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Cannes Craziness: Is Elizabeth Banks Trying Too Hard?

If Elizabeth Banks has been trying to get our attention, she’s certainly succeeding. The star of comedies like Role Models, Zack & Miri Make A Porno and The 40 Year Old Virgin has consistently worn the most dramatic outfits at the Cannes Film Festival this week, ranging from a strawberry swirl of a gown at the Poetry premiere to a blue blast of sparkle-motion at Wednesday’s Armani party to the backless studded marvel above at yesterday’s Artists For Peace & Justice benefit. Should Elizabeth give it a rest or are you loving her flamboyance? Check out our gallery from last night’s charity bash and  let us know in our TheFABLife poll.

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Liza Minnelli Is An Embarrassing Family Member

Apparently, the movie Sex and the City 2 includes Liza Minnelli doing a cover of Beyonce’s All the Single Ladies. You are about to hear exactly what it would sound like if you took your great aunt to a Karaoke bar and she got drunk embarrassing-family-member-style. From Edith Zimmerman over at the Vulture blog by New York Magazine:

“Yes, Liza, you sounded great.  Now put down your gimlet and let’s get you home.”

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Rumors We Love: Tom Forcing Katie To Dance, Seeks “Ginger & Fred” Status

Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes

At this point, OK! should really call itself OK, Whatever! But as long as their rumors are as crazy as this one, we’re not complaining. According to the Robsten stalkers, Tom Cruise has forced Katie Holmes into near-daily dance practices following TomKat’s notorious “Whatever Lola Wants” number at a benefit performance in LA earlier this month. Apparently, Tom feels a) that America wants more of that sexy action and b) Katie’s the one who needs some work. “Tom wants them to be the new Ginger Rogers & Fred Astaire,” says the mag’s source. “He loves the idea of performing on stage with her but believes Katie has a long way to go before she’s ready. The irony is that she’s a far better dancer than he is!” Excuse us, but has this person seen Cocktail? Tom’s bottle-tossing in that film combines the grace of Gene Kelly with the macho authority of Michael Jackson. Or vica versa. Anyway, it’s awesome.

While we certainly would love for TomKat to claim the mantle of our new Freg & Ginger…or fail hilariously trying…it’s hard to believe the former Maverick is really so nuts as to think hotfooting around stage with the missus is what will finally wipe away the stink of crazy Scientology videos and that couch jump with Oprah Winfrey. Our opinion of the guy has been so transformed we can’t even watch A Few Good Men these days without think Jack should be afraid of him. If Tom starts twirling in public, the laughing will only get worse.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Presented Without Commentary: LiLo With Nose Candy At Cannes

Lindsay Lohan

Friends (and some curious white lines on a nearby table) wait with Lindsay Lohan for her lost passport in Cannes earlier this week. The starlet, reportedly returning to LA tomorrow, just posted $100,000 bail after missing a court hearing concerning her probation. Lindsay will be forced to wear an ankle bracelet and take random drug tests while waiting for trial.

[Photo: TMZ]

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American Idol‘s Most Insane Outfits Of The Year

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Now that the season is drawing to a close and two of the tamest contestants ever,  Lee DeWyze and Crystal Bowersox, are in the finals, we’d like to turn our attention the real reason we watch American Idol – the outfits.

We have learned from Rachel Zoe that anyone can call themselves a stylist, and that’s especially true of the people who pull together the clothes worn on this show. And don’t even get us started on hair and makeup – this year we’ve seen more than our fair share of Bieber-inspired mullets, Bride-of-Frankenstein highlights and questionable use of Wet n’ Wild lip gloss over these five months. We thought Siobhan Magnus would have provided us with the majority of wacky ensembles on our list, but as it turns out, there were a lot of fashion disasters all season. Tyler Grady and his scarf-shirt (Shart? Scirf?), Didi Benami‘s throw-rug-vest…we had forgotten about these hot messes.

So who wore the most insane looks of the season? Check out our gallery of the 15 craziest and let us know what you think.

[Photos: Getty Images/AmericanIdol.com]

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Kate Beckinsale’s Cleavage Catches Her Earring At Cannes AmFar Benefit

Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale‘s dress looked pretty tight at last night’s AmFar gala at the Cannes Festival, so it’s a good thing her cleavage successfully caught her falling earring on the red carpet, keeping her from having to try and pick the low-hanging bauble up from the floor (sadly, her decolletage has been unable to keep her recent films from slipping right down the box office chart). The soiree was a predictably star-studded affair, with Jennifer Lopez, Marion Cotillard, Elizabeth Banks, Grace Jones, Michelle Rodriguez, Mischa Barton, Kristen Dunst, Naomi Campbell, Paris Hilton, Rachel Bilson and countless others (including Gerard Butler and Russell Crowe, somehow not disrupting the time-space continuum) enjoying performances by Mary J. Blige and Patti Smith. See what everyone wore in the gallery below.

