Posts By Jordan Runtagh

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Russell Brand Shaves Facial Hair, Signals Beard-Pocalypse

This has been a dark week for beard lovers around the world. Brad Pitt has parted with his scraggly facial hair, but we can pretty much all agree that was for the best. But now even Russell Brand has jettisoned his trademark scruff! Is this a sign of something bigger? Is this the first sign of the Beard-Pocalypse?

Apparently Russell shaved for his role in the remake of Arthur, so perhaps it isn’t the end of beards as we know it. But it is quite the change to Russell as we know him. Having recently trimmed his massive lion’s mane to a more manageable size, and lacking any trace of Jackie O rock-star sunglasses, this is the most we’ve ever seen of Russell’s face. Gaze upon it. What do you think? Do you prefer the clean shaven dapper dandy or the hirsute dark and menacing rocker?

[Photos: Splash News Online and Images]

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

A Look Back At Lindsay Lohan’s Horrendous Finger Nails

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We were so shocked by Lindsay Lohan’s manicured message at her court date that we decided to go back through our old pics -Da Vinci Code style- and see if there was anything else she was trying to tell us on her fingers. Sadly the trail went cold, but we did discover one thing: prior to her contempt of court, she showed a clear contempt of hygiene. At least where her chipped, gnawed and mangled nails were concerned. Although we guess it makes sense when you consider Lohan’s signature pose.

We know, it’s been a rough week for Lilo and we hate to kick her while she’s down. Plus we don’t want to trigger a “Leave Lindsay Alone” movement (anyone…? anyone…? Bueller?). So we’ll look on the bright side! Now that Lindsay is going to jail for 90 days, it’s the perfect time for her twin to restart her acting career! You know, the other girl in The Parent Trap? The sweet one, with the cute British accent! Wait, what? Really? That’s Lindsay too? You’ve gotta be kidding…We feel so betrayed.

We didn’t want to have to do this. But that’s what you get for playing with our hearts, Lindsay. Check out her passion for fugly nails in the gallery below.

[Photo: Getty Images and Splash News]

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

So This Is Happening: Javier Bardem Will Sing On Glee

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Javier Bardem will be the latest A-lister to pass through Glee’s revolving door of guest spots. No, he will not be reprising his Oscar-winning role as the shaggy-haired outburst-prone psychotic hitman from No Country For Old Men, because there’s already one Sue Sylvester. EW.com reports that he will instead be playing an international rock star who befriends the nerdy Artie Abrams. The two are even rumored to share a duet!

“We are going to rock the house,” Bardem assured EW, “We’re going to do some heavy metal-Spanish heavy metal, which is the worst.” He pitched the idea himself while being directed by the show’s creator Ryan Murphy in this summer’s Eat Pray Love. The Spanish heart-throb is apparently a hard-core Gleek after having watched the entire first season in week.

As much as we’re looking forward to seeing the smoldering leading man rock out in the McKinley High School auditorium, we can’t help but worry that all of the famous faces might distract from the story of the super talented students. Are the celebs simply icing on the cake, or is it coming dangerously close to shark-jumping? Let us know what you think, Gleeks!

[Photo: GettyImages]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

God Bless America: Holly Madison Hosts Star-Spangled Pool Party

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Holly Madison celebrated Independence Day by hosting a star-spangled pool party in her hometown of Las Vegas, Nevada. The shindig took place by the Wet Republic pool at the MGM Grand Hotel and Casino, a celeb cool spot where Lindsay Lohan, Audrina Patridge, and the newly bionic Heidi Montag have already splashed the day away.

The former star of The Girls Next Door and ex-member of Hef’s Girlfriend Squad tweeted about the event before hand, saying, “If u r in Vegas tomorrow come to my pool party at MGM’s Wet Republic! It’s gonna be hot!”

