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by (@katespencer)

Drew To Hugh: I Wanna Eff You

Isn’t in sweet when two of the biggest skanks in Hollywood – prostitute-employer Hugh Grant and serial dater/wedder/divorcee Drew Barrymore – come together to suck face? It just feels so right! The former costars (from Music and Lyrics – don’t worry, we didn’t see it either) reconnected with their mouths at the Waverly Inn on Monday night. After Grant left, Drew hitched herself to Clive Owen. Apparently somebody’s got a bad case of the Brits.

Hugh, meanwhile, moved on with two ladies at a Meatpacking District Lounge on Tuesday night. “Hugh went straight to the bar and made out with a pair of girls for the entire evening,” said a spy. But the actor, who is supposedly still dating Jemima Khan, didn’t waste any time getting to know his new pals, randomly quit the kiss-fest and abruptly got up and left the club.  [Photo: FilmMagic]

by (@katespencer)

Dina Needs Someone To Buy Her Debt

Oh dear! Worst mom ever, Dina Lohan, apparently owes $11,485.74 in taxes on her Merrick, Long Island home. Apparently having a crappy reality show on E! just isn’t what it used to be, and Dina’s dealing with some serious debt.

Lindsay’s enabler needs to fork over the fee by tomorrow, or the tax lien placed against her home will go up for auction next week, opening up the opportunity for any old Joe Schmo to step in and snap it up. The lucky buyer will then get to collect 10% interest from Dina herself! It certainly says something about the state of Lindsay’s career that she’s not stepping in to help her mama out. Luckily, Dina has another kid to exploit for some cash – it’s time to drag Cody Lohan out and make him work!  [Photo: GettyImages]

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Angelina Jolie “Totally Creeped Out” By Octomom

Everyone knows that octomom Nadya Suleman is living one twisted version of Angelina Jolie’s life, and the connection hasn’t been lost on the Changeling star. The Chicago Sun-Times reports that Jolie is “totally creeped out” by Suleman, who attempted to contact Jolie through letters praising her humanitarian efforts. Not that the source doesn’t appreciate the respectful distance Suleman kept.

At least she wasn’t a total crazy…like the stalkers who try to actually meet Angelina and follow along with the paparazzi. It is clear this woman needs psychological help. It’s one thing to clip out a celebrity’s photo from a magazine and ask your [hair] stylist to copy that cut. Who hasn’t done that? But to have a nose job, have collagen injections in your lips and start talking like Angelina – that’s over the top.’

She’s not the first person to do that, you know. Remember I Want A Famous Face? And way to suggest that the pinnacle of insanity is annoying a celebrity rather than hoarding children like some deranged cat lady, anonymous source.

[Photo: WireImage]

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Heidi Klum Is Fat

Of course she is. Those leggy limbs, that lean womanly figure. Huge, isn’t she? Eh? But that’s what fellow German, designer Wolfgang Joop thinks of supermodel Heidi Klum.

“She is no runway model! Heidi Klum is simply too heavy and has too big a bust. And she always grins so stupidly. That is not avant-garde – that is commercial!” he rants to German newspaper Bild.

Dear God. There’s no hope for any of us now, is there? Let’s hope that Joop doesn’t get wind of the Jessica Simpson “bellygate” controversy otherwise we’re all going to think we’re obese hippos and develop eating disorders in a flash. Those crazy continentals! [Photo: Splash News Online]

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Even Gwyneth Can’t Make This Look Good

We’re wondering perhaps if Gwyneth Paltrow has got a bit carried away with herself fashion-wise. After everyone worshipped her last year for owning the red carpet in those sexy dresses and killer heels, she’s kicked off 2009 by totally losing the style plot.  Earlier this week she stepped out in a pair of truly revolting feathered stilettos.  But that wasn’t enough, and last night she attended a screening of her film Two Lovers in a pair of high-waisted leather hotpants. Is she trying to bring lederhosen back? Was it an attempt to wrest the limelight back from her lunatic co-star Joaquin Pheonix? All we can say is that the bored slutty 1980s suburban mom look DOES NOT WORK. And if it doesn’t work on Gwynnie, it’s never going to work on anyone else. [Photo: Splash News Online]

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Courtney Love Warns Madonna Away From London

The US/UK Celebrity Swap Treaty (TM) in recent months has given us Paris Hilton and you Victoria Beckham. (No fair!) But we in the UK are making up for it now. After giving back Madonna after an eight-year loan program, we’re getting in return Courtney Love. Yay!  And bonkers Courtney is making sure that her nemesis Madge doesn’t come anywhere near her new ‘hood.

“Madonna had better stay the hell away from London when I move here to live! There’s no room for us both. Buckinghamshire is where I want to go. I’m fed up with L.A. It’s full of crazy people. People criticize Britain but it is still a cleaner, safer place to live than Hollywood,” she writes.