[Photo: WireImage]

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Snooki Shows Off Her Swimsuit In Miami

Snooki

Maybe when we heard the cast of Jersey Shore would only be in Miami for a short time, what they really meant was that the clothes of Jersey Shore would only be in Miami for a short time. For Snooki‘s reign of terror down south continued yesterday, with America’s princess tramping around the surf and sand wearing a jungle print one-piece PETA should protest no matter what it’s made of. At the very least, she’s keeping her puppies in criminally small quarters.  See more photos of the cast making children cry into their sandcastles in the gallery below.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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My Mother Recaps The Real Housewives: Let Us Open Our Satchels of Gold

It’s not that all that much happened on last night’s The Real Housewives of New York. In fact, the ladies didn’t really do anything. And even with Jill Zarin and Luann de Lesseps back in New York while the remaining ladies vacationed on the Virgin Islands, something was in the air last night that proceeded to give America the Superbowl of all Real Housewife episodes.

Ramona Singer’s whirlwind vacation kept delivering, as their yacht pulled up on a staggering mansion that was truly something out of an 80s wealthy divorce comedy. Alex McCord and Sonja Morgan remained their funny selves, while Bethenny Frankel was busy filming her hospitality college video application. There were Skinny Girl totes and beautifully prepared steak dinners.

But all the while, lurking in the shadows, was Kelly Bensimmon. She’s been feverpuking for weeks following nightmares of Bethenny murdering her with a butter knife. (More satisfying cause it’s slower.) At the dinner, Kelly — not a genius, by any means — proceeded to flip her skull open, remove her brain, and flambe it for all of America to witness. It was a nervous breakdown squared shouldered. It was one of the best things I’ve ever seen on TV.

Your tireless recapper and also my mother Judy Collins was basically foaming at the mouth last night with anger, though she swears she still hates Jill more. We bring you her recap, slightly uninterrupted:

Kelly Bensimmon, Post-Tote-Bags, Pre-Dinner-Party-Breakdown

I have to tell you.  There is no… (loud sigh) oh boy — OK, first of all, that place they’re at is literally drop dead gorgeous. Something really special.  But that Kelly. Just like Alex said before, she cannot be in a room of people.  She hates this one, she hates that one… She’s the one with the venom against Bethenny.  And it’s relentless! She’s like sick or something.

Cook vs. Chef: The Final Cookdown

First of all, who gives a sh*t if she’s a cook or a chef.  “You’re a chef, you’re a cook!”  You’re supposed to be an intelligent girl.  This is what you’re talking about?  And it’s not like one week she slipped. Like one week she’s stupid.  It’s every week!  She says “Look at me! How smart I am!”  You’re a f*ckin idiot!

And then calling Jill, the backless slug (Ed. Note: A thing, apparently), and now Jill is contemplating visiting her? I mean, really, what the hell is this?

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Penelope Cruz Auctions Off Couture Gowns For Haiti

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She brought in the cash! Penelope Cruz auctioned off couture gowns worn on the red carpet for Haiti. And get this… they raised $333,000. The auction happened in Cannes, and they helped raise funds for  Sean Penn‘s Jenkins-Penn Haitian Relief Organization.

Plenty of celebrities stepped up to donate their gowns. The lovely stylish ladies included Scarlett JohanssonDiane KrugerCharlize Theron,Naomi WattsMarion CotillardDemi MooreGisele BundchenAnne HathawayJulia Roberts and Gwyneth PaltrowSalma Hayek Pinault got top marks. She wore the first gown from the brand new Gucci Première couture label for a screening of Robin Hood last week. One bidder was so enamored that he paid 17,000 euros – the equivalent is approximately $ 21,000 – for it.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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Lindsay Posts Bail, Will Avoid Arrest—If Not Jail Time

Sorry, TMZ—looks like you won’t get that “LiLo in cuffs” photo you’ve been crying for. Lindsay Lohan posted the $100,000 bail that will keep police from swarming upon her like locusts in blue upon her eventual arrival at LAX from Cannes. Already facing jail time for missing alcohol education classes, Lindsay risked arrest by skipping an important court date Thursday concerning her probation. Despite allegations that someone (possibly an agent of the nefarious Michael Lohan) stole Lindsay’s passport, the judge issued a bench warrant. Lindsay is expected to return to America later today.

Despite her freedom, we presumably won’t see much of Lindsay once she returns, as she’ll be forced to abstain from alcohol and wear an anklet. With photos of the starlet living it up in Cannes continuing to surface (and the French police denying Lindsay reported that missing passport), she could be in for a rude awakening when she finally steps into court. The scary thing is that Lindsay may not have even hit her low yet—she could still show up at Chateau Marmont this weekend, wearing her court-enforced alcohol monitor as an accessory.

[Photo: .com]