We tried to get there but sadly we couldn’t get a flight, so we had to be content burning our fingers on sparklers instead of playing “Marco Polo” with a Playboy Playmate. If you’re in the same boat, check the gallery below to see what you missed.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

James Cameron Presents Fergie’s Humps in 3D!

The Black Eyed Peas are teaming up with James Cameron for a concert film that will bring you Fergie’s humps in 3D! Will i. am told Vibe magazine that the band approached the Avatar director to make a multi-dimensional movie documenting their dates in South America.

“It’s a full-length film and it’s based around our tour activities,” he said, “We’ve toured from America and Europe, to the Middle East, South America, Asia and Africa. It’s not like we go, ‘Yo, we are international, you know what I’m saying? London and Paris!’ No, that’s just two cities. We want to go across the planet.”

“We have the biggest director because we are the biggest group on the planet,” said the not-singer of U2, the Rolling Stones, Radiohead or Coldplay. The film is scheduled for release in 2011 and has a plot line developed by Cameron, which will.i.am described as “dope”. It better be good, considering they turned down our idea of having a luxury liner full of blue aliens collide with one of Fergie’s lovely lady lumps and sink. Where’s the love, James?

[Photo: Images]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Kim Kardashian Unveils Hottest Candle Ever

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Kim Kardashian’s wax figure was unveiled at Madame Tussauds yesterday, causing millions of candles all over the world to feel insecure about their bodies. Kim spent days detailing the creation of the double on her blog and, apparently, it’s not at all similar to when Han Solo got sealed in carbonite (like we had assumed). The real Kim was on hand in New York to check out her completed likeness, which was dressed in a $1000 Herve Leger bandage dress and Christian Louboutin shoes. Naked candles across the country melted with jealousy.

Kim is the latest celeb to be immortalized by the Madame Tussauds Wax Museum, which recently welcomed Robert Pattinson, Miley Cyrus and RuPaul into their halls. But she feels that her new, waxy self is in good company. “I would love to hang out with Michael Jackson, Jennifer Lopez,” she told PopEater. “I saw Usher over there, Beyonce. Maybe Beyonce can teach me a dance or two!”

Were sisters Kourtney and Khloe jealous that they weren’t also tapped by Madame Tussauds? “No! They weren’t jealous, they were so excited for me! They were the first people I called when I found out that I was getting this honor.” It’s like a new Kardashian sister! Does the doppelganger hold a candle to the real thing? Let us know!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Jon Gosselin’s Dragon Tattoo: Uglier Than His Personality?

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We’ve seen some pretty horrific things on the internet, but not since “Two-Girls, One Cup” have we been this disturbed. Congrats Jon Gosselin, you’ve done it again.

To celebrate his spiritual growth and development, Mr. Gosselin had a massive dragon tattoo inked on his back, from his shoulders to the small of his back. His first move after the cosmic awakening was to sell the exclusive photos and interview to RadarOnline.com. It’s good to see that not everything – or anything – has changed.

Despite resembling the dragon from Mulan flying into a roid rage, it is actually a Korean symbol of rebirth. “I have planned this tattoo for years now, ” he told Radar. “I wanted something that resembled a rebirth or change in me.” This means that his official title is no longer “man-child,” but “man-newborn.”

The process required 14 hours at a Pennsylvania tattoo parlor. But the kids apparently “love it and think it’s cool!” We wonder if they’ll feel the same way at 3 AM when they wake up screaming at the thought of that beast hiding in their piles of reality TV money.

What’s all this about a rebirth, you ask? We’re not sure, but we think he means hiring a new manager and working with life coach Sylvia Lafair. “I have just completed Section Two of my Total Leadership Connection program,” Jon said. We have no idea what that means, but we’re sure it’s important step on the journey to becoming a legendary douche.

We shouldn’t make fun of him though, because it can’t be easy having eight kids. Nine, if you count his new girlfriend, Ellen Ross. Despite being eleven years her senior and having known each other for only two months, Jon’s manager told UsMagazine.com that he tattooed her name along with those of his children on the scroll clutched in the dragon’s claw. Is the huge dragon tattoo gesture romantic or overcompensation for Jon Gosselin’s legendary small penis? You decide.

