Remember ol’ crazy face Sam Lutfi? You know, the BritBrit hanger on who alleged drugged up the diva in an attempt to control her? Yes, that winner. After Britney’s parents filed a strict restraining order against Sam, he’s been nowhere to be found, probably because he’s been busy working double shifts at Denny’s. But apparently Sam is back on the scene and ready to fight the restraining order that’s kept him away from Britney, her pill supply and her credit cards since February 1st. A hearing is scheduled for tomorrow to address whether the restraining order should be made permanent, and Sammy’s supposedly coming to fight!
“Sam won’t sign a permanent stay-away,” says a source nuts enough to be friends with the guy. “If they want to go to trial, he will go to trial. He did nothing wrong.” Oh come on, dude. We all saw her weave for those six months of friendship. He did A LOT wrong. Like, 3000 plastic hairs worth of damage.
Let’s pour one out for the latest random Hollywood couple to call it quits. Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong have ended their magical love affair. It’s shocking, considering all the things they had in common, like their bank accounts and…their money. They were practically the same person! Still, we are relieved to know that there is now animosity or anger between the two, says a pal, “just sadness.”
We know who’s not sad right now – the single celebs standing in line waiting to date these two. Drew Barrymore and Justin Long just broke up, wouldn’t it be fun if they each rebounded with Lance and Kate? They’re all running out of famous people to bone and they gotta get their drama fix from somewhere! [Us]
Bimbo turned bimbo/country singer Jessica Simpson has released the cover of her new album on her website. Apparently all chicks in the country lounge around on wooden benches in $1000 dresses wasting their sweet summer days practicing their favorite ‘desperate face’ pose. It’s a good look for her! It almost makes us forget that underneath, she’s a rich divorcee who makes a living hawking cheap shoes and acne cream.
The title of her album has obviously been shortened down from some longer, super-dumb question our gal Jess has asked along the way.
Do you know why John Mayer dumped me?
Do you know what my sister’s phone number is? She seems to have changed it without telling me.
Do you know if fat free cheese still has fat in it?
Do you know when I can take these smelly cowboy boots off?
Heidi Montag is moving out of Hollywood (yay!) to escape “the drama.” Sadly, she hasn’t yet realized she’s normally the one to cause all the cat-fighting. But you know, it’s hard being that self-absorbed. Heidi and her man-beast Spencer Pratt are searching for a house in the $15 million range, which means they’re gonna have to stage a lot of bikini pics to save up! That or sell 15 million crappy tank tops from her junk fashion line. Either way, it will probably take them a few years – they’ve blown all their cash on lip injections, after all.
Heidi knows her price range is “a little bit expensive,” but says “we want to get one house where we want to stay and build a family in.” Just the thought of these two “building” some babies makes us vomit harder than Shia LeBeouf after a night of binge drinking. Eek.
Amy Winehouse headed back to her home away from home last night – the hospital. The singer was packed up in an ambulance and whisked off as her dad looked on and friend Remi Nicole freaked out. The doctors released Amy this morning, and her dad summed up the drama, saying, “She’s fine, she just mixed up her medication.’
The summer of 2008 is almost over (yes, it’s time to buy school clothes again), so let’s celebrate the few blissful weeks we have left with an homage to the best celebrity bikini bods to grace the beach since June. The days are long and the thongs are short – just the way summer life should be.
Put down that Dark Knight ticket down and get clicking instead. You’ll be able to enjoy Aaron Eckhart‘s f*cked up face on DVD in just a few months, but summer – and those summer booties – only come around once a year.
In the pics below Naomi Campbell steals a kiss, Claire Danes snaps a pic, and Brooke Hogan poses – all while practically naked!
Britney Spears is on vacation this week in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, with hotelier George Maloof. Because, you know, being a little bit less insane is seriously hard work.
But for reals – Brit looks pretty good! We don’t see any daiquiri stains on her white bikini yet, surely that is a good sign. We like that her friend is filming the pool party with a giant video camera from 1984. All Brit needs is a couple more tequila shots, and that sex tape is finally gonna happen.
It’s such a relief to know that Lauren Conrad is not a “tortured soul.” Apparently we’re the only ones tormented by her mascara-stained tear fests and alleged 8 hour work days spent in 6 inch Louboutin heels. Hell, we’re surprised Lauren has a soul at all – we thought she sold it to get that pathetic fashion line. More LCisms coming at you on August 5th in CosmoGirl. [via FadedYouth]
Where’s LaBeouf? Why, he’s busy ruining that perfect little Hollywood career by getting piss drunk, hopping in your car and crashing into another driver while attempting a left hand turn at 3AM. Shia LaBeouf rolled his car early Sunday morning and seriously busted up his hand, resulting in a hospital visit, surgery and a one-month hiatus from filming Transformers 2. Oh – and of course, a felony DUI. The Beef was arrested last November after he wandered into a Chicago Walgreens all drunk and refused to leave. Obviously, he’s one classy dude.
The Beefster is trying to tell us something: he doesn’t want to be rich and famous, he wants to end up working at a Dunkin Donuts by the time he’s thirty so he can reattempt a career one day on some sh*tballs reality TV show. F*ck Michael Bay and Transformers! Shia wants to be just like the entire cast of Diff’rent Strokes – so far, he’s on his way!
That’s video of Shia’s overturned car above. It’s a regular PSA on why not to be a drunk douchebag, don’t ya think? After the jump, Shia’s mug shot …