It’s Friday!!!!!!!!!!!! Throw all your GIFs up in the air and let them settle around you like a comfortable nest of moving images. Not sure what we mean? Then click below and find out.
Best Week Ever
Thanks to today’s wackadoo press conference featuring Beyonce, we now know that she can sing live. (Although, did we really not know that before? The woman has literally been singing non-stop since she was 6 years old.) Anyway, due to lip sync rumors that turned to be tragic realities, Beyoncé admitted she lip synced only AFTER proceeding to sing the Anthem live…at the press conference. That’s Beyoncé for you! Haters to the left! Wait, but she loves haters? Make up your mind, B.
Argue amongst yourselves whether the best part of this magical junket was Bey singing directly at her haters OR the press conference’s very last question, asked by a gentleman from Denmark, as to WHAT COLOR TOOTHBRUSH BEYONCE USES. I didn’t think Beyoncé used a toothbrush–what with her robot teeth all perfect and shiny 24/7–but she claims to use a blue one (“or blue and yellow?”) and therefore all blue toothbrushes are now worth ~$10 more at your local Walgreens.
The Man From Denmark also had two other questions, but he didn’t get to ask them. Here is what I think he meant to inquire:
So! Who is having the Best Week Ever? Last week it was the boyband-obsessed Sherri Shepard, but this week is another big one–and we’re gonna need your votes to help decide.
Arguing the case for their picks, we had Best Week Ever cast members Michelle Buteau, Michael Che, Nick Turner weigh in.
My clever friend and fellow Entourage enthusiast (Is there a messageboard for us somewhere?) Pauline texted me this afternoon with a clever idea for a game to celebrate the recent news that the HBO show is heading for the SILVER SCREEN.
The game? Guess Entourage: The Movie‘s plotline using just the emoji in your phone. Here was Pauline’s initial submission and then my additional suggestion:
VINCE GETS THE MOVIE!
HUGE NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This Slow Loris eats a rice ball. On YouTube. Just for you.
It’s painfully adorable because, physically, a Slow Loris’ eyeballs are huge. And as we’ve learned from Zooey Deschanel (and Bambi?), the bigger you eyes are, the cuter you are. This is just science.
With a sneaky Facebook photo, Doritos officially announced the long-awaited existence of the sister to the beloved Taco Bell Nacho Cheese Doritos Taco: THE COOL RANCH TACO BELL DORITOS TACO. Because everyone knows that Cool Ranch is the best Doritos flavor (I will fight you on this), and the conversion of the chip into a taco shell has been a wild success for both Doritos and Taco Bell.
That’s why, we’re preparing for the arrival of the Cool Ranch Doritos Taco by putting our favorite things in/on it.
Perhaps our headline gives it away but guess who had the Best Week Ever…And knows it?
Best Week Ever Poet Laureate Nick Turner was not at this week’s Inauguration, but he did want to dedicate his own piece of poetry to the President. Good thing we have a green screen and some GIF of a waiving American Flag. Take it away, Nick! Do our country proud.
HBO’s Girls may speak to many of the females out there, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of…boobs. Guys like those, and they probably would like Girls if it was cut like a 1980s monster truck rally commercial. And that’s why we did this. For you, boys & Girls!
What would another week be without Cousin Biscuit weighing in on this week’s redneck going-ons? Well, it would probably look like some sort of orchestra recital, but that’s beside the point. If you watch any reality TV, you’ll need to bone up on your Redneck Speak. That’s why we have Biscuit!