Posts By Kate Spencer

by (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Katie Can’t Handle Her Pants

Martha Stewart‘s arm appears to be missing, but like all good WASPS she keeps her cool. []

Katie Holmes unrolled her giant jeans! All is right in the world again. [DListed]

Kanye West was spotted today at GAP’s headquarters, probably pitching a fit about his khakis. [Jezebel]

We love Laverne from I Want To Work For Diddy almost as much as she loves giving some random dude a lap dance. [YBF]

Gwen Stefani‘s back is hollerin’ from carrying that baby around. Pop already! [Seriously? OMG!]

Mary-Kate Olsen finally got subpoenaed by the feds. Ask her about those ugly gladiator sandals, guys! [ICYDK]

Beyonce rocks Obama pride while hugging her hubby. [ConcreteLoop]

10 dirty hippies that ladies love to bone. What, you didn’t know BO was an aphrodisiac? [Defamer]

[Image: Getty]

by (@katespencer)

Morgan Freeman Splits From Wife After 24 Years

Dark Knight star and recent car accident survivor Morgan Freeman is currently divorcing his wife of 24 years, Myrna Colley-Lee. The pair actually separated in December 2007, but had not gone public with the break-up until now. Freeman is currently hospitalized for the broken arm and elbow he sustained in his crash. This is just the most recent addition to a growing list of unfortunate events (like, uh, Heath Ledger‘s death and Christian Bale‘s verbal smackdown) that’s currently trailing the Batman flick. While some may chalk it up to a “curse,” we’d beg to differ, and not just because we’re from Boston where “curse” is the second word babies learn after Bambino. The simple truth: bad sh*t happens to everyone, even people with lots of money. In fact, it happens all the time. (See: Britney Spears. Also: all of Hollywood.)

Our theory – Freeman’s wife got sick of watching her hubby waste his talent on cop movies with Ashley Judd. That’d drive any reasonable human to divorce. [Us. Image: Getty]

by (@katespencer)

Lauren Conrad Makes The Hills A Crappy Place To Live

Residents of Lauren Conrad‘s tony Los Angeles neighborhood are like, dunzo with the Hills star, accusing her of bringing drama to their hood that doesn’t involve Audrina f*cking an illiterate hairdresser. A herd of paparazzi, partying pals, and stalking fans hungry for Lauren and her followers have infested the nabe, and residents are starting to get a little pissed off. Complaints range from the legitimately scary: “several paparazzi began fighting and one pulled a knife on the other one,” to the whiniest bullsh*t this side of the ferry to Martha’s Vineyard: ” Lights are left on in there 24/7, so you wonder if anyone is sleeping.”

There’s nothing quite like rich people complaining about stuff. About thirty neighbors signed a petition insisting that the city revoke The Hills filming permit and in it, “complained that the show’s production workers served food to the paparazzi and placed a port-a-potty in front of Conrad’s house for their use.” Sounds like they should stop their whining and stock up on the free bagels. [LA Times. Image: Splash News]

by (@katespencer)

Scarlett Slams The Media For Fantasizing About Her And Obama

Scarlett Johansson has opened her mouth again, and thankfully this time it’s not to sing. Woody’s muse is speaking out against the media’s recent obsession with her emails to Barack Obama, and their frenzied reaction and exaggeration of their e-lationship. And she makes a good point, one that the candiate she chose not to support may agree with. “It seemed to me to be like a product of extreme sexism,” ScarJo said, “and I kept thinking to myself, ‘God, if this was just, like, Kal Penn or George Clooney or any of the other [Obama] surrogates or supporters … there wouldn’t be [any] question about it. Nobody would even talk about it.”

To clarify, if George Clooney was sending Barack Obama adoring emails, we’d be the first to gush about it and blow the notes significance way out of proportion. But yes, ScarJo’s got a point. No one’s ever accused Ben Affleck of trying to bone all the politicians he drools over. Sadly, the media’s obsession with a hot chick emailing a politician got in the way of them actually covering the unique thing she’s accomplished – being a politically active young person. Besides, everyone knows she’s into Penelope Cruz anyway. [ET]

Check out photos of Scarlett and Penelope at the Los Angeles premiere of Woody Allen‘s  Vicky Cristina Barcelona.

[All Photos: Getty Images]

by (@katespencer)

Jenna Jameson Pregnant With Embarrassed Baby

Porn master and plastic skeleton Jenna Jameson is knocked up with her first kid. The proud papa is Tito Ortiz, who does that freaky Ultimate Fighting crap. “She’s completely thrilled, this is something she’s wanted for a very long time,” says a pal of the porn princess. Jameson has miscarried with her ex-husband, and failed at in vitro fertilization, so she must be overjoyed. And hey, so are we! This kid is either going to kick ass or flaunt it, sealing it’s destiny as an American legend before it’s even born. Congrats guys! [NYP]

[Image: Getty]

by (@katespencer)

Jen & John Running Down The Aisle

Here’s an idea, world – maybe Jennifer Aniston is happy being single. Did anyone ever think about that? Maybe she enjoys just dating a hot 29-year old with tattoo sleeves, kicking him out of her bed whenever she wants so she can enjoy sleeping alone in her clean sheets. Perhaps she is perfectly content running out to do yoga in the morning, without having to drag her bratty kids to preschool beforehand. What the hell is so wrong with that?

