upbeat rhythm in their lives!