Posts By VH1

by VH1

Douche Clubber Sues Douche Author

Michael Minelli (no relation to Liza), a 27-year-old club promoter, has filed a libel suit against the author and publisher of coffee-table-must-have Hot Chicks With Douchebags. Mikey! (what his friends assumingly call him) appears on page 202 of the book and claims that the inclusion of his photograph in the book has subjected him to “hatred, contempt, and humiliation” and has resulted in “friends, acquaintances, coworkers, employees, and strangers alike calling him a ‘douchebag.’” Umm, ya. It WASN’T the tribal armband tat, spiked hair and Westside sign you through up in every picture. D-bag!

Douchebag Author Jay Louis noted that Minelli’s “popped-collar, spikey-haired presence was so far beyond regular douche, so far beyond uberdouche, he could spontaneously create a new element on the periodic tables–Douche Nine.” This description unfortunately brings us no closer to distinguishing said douche in the sea of tanning oil and V05 hair gel in the pic above.

C’mon guys, can’t we be grown ups and settle this with a good-old-fashioned Jager bomb and chest slap?

Douchebag Word Count: 11. Score!

For a douchebag (12!) flashback, check out an old fave after the jump. (Warning: NSFW). — Evan G.

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by VH1

Barack Obama: He’s Just Like Us (Maybe Even Nerdier!)

So while President-elect Barack Obama gets to know the White House and fixes that pesky economy problem, a reporter over at the Telegraph compiled a list of “50 Facts You Might Not Know” about him. Turns out, Obama maybe the coolest uncool President we’ve ever had. Check it:

  • Geek Check! Obama collects Spider-Man and Conan the Barbarian comics. No word on whether he was as disappointed in Spiderman 3 as we were.
  • Barack Obama was known as “O’Bomber” at high school for his basketball skills. Umm, glad the McCain campaigners didn’t get a hold of this one earlier.
  • Barack Obama has read all the Harry Potter books. Could explain his “Cloak Of Invisibility” Exit Strategy for Iraq.
  • As a teen, Obama worked in a Baskin-Robbins. Now, he can’t stand ice cream. This is perhaps the only time we’re OK calling him Un-American.

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by VH1

Barack the Merchandise

President-elect Barack Obama will not only go down in history as the first African-American president (we’re still beaming), but also for his progressive marketing (including the works of artist Shepard Fairey) and online initiatives that have proven that you can be creative AND effective. Mindblowing!

And while the rest of the world is applauding our progressive decision, at home we’re patting our own backs for making history — and making products! Because it wasn’t just the Barack camp the got creative — Americans are nothing if not opportunistic. Here’s just a few of the ways Obama fans show their um, love — from the beautiful to the downright bizarre. — Evan G

Bonus: Barack Rolled = Tee Hee

This Internet phenomenon just keeps on rick-rolling. And we just keep on laughing.

by VH1

Brooke Hogan Should Never Wear These Hot Pants Again

Brooke Hogan, the epitome of peroxided beauty in Florida, hosted a “Sexy Schoolgirl Party” this weekend wearing thigh-high leather boots and hot pants that looked like a display case for her private part. In fact, whenever we think of Brooke Hogan in the near future we’ll have no choice but to think … “cameltoe.”

The party featured a contest for “best dressed schoolgirl.” Brooke, dear, wear a red plaid skirt next time. …

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by VH1

Keeley Hazell Strips Down For Playstation 3

Playstation 3 has launched it’s new off-road racing game (MotorStorm Pacific Rift), and it hired English model Keeley Hazell to help out. Let’s see if she has all the right stuff to be a video game/car racing pinup girl.

  • Daisy Duke shorts? Check.
  • Long legs? Check.
  • Cleavage to spare? Check.
  • Playboy spread? Bonus!

Turns out, Keeley has more than the necessary ingredients — and we haven’t even mentioned her leaked sex tape. After the jump, a Keeley Hazell stripper video. [Photo: Getty Images]

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by VH1

Top 10 Diss Songs In Pop Music

With a raspberry and plenty of nyah nyah nyahs, “So What” has put Pink back where she belongs — on top of the charts. And so what, indeed, to her ex-husband Carey Hart, referred to in unfavorable terms throughout the song. Pink isn’t the only one to turn her pain into artistic profit. As Kid Rock explains in “Half Your Age,” “You thought I was just gonna sit back and take it on the chin / But honey, I’m a songwriter …” Here are ten other tracks that prove revenge is a dish best set to music. — Charles Bottomley

10. “Survivor” (2001)

Slingin’ mud: Destiny’s Child, multi-platinum for Beyonce Knowles and other hirelings.