But, blah blah blah, she’s allegedly obsessed with getting married, because we’re obsessed with her getting married. The country has become a pair of whiny old people and Jennifer Aniston is our single granddaughter who we so desperately want to wed off. But hey, she might be doing it with John Mayer, in a relaxed, backyard celebration! Courtney and CoCo Cox will be her wedding party, and everything will be perfect. We couldn’t be more excited – or relieved. [Ok!]

by (@katespencer)

Paris Hilton for President

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

We had all but forgotten about Paris Hilton – her BFF’s gone off and had a baby, she’s dating a dude with zero Greek ancestry/inheritance and we now get our skin fix from Miley Cyrus. But just when we were about to count her out, she goes and does something kinda awesome. After being called out in a John McCain ad as a “celebrity,” Paris bites back with the help of the Funny Or Die dudes and actually demonstrates that she may just have a sense of humor about the whole thing. And you know what that means – good PR for her. I guess we do still care about Paris after all.

by (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Pam’s Got The Munchies

Pam Anderson eats fake meat in public – no, not her boobs.  [DListed]

Enjoy your daily dose of the Kardashian sisters in cheesy outfits.  [ICYDK]

The new ad for the upcoming season of America’s Next Top Model reveals the dawning of the age of Tyraquarius.  [Seriously? OMG!]

Kate Moss wants you to look at her boobs.  [IDLYITW]

Gossip Girl Taylor Momsen is wicked skinny, yo.  [ONTD]

Da Brat might be going to jail for a year. Who will Mariah hang out with?!  [Bossip]

Anderson Cooper disses Ali Lohan. Swoon.  [Jezebel]

by (@katespencer)

The Jonas Brothers Are Virginal Douchebags

Perez Hilton recently revealed that tween stars Selena Gomez and Nick Jonas both gave details of their first date to different mags (without mentioning the other’s name), essentially outing their secret relationship. Their accounts are as follows:

  • Selena: “I had dinner on the beach with a crush and there were lights on the palm trees! Then, went walking on the beach, and after that we slow danced. Wait, it gets better. While we were slow dancing…my crush and I had our first kiss! And after it, I leaned back and I said, ‘You cheated.’ And he said, ‘Why’ and I said, ‘I don’t kiss on the first date.’ Then he said, ‘Well, I never really play by the rules.’ I was waiting for a a director to say, ‘Cut’ I was like, ‘Are we shooting this right now?”
  • Nick: “On one date, the girl said to me, ‘I don’t kiss on the first date.’ So I said, ‘I don’t follow the rules.'” The brothers high-five to that one. “Ooooh! It was so good!”

Nauseating, yes – especially for fifteen year olds. Do you think they know the romance dies by the time you turn 17? Regardless, that mushiness is not the part that made our stomach crawl – this is: “The brothers high-five to that one.” Really, Jonas brahs? You guys clinked purity rings to that? You can’t hide behind those innocent faces and gentle curls – you’ve outed yourselves as G-rated douchebags (PS – your career will all be over when your fans turn 13 and get depressed and start listening to emo. Cherish this while it lasts!) .

by (@katespencer)

Wardrobe Malfunction: Katie’s Jean Joke

Someone (Suri? Oprah? The ghost of L. Ron Hubbard?) needs to inform Katie Holmes that, despite her pixie cut and new Big Apple lifestyle, she just ain’t Audrey Hepburn. Nor is she Molly Ringwald, though we’re sure any of her precocious 80’s characters would love Katie’s cuffed jeans (Wish we could say the same about her boobs! 16 Candles zing!).

Just in case Katie is checking out Scandalist while on break from her rehearsals, we’d thought we’d create a handy list of what we adore/abhor about her outfit so she could make the appropriate changes asap.

We love:

  • That she seems to only own one pair of those distressed roller jeans, which means that either Tom has cut her off from the cash or she’s not confident enough in her fashion sense to buy 50 more pairs.

We hate:

  • The very obvious attempt at starting a trend, after a stylist surely insisted she do so.
  • Her super short hair – precious on some (Selma Blair, for starters), severe on robots.
  • The Ed Westwick styled scarf. Because it is hot outside, and if it were not, that scarf would do nothing to protect from the cold (much less an appearance on a Worst Dressed List).

[Photos: Getty]