Poor Katie Holmes. She worked so hard rolling her jeans half way up her leg and cutting her hair all fugly, just so we’d notice her. And now after months of walking in and out of some theater dressed all frumpy, her big night finally arrived! She’s in a real ol’ Broadway play! She’s the star! People might even buy tickets! But then look who steals the spotlight away from our girl: Tommy Cruise and a bunch of creepy protesters. Katie, looking particularly sallow and hollow-eyed, hovered behind her man as he signed autographs and grinned at the crowd as they left the restaurant after celebrating her first performance. He should have just married the spotlight instead. [Photos: FilmMagic, GettyImages.]
A publicity company is hawking a new spray that will allegedly let celebrities strike back at their paparazzi oppressors without any messy legal hassle. Just calmy point your STOParazzi Spray bottle at the offending photographer. Then press the top to shoot some non-toxic gunk onto the camera lens. The company claims it’s hard to remove, but won’t damage the equipment. No one’s been seen using the spray yet, but once Kanye West gets word of this new development in anti-pap technology, some might not leave their limo without it. [via INF Daily]
[Photo: Getty Images]
What’s with all the loose clothes, Jessica Simpson? Are you hiding a little friend? Not according to the singer, who says she swallows more Tony Roma than Tony Romo. “I’m a nervous eater and this tour has made me a nervous wreck,” Simpson told the National Enquirer. Judging from how she rhapsodied about Romo to People, it sounds like she’d calm down and stop packing if he wasn’t off Packing.
Tony is a great quarterback, but he’s a better boyfriend. I’m seriously proud of myself for letting him into my life. Through all the chaos and torment and everything I go through, I can lay in his arms and finally rest.
To be my man, you have to put up with a lot. I toot under the sheets, I spend a lot of money and I can belch the ABC’s.
Awww…here she is on tour—tooting and belching more than ever—and Romo’s not around to hear it. Check out the gallery and decide for yourself if nerves or Romosexual practices are behind her bloat.
Last night all of Hollywood’s tweenage royalty stepped out in shoes we can’t afford to attend the 6th Annual Teen Vogue Young Hollywood Party. We’ve gathered the pics below so you can marvel at how unfair it is that sixteen year old girls get to wear better clothes than you. The most exciting things of the night – according to our eyes – were Zac Efron‘s bizarrely styled hair (it reminds us of the number we’d do on our bangs in 1989 with a comb and some L.A. Looks hair gel) and the strange faces Rumer Willis was making. Can’t imagine it in your head? Check out our GIF above to give you an idea of what she was bringin’. More pics that taunt your closet below. [Photos: GettyImages]
Pamela Anderson gets really pissed when people use fur in their clothing lines. She really becomes irate when she asked them not to and they promised they wouldn’t, but then they do it anyway. PETA’s most vocal member is reportedly enraged at celebrity-favorite designer Giorgio Armani. Allegedly PETA had persuaded Giorgio to drop fur from his collection, but his fall line includes floral-printed fur coats, fur-trimmed skirts and jackets, and fur coats for – BABIES!
Elisabeth Hasselbeck, who spends so much time on The View yelling and crying that she belongs on The Hills, is possibly leaving the show. A source says that, “Elisabeth feels she can’t win at The View, but she’s been told by friends at FOX News that they’d find a spot for her without hesitation.”
Translation: E-Hass is sick of being the only conservative on the show. We can’t say we blame her for wanting to jump ship, it’s gotta be pretty exhausting wearing cute outfits and rattling on about John McCain for five hours a week. At least she’ll be the prettiest thing on Fox (after Geraldo Rivera, of course). [ONTD]
In January, “sources” claimed that Paul McCartney‘s excessive alcohol intake was causing heart problems, as well as the rift between him and ex-wife Heather Mills. At the time, Mills’ publicist had no comment. Earlier this month, Michele Elyzabeth, the publicist in question, said Mills was behind the falsehood and that “That witch tricked me into spreading lies about Paul. She’s a bitch.” Now Mills is suing Elyzabeth for 250,000 pounds, claiming that Elyzabeth—who’s sold her story to News Of The World—-is a liar, not her. Between this and the more than 24 million pounds Mills got out of McCartney, Scandalist hopes that Mills has successfully made the world realize that it is not worth having anything to do with her.
Phew! Paris’ pups are alive and well-and hard at work in the recording studio. Despite reports that two of Paris Hilton‘s 17 dogs were killed by coyotes, the heiress’ rep said, “They were at Paris’s house Wednesday in her recording studio, and all the dogs were playing and looked as healthy and happy as can be.” When the pups aren’t recording music, they retreat to their posh digs. “Paris even had a doggie mansion built for them and it is very secured,” the rep said. Now we can relax, and picture Paris’ pups snug in their mansion, instead of mangled on a hillside. [Source: People; Photo:Getty]
Wow. Underneath those dead eyes lies a woman who finally decided she ain’t gonna take it anymore. Audrina Patridge is packing up and movin’ out of Lauren Conrad‘s guest house! No more tears drenched in toxic mascara waste! No more vag-flashing Lo making her feel inferior because – let’s face it – she’s from the Valley and not Laguna! No more meals where the topic of conversation is silence! Audrina is breaking out, and we’re kinda psyched for her. As for where she’s going – we’re sure it involves Justin Bobby, a motorcycle, and a ridiculous pad no one her age – or with her job of half-assed interning at a music label – could really afford. She should probably thank Lauren before she leaves. [Us. Photo: WireImage]
It always amazed us that Pat O’Brien wasn’t fired back when he got caught leaving horny voicemails for that “f*ckin’ hot,” lady in which he attempted to entice her with a hooker, coke and boob licking (listen to his NSFW masterpiece here). For some reason he was allowed back on TV with a rehab stint and a weepy apologize special with Dr. Phil. But so much for second chances! Pat O’Brien has finally been booted from his hosting gig at The Insider, after his email bashing co-host Lara Spencer leaked – just like every other creepy thing he does.
So pour one out for the world’s creepiest horndog, who will surely be hosting some sort of talent-based game show very soon. [DListed. Photo: GettyImages]