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Courtney Love’s 20 Craziest Looks

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For months, Lady Gaga and Ke$ha have been competing to see who can don the kookiest duds, while Tila Tequila and The Situation are still locked in a battle to see who can flash the most orangey-day-glo skin while crossing the red carpet. Meanwhile, Lindsay Lohan and Amy Winehouse are trying to see who can be the first to make their liver flee their body in fear and, weirdly enough, Tom Cruise is cool again. There’s no denying it, being crazy is “in” this season! We even hear that it’s impossible to even get a table at a good restaurant in L.A. these days without dressing in a leather gimp suit, speaking Swahili, and tipping the maître d’ with bits of string. Hollywood is locked in an arms race of “crazy.”

So “crazy” is the new “black.” But while each celeb has their own go-to gimmick, Courtney Love outshines them all. As evidenced in the latest installment of Behind The Music, she is a true renaissance woman of crazy, not limiting herself to any one cheap shuck. And she’s been doing it wayyyy before it was cool. Yes, Courtney does “crazy” more, and she does “crazy” better. That’s why we love Courtney Love. Check out the salute to our favorite moments!

20. Flamenco Fatale

19. Mz. Frizzle

18. Sexy Substitute

17. The Morning After

16. First Lady Of Grunge

15. Super Sweet Sixteen

14. The Seven Year Itch

13. Penny Lane

12. The Situation

11. Esmeralda

10. Maypole Mama

9. Stop, Drop, Rock ‘n’ Roll

8. Zombie Cowgirl

7. Queen of Hearts

6. Gold ‘n’ Glittery

5. Velveteen Dream

4. Disney World Nightmare

3. The Malfunction

2. Royal Smoking Break

1. Psychedelic Puke

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

The 20 Most Notorious Celebrity Red Carpet Moves

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Everyone who’s anyone in Hollywood has their own signature red carpet move. For example, our red carpet move consists of not going to the red carpet. This is mainly because we’ve never been asked. But for celebs, their signature move is like their calling card! It’s a catch phrase for the body. You can see a signature move and immediately know who’s responsible for it. Spot a peace sign, and you know it’s attached to Miley‘s hand. That head of hair being combed by some gangly fingers? RPattz, obviously. And every time bare abs turn up on the carpet well – you don’t even have to ask.

We’ve all strutted in front of the mirror and pretended we’re at our first premiere, perfecting our signature red carpet move. (No? Just us? Oh well.) Check out these famous folks as they actually do it!

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

Leo DiCaprio Save Tigers (The Animal, Not The Golfer)

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Today Leonardo DiCaprio did the unthinkable and managed to get  the word “tiger” into headlines without  “golf” or “hookers” appearing anywhere near it. The Oscar-nominated actor has partnered up with the World Wildlife Foundation to create “Save Tigers Now,” an awareness campaign that aims to do just that. With less than 3,200 tigers left in the wild, the endangered species is teetering on the brink of extinction.

In recognition of 2010 being the Chinese Year of the Tiger, the organization seeks not only to raise $20 million for the protection of the feline, but also to double their population by the next Year of the Tiger in 2022.

“Tigers are endangered and critical to some of the world’s most important ecosystems,” said DiCaprio to the Daily Express, “Key conservation efforts can save the tiger species from extinction, protect some of the planet’s last wild habitats, and help sustain the local communities surrounding them. By protecting this iconic species, we can save so much more.”

Leo is currently in Asia doing first-hand research on the animal and their natural habitats. While there he also plans to participate in anti-poaching patrols and meet with guards assigned to protect tigers from international traffickers. This is the latest in a long line of environmental projects he has undertaken, including “The 11th Hour” documentary in 2007, and the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation.

Cool stuff. But then again, he is the King of the World.

[Photo: GettyImages]