Zac Efron is FLOATING! Watch out Criss Angel! Also, Zac’s taste in giant retail stores is spot on. Get it? I said “spot on.” In reference to Target’s brand. You’re welcome Target, now please can I have a $500 gift card? Thanks.
Question. If it’s cold enough for a ski cap, is it warm enough for a t-shirt? These are the great philosophical questions of our time.
Editor’s note: Michelle and Sara had the opportunity to sit down with each of the cast members of the new season of The Real World. Using their signature brand of tag-team tough-question journalism that comes from minutes of experience, the ladies dug deep into the psyches of the cast members. We will be bringing you interviews with each cast member over the coming days! The Real World: Brooklyn airs on Wednesdays at 10 p.m. on MTV. For constant stimulation, you can also check out RealWorldDailies.com.
Meet Ryan. If you’ve seen the premiere of the show, not only do you know that he was in the military and served time over in Iraq, but you also know that he plays the guitar, writes, and came to Brooklyn knowing very little about transgendered people. Overall, I found Ryan to be quite charming and adorable.
BWE: After 20 years of The RW what impact do you think the show has had on our culture? Keep it loose.
Ryan: I couldnâ€™t even tell you. I havenâ€™t even seen that many seasons.
BWE: Because you’re like 14 years old.
Ryan: Yes. I just turned 13. So I’m actually the youngest ever. I’ve got an awesome fake ID. Actually thatâ€™s a puzzling question. I havenâ€™t even seen past seasons so I couldnâ€™t even…
BWE: How old are you? 23?
Ryan: 23, yeah.
BWE: Okay. How sanitary is the RW house? Like if we took a blacklight to these couches what would we find?
Ryan: Probably dog piss. Oh and you’ll also find Devon’s hair or weave in the couches. I donâ€™t know which.
Anytime I’m browsing the headlines and I see a story about a panda, I usually click on it because I’m pretty confident it’s going to be something adorable. Well this time, imagine my surprise, to find it was a story about Gu Gu, a panda living in the Beijing Zoo, who “has tasted human blood for the third time.” I read that, thinking, okay it’s total hype, he just nipped at somebody innocently, it’s not like he did it intentionally..they just use salacious language like that to make it interesting…boy, was I wrong. Gu Gu is a bloodthirsty little demon who would like nothing more than to feast on the flesh of a human. Here is the exact description of each attack:
Today, when a man “jumped into the animal’s enclosure to retrieve his son’s toy…Gu Gu delivered deep bites to both of the man’s legs.”
“In 2007, the panda attacked a boy, 15, who had jumped into his enclosure, gnawing his legs to the bone.”
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag were out on the town recently. Heidi stopped into a Chanel store and got herself a very special manicure (i.e. Cha-nails). Meanwhile, Spencer was shooting “his new reality show based on Mixed Martial Arts fighter Kevin Casey.” Wait…what? Spencer is making a reality show? With the same tiny camera he used to make Heidi’s music video? AMAZING!!! Who is this Kevin Casey? Did he get a really bad concussion in a fight?
Atom has this new video (series? we can only hope) called Old People News, and it’s pretty much got all the bases covered when it comes to making fun of the elderly while also finding them adorable at the same time. They report the news from forwarded e-mails (naturally):
Old People News
Unwashed diet soda cans can cause diarrhea – and death!
Don’t forget, tonight is the night your life will be changed by a really intense new season of The Real World, this time set in really real-feeling Brooklyn! In this clip from RealWorldDailies.com, cast members Chet and Ryan discuss the difference between a wet dream and wetting the bed (among other genital things…language definitely NSFW):
The season premieres tonight on MTV at 11 p.m. And as we’ve mentioned, we have a lot of RW-related content coming your way, so stay tuned. If you don’t know why that is, then that means you missed our amazing tour of the RW house, which I have reposted (for the 34th time) after the jump.
An absolutely explosive story in the new issue of OK! claims that Britney Spears made a deal with the devil (i.e. her tour company’s insurance agency): in order to book her tour, the insurance company required she still be in conservatorship under her dad. And in order to do that, she had to give up the legal battle for her kids. So, using the transitive property, OK! determined that BRITNEY – KIDS = FAME. If they don’t get a Pulitzer for this story, they’ll at least get a Nobel Peace Prize for this headline:
I literally stared at this for about 10 minutes wondering if I was looking at something photoshopped. Am I the only one who thinks this headline makes NO sense?
CNN’s chief medical correspondent, Sanjay Gupta, has been approached to become our nation’s next Surgeon General. I used to think that the Surgeon General whose responsibilities include putting labels on cigarette packs and also, of course, performing operations on the president, as needed. Well apparently, it’s so much more! And who better to perform the duties under our new president than one of People magazine’s “Sexiest Men Alive”?
I really hope that when the phone rang, and Sanjay picked it up, all he heard on the other end was Barack Obama’s voice saying “Paging Dr. Gupta, paging Dr. Gupta, code red-white-and-blue! We need you at the White House, stat!” Ahem. I’m so so sorry I just wrote that.
Anyway, many are now arguing that Dr. Gupta is by far the sexiest Surgeon General we’ve ever had. Well, obviously they forgot about one incredibly sexy S.G. from the past!!! Find out who, after the jump.
Always has been running an ad recently for its new Infinity maxi-pad, and even though I know the very topic might disturb many of you, I had to share this with someone. First of all, I’ve always been grossed out and perplexed by tampon/pad commercials that compare your flow to blue water. There is nothing blue or water-like about getting your once-a-month. (Sorry! I know! T.M.I.!) But really…this commercial has to be addressed. Please watch:
Basically, this pad will absorb a goddamn OCEAN it’s so absorbent. It can hold “TEN TIMES ITS WEIGHT” in fluid. That’s really great, Always, but seriously…who wants to carry a virtual water balloon in their crotch? I’m trying to imagine a situation in which I would need my feminine product to carry that much liquid for ANY length of time. It’s called a bathroom: USE IT and CHANGE THAT SH*T…I don’t care if you have to roll up about 100 feet of toilet paper to use as a makeshift replacement.
Michael Phelps knows how to have a good time on the beach! Following his useful tips, you too can hit the beach and make everybody feel inadequate.