Woo-hoo! We’re very pleased about this as Courtney’s sure to improve the celebrity landscape more than Madonna and her endless gym visits, faux-country-set posturing and pretending to like drinking pints, as we reckon Courtney might actually like a drink or two. See photo above. But we really hope she knows where she’s moving to. Buckinghamshire isn’t London, love. It’s the countryside. And the Queen doesn’t live there. Just to clear that one up. Welcome! [Photo: Splash News Online]

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Citizen Scandal: Topless PETA Protest Fails To Rid Store Of Foie Gras

PETA sure knows how to get attention. Want to get people to realize dog shows are cruel? Dress up like Klansmen! Want to protest a British department store selling foie gras? Take off your clothes! If people won’t listen to horror stories of how waterfowl are force fed to create the delicacy, then maybe they’ll listen to naked people. Cuz everyone takes a naked person seriously.

A handful of half-nude PETA representatives appeared in front of a Selfridges store in London earlier today, posing for cameras until cops told them to move on. The protesters then bared their breasts, locked arms in front of the building and sang “Give Geese A Chance” as police sprayed them with a firehose and dragged their limp bodies away.

Just kidding. They left as soon as the cops asked, knowing that these photos were bound to educate and persuade. If just one boob enthusiast checks PETA’s anti-foie gras website and promises never to buy the expensive dish again, it all was worth it. And look out for Nazis in lingerie protesting horse-drawn carriages in Manhattan.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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by (@katespencer)

Matt Insults Regular People By Not Flaunting His Wealth

It’s always such a slap in the face when dudes like Matthew McConaughey (seen above this week in Malibu) are rich, because all they want to do is skateboard with a stick, live in a trailer, roam around barefoot and have sex after a day of surfing and chowing down tofu-dogs. He could work as a temp or rob a bank and live a happy existence. We’ve seen Point Break, we know how this life works. But what about the rest of us who actually want to drive Escalades and eat off of diamond-encrusted plates while grinding with Khloe Kardashian? It just doesn’t seem fair, ya know? [Photo: Splash News Online]

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EXCLUSIVE: Move Over Angelina Jolie: Girl Auctioning Her Virginity Is Turning Humanitarian

Natalie Dylan, the 22-year-old San Diego woman, is not only going to be swimming in hundred dollar bills from the multi-million dollar sale of her virginity, but in a unique twist has decided to use her status as the world’s most famous virgin to help others who are less fortunate. Natalie is auctioning off her virginity to the highest bidder, will likely become a charity spokesperson.

Natalie tells Scandalist she has been approached by several charities who work to promote women’s rights to be a spokesperson on their behalf. “It’s really an honor,” Natalie says of being approached to help organizations who assist women in need. “One helps women forced into prostitution and another helps women who have suffered genital mutilation,” she says.

Having Natalie on their team can certainly help bring attention to their cause – and Natalie hopes the attention will be largely positive. Natalie put her virginity up for sale last year with the help of Moonlite Bunny Ranch owner Dennis Hof, and her story quickly became a media favorite. She soon was flying all over the country to sit down with Tyra Banks on her talk show, and do tons of print, radio, and television interviews.

The bids for Natalie’s virginity quickly reached $3.8 million – and the payout won’t stop there. Natalie has been flooded with book and movie offers and even a reality TV show. In addition, several large corporations have approached her regarding being a company spokesperson.

As for the auction, the highest bidder won’t necessarily win. “She wants to be comfortable. There are a few people she likes. She has been talking on the phone and emailing with several men,” Dennis tells Scandalist.

One man in particular appears to be a top contender. Natalie tells Scandalist that she has been corresponding most often with a 39-year-old Australian real estate heir, who she declines to name.

Although she is searching for someone who she clicks with, Natalie insists this will only be a one night stand. “I prefer to meet someone organically. I wouldn’t want to meet someone (to date) that way,” she tells Scandalist.

While handling her virginity auction, writing her book, and fielding countless offers, Natalie has actually kept her regular job at a company she refuses to name. Her boss has no qualms about her controversial auction and in fact is extremely supportive. “He admires my gumption and creative marketing,” Natalie tells Scandalist.

The end date for the auction is still open-ended as Natalie has no intention to “prematurely end something that could be so lucrative.”

Related Content: Natalie Dylan, Selling Her Virginity, Will Get Up To $3.8 Million
Natalie Dylan, Auctioning Virginity, Meets 59-Year-Old Bidder
Natalie Dylan, Auctioning Off Virginity, Sets The Record Straight

by (@katespencer)

Cops’ Case Against Chris Brown Is “Kinda Weak”

More details are popping up surrounding Chris Brown and Rihanna‘s Sunday night slug-fest, and cops are now saying they may have a “kinda weak” case. The fight between the two clean cut pop stars erupted after Chris received a bootycall text message (not from Keshia Chante, apparently). Chris starting hitting RiRi during their fight, and she then faked a phone call to a friend, requesting that police be present when Chris dropped her off at home.

This set Chris off even more, and he apparently dropped a threat along the lines of “You are really f*cked up now. I’m going to kill you.” He then began pummeling the singer, who somehow managed to grab his keys out of the ignition and toss them out the window.

But the worst of the latest news to leak is that Rihanna told cops that this was not their first altercation; Chris has apparently been violent with her before. And though the D.A. is still investigating the case to decide how to prosecute (hence, the fact that it may be “weak”), it looks like it’s Brown who is “really f*cked up now.”  [TMZ. Photo: WireImage]