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Mariah Carey Steamed Over Ex’s Tell-All

Damon “Damizza” Young, who produced several tracks for Mariah Carey between 1999-2005, says he’s releasing a book about their “intense four-year personal relationship,” which he claims she “worked diligently to disguise from the world’s press.” He sounds pretty ungrateful after all the work she gave him (his biggest single with her, “Crybaby,” barely made the Top 30), but if he had front row seats during the nuttiest period of her career (remember the Cribs episode?), this could make for an exciting read.

But wait! Carey’s lawyers have already sent Damizza a reminder that he once signed a confidentiality agreement with Mimi. On one side—the gawking, snoopy snide—we hope he can get around this obstacle. But on the other, we’d hate to see his solo career get a boost. Check out his atrocious “Damizza” song, featuring Mariah, after the jump.

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by (@katespencer)

Meet Brody Jenner’s Latest Conquest: Playmate Of The Year Jayde Nicole

What do you think, is Jayde Nicole a step up from Kristen Cavallari, Nicole Richie and Lauren Conrad?

Amazingly, hot women seem to be attracted to the douchebag factory that is Brody Jenner. We’ve never quite understood what is so attractive about a dude who loves throwing down peace signs, tattooing his name on his body, and Spencer Pratt – but chicks seem to dig it. But his latest lady is of a respectable pedigree – Playboy! She’s not just any old Playmate, she’s the Playmate of the Year 2008. Doesn’t she seem to be a little too good for a dude about to star in a show called Bromance?

On second thought – she apparently has the word “respect” tattooed right above her vadge. Sounds like a perfect match!

[Photos: Getty Images, FilmMagic]

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Help! Bastards Stole R.E.M.’s Guitar

We thought Scandinavia was full of easy-going, lovey-dovey blondes, not guitar-stealing nogoodniks. Guess we were wrong. A couple nights ago in Helsinki, Peter Buck of R.E.M. had his trademark Rickenbacker 360 guitar lifted from the stage. Poof – no more jangle. The band is offering a reward and accepting information about the instrument’s whereabouts. Head to the R.E.M. website for the specifics.

Here are five of the band’s best Rickenbacker tunes. Do you agree? Listen to R.E.M. at Rhapsody.

  • “Sitting Still”
  • “Seven Chinese Brothers”
  • “Pretty Persuasion”
  • “Feeling Gravity’s Pull”
  • “Begin The Begin”

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Kanye Arrested For Assault, Continues To Blog

Wow, he really does hate the paparazzi more than a Nazi! Kanye West was arrested at the LAX aiport for battery and vandalism. According to TMZ, Yeezy wrestled with a photographer (o cried for help) before shattering the man’s camera on the ground. When West’s assistant realized the fight was being taped, he took that camera and smashed it. Police grabbed the rapper before he could board is plane, though TMZ says that didn’t stop West from lunging at their cameraman (“give me the f*cking videotape!”) while authorities questioned him.

Despite allegedly being detained at the airport, Kanye has posted ten items on his blog over the last two hours, including a post on Pharrell Williams’ new medallion (“SIIIIIICK!”). Scandalist doesn’t mean to suggest Kanye doesn’t author his blog (we wouldn’t dare). We’ll just note that forward scheduling posts can sometimes lead to embarrassing ironies.

[Photo: WireImage]

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Michael Douglas To Play Liberace In Upcoming Biopic

In the 80′s, greed was good. Today, gay is good. Steven Soderbergh says he’s lined up Michael Douglas, who starred in his Oscar-winner Traffic, to star in a movie about the legedarily flamboyant pianist. Matt Damon is in talks to play Scott Thorson, the guy who sued Liberace for $113 million dollars in palimony. With Sean Penn‘s Milk looking like a winner, no gay icon will be left behind by Hollywood’s male elite. [Variety]

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Jenny Gets Rid of John’s Piano, Moves On

Looks like both Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer are moving on after their much-gossiped about relationship. Recently, John Mayer was spotted with Spanish waitress Maria Marin, who he dated before Aniston. Allegedly at the final show of his two-month world tour (of which Jen was a stage-side fixture), John was stealing glances at his blonde friend.

But two can play at that game. Jennifer is now linked to 300 actor Gerard Butler. At this past weekend’s Toronto Film Festival, Butler was spotted with his hand on Jennifer’s thigh, then proceeded to give her a back rub.

This is a far cry from the Jennifer Star Magazine reported about last week. Allegedly, during the course of their several-week relationship Jennifer bought tomcat Mayer a piano. The $80,000 piano sat in her house for his enjoyment, but now that they’re no longer together, Jen couldn’t look at it without getting upset. Rumor has it she gave it to her father. [Photo: Getty Images]

by (@katespencer)

Eva Longoria: “I’m Just Fat!”

Scandalist to Eva Longoria: “Shut the f*ck up.”

I’m just fat” is the Desperate Housewives star’s answer when asked by Us magazine if she was pregnant. Sigh. Let’s clear the air on a couple of things here:

  1. Eva is not fat, and judging from what we’ve seen so far, never will be.
  2. She is married to a 6 foot 2 inch tall basketball player, and is a foot shorter than her man. We’ll know when she’s lugging a baby around in there.
  3. The actress would not know fat if it put her in a sandwich and ate her for lunch. She should keep her mouth shut – except when she’s eating, of course.

[Photos: Getty Images]

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Jessica Alba Tapes Her Mouth Shut

No, that’s not Jessica Alba in bondage; it’s the actress posing in a provocative new ad for Declare Yourself, a nonprofit, nonpartisan voter initiative that encourages 18-29 year olds to vote. The “Only You Can Silence Yourself” campaign features Alba quite literally silenced, with gags and masks stifling her voice as a citizen.

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by (@katespencer)

Lauren Conrad To Write Most Boring Books Ever

Thought your brain couldn’t get any mushier? Think again. Lauren Conrad – she of the blank stare and the solid track record of losing friends – has signed on to “write” three books that are basically just about her blessed existence in Hollywood. “It’s definitely influenced by my own life,” she told People. “The books are about a girl who moves to L.A. and stars in a reality show, so obviously there are some similarities.”

Some? It’s The Hills for book nerds (do these exist anymore?). Lauren promises that people from her real life will not be mocked or mirrored in the series, claiming, “Some of the characters may symbolize people in my life, but it is in no way calling anyone out.” That asshole character named Fencer is purely crafted from the empty, dark cavern that is Lauren’s imagination.

Confidential to Lauren: You can’t write this book on your Blackberry, FYI. You need to use something called a computer. Yes! It’s the big, white thing you sat in front of at the Teen Vogue office for three years. [People. Photo: Getty Images]