Britney Spears – who is supposedly on the verge of a comeback because she lost some weight, improved her weave and hasn’t talked in a British accent in a while – will release a new album on her December 2, her 27th birthday. The album is appropriately titled Circus – you know, because her life is totally just like one. We think it would have been easier to call it I Look LIke A Motherf*ckin’ Clown, Ya’ll. But what do we know, we only spend 19 hours a day thinking about BritBrit. Her first single is called “Womanizer,” and drops next Monday, September 22nd. If it doesn’t sound like a robot, we’ll be quite impressed! [Us]
[Photo: Getty Images and Splash News Online]
The rumor that Alicia Keys got between producer Swizz Beatz (pictured above, together in 2004) and his wife Mashonda is heating up, and confusing all of us who believe in her good girl, great voice image. This is Alicia Keys were talking about, she’s basically a saint with a piano and a couple of bad outfits under her belt (and hey, doesn’t she have some serious boyfriend?). Even those Swizz is denying any infidelity, he supposedly threw Alicia a birthday party, where she introduced him as “The man of the hour and my boo.” A friend of his ex blabbed that Mashonda thought the pair was working things out: “She thought they were trying to put their marriage back together. Meanwhile, he’s apparently been telling Alicia that his marriage was over.”
But we’ll let Swizz have the final word. He’s now speaking out in an attempt to defend Alicia and clear his name, of course. He tells Us: “I am disappointed that some have chosen to try and tarnish Alicia’s reputation by irresponsibly implicating her in a situation that she has absolutely nothing to do with.”
So – who do you think is telling the truth? [Photo: WireImage]
Sobriety has made Lindsay Lohan way confident: the Long Island lolita recently lashed out at a photographer and then destroyed Sarah Palin on her MySpace blog – all in the same day. And people say she isn’t working anymore! According to TMZ, LiLo (who was gabbing on her cell phone at the time) tripped over a barricade while walking into the Bowery Hotel in NYC, and then turned around and punched a photographer in the face. She announced into her Blackberry, “Oh my God, I just hit a paparazzi.” She seems to have done it for no good reason, too. Bad ass! Cops were called to the scene, but no one pressed charges – this time.
Linds (and her girlfriend Samantha Ronson) then took to her trusty ol’ MySpace blog to angrily pound her iBook keys about her latest enemy, vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin. Simply put, Lindsay and Sam rip her a new a-hole, on everything from drilling to gay rights:
Is it a sin to be gay? Should it be a sin to be straight? Or to use birth control? Or to have sex before marriage? Or even to have a child out of wedlock? I find it quite interesting that a woman who now is running to be second in command of the United States, only 4 years ago had aspirations to be a television anchor. Which is probably all she is qualified to be…
And of course, our favorite part:
Oh, and…Hint Hint Pali Pal- Don’t pose for anymore tabloid covers, you’re not a celebrity, you’re running for office to represent our, your, my COUNTRY!
Hmmm – this reminds us of a joke we heard once – something about the difference between Lindsay Lohan and a pitbull. If only we could remember the punchline. [Photo: WireImage]
J.Lo bailed on serving as the guest judge on the Project Runway due to a foot injury, so Tim Gunn kindly stepped in to do her job. J.Lo’s foot – we thank you! [DListed]
Pete Wentz tries to hide from Ashlee Simpson in a shoddy disguise. You can’t get out of fatherhood that easy! [Seriously? OMG!]
Katie Holmes goes back to basics – leggings. [Jezebel]
Madonna did a little bit of dancing and a whole lot of vag flashing at her concert. [BWE.tv]
Funny guy – and presidential nominee – Barack Obama is putting in a little cameo action on Saturday Night Live this weekend. [Hollyscoop]
[Photo: Getty Images]
Um, judging from her appearance last night in at her DJing gig in Camden, we think not. [Photos: Splash News Online, FilmMagic]
Pink is reportedly checking out Scientology at the urging of pal Juliette Lewis, as a way to help heal her heart following her divorce. A source says, “Pink is in the beginning stages of checking out the religion, but she has taken to it and she wants to get more involved.” If she starts wearing pegged jeans, we know she’s in serious trouble. [SFGate. Photo: Getty Images]
Billions of people change car tires every single day. But when Tony Romo does it, the world stops, volcanoes erupt with doves, and the seas shimmer with waves of gold. Jessica Simpson‘s trapped boyfriend pulled over to help a middle-aged couple deal with their blown tire in Texas recently, and their reaction is well, priceless or pathetic, depending on how evil a person you are. Stranded motorist Sharon White details her and her husband Bill’s encounter with the football player:
“Bill was fooling with that tire, and I was standing beside the car watching him. The next thing I know, a nice-looking young man, very well-dressed, but with something strange on his chin, he walked up, smiled, and said, ‘Hey, you need some help?”
Sharon continued: “I did something no 50-year-old woman should be doing, but I screamed real loud, and then jumped up and hugged him.
Her husband Bill also freaked out: “Look, we’re driving a 10-year old car that is sitting in a parking lot with a flat tire in the dead of night. He could tell by that we’re nothing special. But here’s a young man making millions of dollars, and he’s got all this fame and glory, and he does this?” He added, “This was a good person we met. A good person with small-town values despite all the big-city fame and fortune.”
So there you have it folks. Tony Romo might as well be God, which would make Jessica Simpson’s preacher pop pretty happy, right? [NFL Fanhouse. Photo: Getty Images]
Ugh. Have you ever seen a couple that looks this unhappy to be around each other? The only things Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake have in common are the giant bugs residing up both their asses and their pissy faces that put two-year olds to shame. But there might be a minute of happiness in their sourpuss lives coming up – as Justin Timberlake apparently was caught revealing at Fashion Week that he’s thisclose to become Mr. Jessica Biel! yes, some well-dressed spy spotted JT and revealed that he “said that he is ‘this close to being married’ and then pinched his fingers together to demonstrate.”
The singer was showing his fashion line (who knew?) in NYC this week, and the pair hit up his restaurant Southern Hospitality on Wednesday night for a romantic dinner of angry glares and short, tense conversation. Love never looked so uncomfortable. [OK! Photo: Splash News Online]
The rich folks who inhabit the tony brownstones and condo developments of the West Village just can’t handle the fame whoring ways of the Olsen twins. Apparently they’re angry that Mary-Kate and Ashley leave their giant SUVs running outside their home (just in case they need to make a late night trip to Beatrice, obviously) and are accusing them of terrorizing the hood with their two giant bodyguards. “You would think there was a government operation going on,” whines a neighbor.
The same crybaby just doesn’t get why the Olsens can’t just get in line like all the other discreet famous people who call the hood their home. “Plenty of other celebrities around this block [Sarah Jessica Parker, Liv Tyler, Gisele Bundchen and Julianne Moore] are good neighbors and blend in with the neighborhood – but these two are invaders.”
Pssst – Liv Tyler is boring. Don’t try to cage the Olsen twins in, friend. Those little birds need to fly (and pound a bottle of Jack Daniels a night). [NYPost. Photo: FilmMagic]