Smeared! LeToya Luckett and LaTavia Roberson, who were unceremoniously booted from the band in 2000.

Ouch! “You thought I wouldn’t sell without you / Sold nine million.”

See you in court? Oh yes. Luckett and Roberson sued Beyonce and her father manager, claiming the lyrics violated a confidentiality agreement.

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by VH1

Middle Schoolers Punished For ‘Hit A Jew Day’

With a plot straight out of a South Park episode, sixth graders from a middle school located in the St. Louis area (see map above) are facing punishment after starting a “Hit a Jew Day” at school — a pretty small target in a town like St. Louis. Apparently, the students were participating last week in an innocent-enough “Spirit Week” when their “Hug a Friend Day” quickly became a Semite slap-down under the leadership of some misguided, snarky pre-teens.

While the injuries were minimal (one student was allegedly slapped in the face, others were tapped on the shoulder and taunted) and the punishments quick and fair (suspension and counseling for those who actually laid the smack down, lesser punishments for the taunters) all the kids in the school were called into an assembly led by the principal.

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by VH1

Cannibalism Never Tasted Better!

We at Scandalist appreciate anyone with a sense of humor — especially one who can inject said humor into their mundane job and even more so if that job is designing eye-catching broccoli packaging for the masses! Check out this extreme close-up of Cascadian Farm Gourmet Organic Broccoli Florets.

Bravo! We are equal parts creeped out and entertained. We’re pretty sure this isn’t the only “green” these designers dabble in. Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge. Oh and maybe we’ve been watching too much SNL — and loving it! — but does the third picture look like Tina Fey with a Fred Armisen haircut? Just sayin’. — Evan G.

by VH1

The Scandalist Scoop: Tuesday, Oct. 21

TMZ

So Lil’ Wayne had a hearing in his weapons case in New York today — big deal. But here’s the fun part: Our guy in the courtroom says everyone got an impromptu Marijuana 101 lesson in the process. The Weez’s assistant was up on the stand today and under blunt questioning from the DA, explained in great detail how pot is “something we always have” on the tour bus. Wayne’s bud also said the star only smokes “dro” — which, as the assistant explained, is short for “hyDROponically grown” weed (i.e., the good s**t). The court was, we’re told, buzzing.

Weeks before her hubby David Duchovny checked into sex addiction rehab and two months before revealing they were already separated — Téa Leoni enjoyed some VIP treatment from rumored boyfriend Billy Bob Thornton. On August 4th, Tea was on hand for Billy Bob’s 53rd birthday to watch him record a song at Sun Studios in Memphis. Two weeks later, the 42-year-old mother of two enjoyed a beer and a cig (right) at Billy’s show with his band, The Boxmasters, in NYC.

The Daily Beast

The Lost Madonna Tapes

More than two decades ago in a Queens basement, Madonna recorded music that’s never before been released. Listen to it in a Daily Beast exclusive by Andrew Morton.

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by VH1

The Scandalist Scoop: Monday, Oct. 20

New York Post

MADGE GETS SON-BURNED

The biological father of Madonna’s adopted son said his boy might be “better off” with him in Malawi now that the Material Mom is headed for Splitsville. “I am still a poor farmer with nothing to offer, but maybe he would be better off back with us,” said Yohane Banda, little David Banda’s natural dad.

SAMANTHA Ronson deserves a medal for putting up with gal pal Lindsay Lohan. The two took the Acela train to Washington on Thursday and “had a quiet fight” the whole time, our spy says. Lohan spent most of the time complaining about her staff and told Ronson, “I do what’s good for you, not what’s best for both of us.” Lohan was “whining incessantly and Samantha was trying to deflect it. When Lindsay would get up, Samantha would sigh and put her sweatshirt hood back up.” At one point, it escalated to Lohan telling Ronson, “Don’t (bleeping) lie to me!”

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