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Kommisar Rex Might Be Greatest Opening TV Sequence in History

When we came across a photo of Inglourious Basterds’ Gedeon Burkhard being spooned by a giant German Shepherd, well, we didn’t really understand it, but we immediately fell in love with it. As a result, Gedeon topped our Hottest Men of Inglourious Basterds list.

Turns out that photo was a publicity shot for a German television show entitled Kommissar Rex, or “Inspector Rex”, whose Wiki page describes the show as follows:

The original series is set in Vienna and focuses on the three-man staff of an office of the Kriminalpolizei - the Austrian Crimial Police – specifically a Mordkommission, or Murder Commission. In addition to the three policemen, the office is staffed by a German Shepherd called Rex who functions variously as a cadaver dog, a sniffer dog (for both contraband and narcotics) and as another pair of eyes and ears for his team.

Hmm… we’re pretty close to sold on it. But frankly, it’s the shows HILARIOUS title sequence that makes us want to saddle up both the dog and K. Rex and ride them off into the technicolor sunset. A credit sequence that features acting so terrible, so over the top German, that we’re basically storming to our local Netflix supplier and demanding they bootleg it any way they know how (as it is currently not available in the US).

Ahead, a fan made tribute to the show set to Bonnie Tyler’s “Hero” that will make you weep hot, salty dog tears into your bowl of kibble, creating the most delicious gravy you’ve ever sampled. This dog is a F**KING GENIUS YOU GUYSSSSS:

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Zac Effron Prepares For Upcoming Role as “Ken: The Magical Eunich-orn”

ZAC EFRON AS KEN THE EUNICHORN

Zac Efron: We just don’t know how to feel about you. On the one hand, we did watch your movie 17 Again 4 times in a row while on a transatlantic flight to “Crushville“, and had a fantastic time doing so.

On the other hand, we see pictures like the one above, with you flexing your 9-pack abs while simultaneously smoothing back your hairstyle borrowed from Full House‘s Derek Boyd meets Jon Benet Ramsey, and we remember that you are actually just a boy. A small boy who happens to have the nubby-crotched body of a Ken doll.

Fine… he looks good. (More revealing pics, including some gratuitous push-up shots) over at ONTD)

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Commander-In-Chief Nick Jonas

Nick Jonas

If actor/bodybuilder Arnold Schwarzenegger and wrestler Jesse Ventura can become state governors, there’s no reason Nick Jonas can’t become president, and that’s just what he wants to do someday.

Jonas spoke to the National Press Club yesterday to raise awareness for juvenile diabetes, which he suffers from, and he appeared to be a natural behind the podium addressing fans and the media. He told them, “I’ve always had this dream of becoming president one day,” and later, the 16 year old explained that as crazy as it sounds, he does plan to study political science and it’s not such a remote possibility. “As much as I joke about it and kind of say it to get a laugh, it is somewhat serious.” If 12 year olds could vote, no doubt President Jonas would win in a clean sweep. The question is, who would be his VP? Joe? Kevin? Taylor Swift? [Photo: WireImage]

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It’s The Candy Spelling Show!

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Although she has publicly knocked daughter Tori Spelling for using her grandchildren as “reality show props,” now Candy Spelling is ready for a show of her own!

“Yes, there is,” Candy said, when asked if there were plans in the works for a show. Candy clarifies however, that she does not intend to compete with her daughter and Dean McDermott in the reality show arena. “I wouldn’t do a reality show,” Candy says.

Despite their previous feuding, Tori hopes her mom’s new show is a success. “I wish her the best,” Tori says. [Source: People; Photo: Getty Images]

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The One Where Joey Tribbiani Attempts to Speak Hebrew… and Fails

Don’t ask why the following video of the cast of Friends shilling for the “world-famous” Chabad Telethon exists. Or why Joey Tribbiani, aka Matt LeBlanc, from Friends, Joey and Married with Children fame, is so connected with the good people of Chabad. The video is at once baffling and, at the same time, completely understandable. You can’t really expect Joey to say anything in Hebrew without cracking himself up…

But the Friends/Chabad link doesn’t end there… in fact, the stars of the shit sitcom Joey also taped a little spot for the Telethon. And with good reason. If you’ve never seen the show, regardless of religion, it’s pretty much the most entertaining televised charity function ever. Picture Jon Voight deidle-deidle-deeing around a stage with a group of Orthodox Jews for 3 hours straight, and you’ll begin to get some idea of what it’s about. (The next one will air on September 13.)

Click ahead for the “LOLs”, as they say.

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Diane Kruger And Joshua Jackson’s Relationship “Comes Naturally”

Diane-Kruger-Joshua-Jackson

Diane Kruger and Joshua Jackson are annoying, if only because in addition to being extremely hot, they are also extremely adorable and cute. It’s not fair that they manage to be so perfect! Jackson won our hearts when he was on “Dawson’s Creek” and Kruger’s breakout role was Helen of Troy in the 2004 film Troy. Now she’s all over the place promoting Inglourious Basterds where she kicks ass in addition to looking gorgeous, in the grand tradition of all Quentin Tarantino heroines.

The couple is low-key though when it comes to their relationship. Kruger explained, “It’s just easy, right? You don’t feel awkward things or you ask yourself questions of ‘what am I going to next week?’ It just flows and I think that’s the good thing.” When asked what her favorite thing about Jackson is, she swooned. “Aw. Everything. He’s the best.”

The couple has been together since 2006, and when asked what their secret is, Jackson explained, “Lots of poets have spilled lots of ink, but so far as it occurs to me, if you’re willing to put in the time and the work, everything else comes naturally.” He’s pretty poetic himself there, too. Glad they have managed to avoid the drama that often comes along with copulating in crazy ol’ Hollywood. [Photo: GettyImages]

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Are Dog Hybrids Really Safer For the Environment?

Poodles. Just your typical house dog, born with a fur that makes them ripe for the grooming. And as though having testicles carved into your hair before being paraded in front of a slew of judges wasn’t bad enough, now “creative groomers” are taking this torture to an entirely new level: Turning poodles into other animals. Witness:

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OK, we admit, Poodle Camel is actually adorable and certainly less assy smelling then the real thing. But what about Poodle Horse, replete with little fur hooves?

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Terrifying. After the cut, we’ve got some more doggie hybrids, including a pretty psyched looking panda, a very convincing poodle buffalo, and yes, even a Poodle Steeler. Not like that, we don’t think…

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Christina Aguilera Is Still Dirrty

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She may be a doting mother of one-and-a-half-year-old Max Liron, but when Christina Aguilera and hubby Jordan Bratman passed through Los Angeles International Airport yesterday, the songbird reminded us that she’s still nasty. Christina lifted up her blonde locks to show off her “Xtina” tattoo, as if to remind us that although she can nowadays more likely be seen carrying a diaper bag and baby bottle then wearing assless chaps, she is still a badass. Check out our gallery of other fabulous celebrity tattoos![Photo: Splash News Online]

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