Posts By Saras

by

The Wine Rack: Discreet Alcoholism For The Classy Lady

I’ve always thought that the fourth hour of The Today Show is a bit like Michael Keaton’s fourth clone in Multiplicity: a sloppy hot mess that’s just not all there.

This morning there was a perfect example of this: Kathie Lee Gifford modeled for the audience a product that brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “drinking from the devil’s teat.” Take a look!

(Via DListed)

by

Hey Kids, Here’s How To Succeed In The Entertainment Biz

heyagentsdoyourjob.JPGAs expected, douchebaggery of colossal proportions saturated the most desperately pluggy Real World Reunion in history this weekend. The Real World XX: Hollywood cast members gathered round to prove they are stars, not racist, sober, normal and of course, incredibly successful.

I was impressed with Will’s emotionally sophisticated reaction to Janelle’s confrontation (i.e., putting on his sunglasses, making faces, asking her why she wasn’t talking about his album). Janelle claimed she didn’t want to be on camera as she dated Will during the season, even though as she is saying this, she is on camera, which is broadcasting live not only on television, but also into the middle of Times Square on a jumbotron.

But you know, all that sort of faded to the background because I COULDN’T STOP STARING AT THE MOST PATHETIC T-SHIRT OF ALL TIME, which read “HEY AGENTS, I ALSO DJ. DO YOUR JOB.” I…I’m speechless. I don’t think I can even respond to this without writing a full novel, so I’ll just say this. I’m now selling a new line of t-shirts in response to Will’s. Starting with this one:

willgod.JPG

See my other t-shirts, after the jump!

Read more…

by

While You Were Changing Your Name To Josh Brawlin

_44829555_brolin_afp226b.jpg

  • Josh Brolin got arrested for brawlin’ in a Shreveport, LA bar, along with actor Jeffrey Wright and several other people who were in town working on Oliver Stone’s George Bush biopic W. No one’s sure what started the fight, but I have a feeling it’s got something to do with the phrase “Who in the f*ck is Jeffrey Wright?” (CNN)
  • Brad and Angelina had their twins! They named them Knox Leon Jolie-Pitt and Vivienne Marcheline Jolie-Pitt, apparently by using the Soap Opera Name Generator. (Via Just Jared)
  • Katherin Heigl may have gotten herself in trouble for that comment about the Emmy’s - the word on the street is that her character Izzy is going to get killed off of Grey’s Anatomy. How? I’m guessing she accidentally falls and cracks her head open while trying to get a condom on McDreamy in the hospital elevator, in which they’ve been trapped for 14 hours because the power went out while trying to save 43 orphans who are trapped in the basement which is filling up with water after a tsunami hit the west coast, and oh, George gave her AIDS. It’s going to be a REALLY good episode. (Pink Is The New Blog)
  • Check out this photo gallery of celebrities and the Muppets they resemble. (TMZ)
  • Michael Jackson loves kids. New Kids, that is!!! HEYO! He’s planning on making a comeback with New Kids On The Block! (Via Mollygood)

by

Best Of The BWE: What Is…Sign Of The Apocalypse?

hills question on jeopardy2.jpg

by

SYTYCD Results: The Top 10 Revealed

ANI015.jpgFirst, let me begin by saying that on my second day as a 30-year-old, I have officially experienced my first senior moment, when I forgot to bring my pictures from the show with me to work. So (apparently I’m the only one on the internet who loves torture enough to spend the time to get them), instead of all those screen caps I normally provide, I will be using clipart to illustrate last night’s event. Carry on.

Things heated up last night, as The Top 10 – and more importantly, the group of dancers going on tour this fall* – were revealed last night on So You Think You Can Dance. Of course this continues the trend of seeing dancers you like in the bottom 3, but the upside is that we got to see better solo numbers in an otherwise relatively boring results show.

glow.jpgThe opening dance number was set to a Ne-Yo song, and incorporated the trend of wearing LED-lit outfits, causing the performers to glow in the dark. Fairly cool, and it totally reminded me of that movie from the 80′s called Special People, wherein this woman runs a black light theatre company for…special people. Anyone remember that besides me?

We also learn early on in the show that the popping battle is ON for the finale! Cat hinted at a behind-the-scenes concern about ratings when she said something about it being the only reason people might watch the finale. Nigel seemed a touch irritated by that and said “Well, they’ll watch the finale because of what the show IS, to find out who won.” YOU IDIOT!

See the results, and more clipart, after the jump!

Read more…

by

Operation Cry-Town: Defective Ceiling Tile Edition

It’s no secret that I am POWERLESS against the single tear of a salamander…so today, when I randomly clicked on this video…at first, I thought it was a Geico commercial. But I had NO IDEA I WAS ABOUT TO ENTER INTO THE DARK AND DRAMATIC WORLD OF TINY LIZARD LOVE TORN APART BY POWERS GREATER THAN US ALL.

They reach out for each other in their own pools of blood…WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY?????

by

The Rapid Spread Of Wal-Martaphentitis Across The United States

Some guy who has a LOT of spare time on his hands, and really hates Wal-Mart, made this animated map showing the spread of Wal-Mart stores across America. When I’m watching it, I’m not gonna lie, I get a chill in my bones. When this kind of thing happens in movies, they usually have to make a decision to blow up the nation.

walmartspread.jpg

The scary part is, this clearly does not reflect all the stores, because most of the Northeast is empty through at least 2007. He obviously missed a lot – because I know first hand that Virginia DEFINITELY caught the disease long ago. And try not to mess yourself when this “flurry” of dots happens at the very end. According to the map-maker, this indicates stores that have yet to open. (Oh, and push the little red “minus” sign, to see Hawaii and Alaska.)

(Via Eliot on Buzzfeed)

by

…OF THE DAY

simpson0710_1.jpg

  • OPEN WIDE! HERE COMES A BULLET: Jessica Simpson celebrates her 28th birthday with new brother-in-law, Pete Wentz, and that other Simpson girl. (Webster’s Is My B*tch)
  • ROCK-ABYE-BABY THE VOTE: In this new video for Rock The Vote, Christina Aguilera tries to erase the whore-paint years with patriotism, gentle-singing, soft-curls, and her newborn child. (ONTD)
  • OH, WHERE TO BEGIN: Former MLB player and Surreal Life cast member Jose Conseco stated today that Madonna hit on him in 1991, offering to pay him to leave his wife, so that he could impregnate her. Maybe he was just having a dream like Wayne & Garth did? (Mollygood)
  • JAMIE LYNN’S BABY IS DRUH-UNK: It must run in the family, because Jamie Lynn’s baby girl is showing herself to be quite the party girl, already. (Holy Taco)
  • JESSICA WANTS JUSTIN TO KNOW THAT THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO PRESSURE TO GET MARRIED. REALLY, IT’S TOTALLY FINE: Jessica Biel told Harper’s Bazaar that she’s all about just chilling out with her soulmate. Suuuuuuure. (UsMagazine)

by

The Real World Is Way More Real On The Internet

If you’re looking for that extra nudge you need to commence your own impending downward spiral, I recommend spending some time on RealWorldDailies.com. This website includes hundreds of videos of uncut footage from The Real World XX: Hollywood, without censorship or editing. However, if you’re looking to remain mentally alert and heart healthy, we have gathered the best moments found on the site, JUST FOR YOU! In memory of this insane season of The Real World:

5 Things We Discovered On Real World Dailies Dot Com (NSFW)