Are Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne headed for a split? Who’s poised to pick up Golden Popcorn for Best Female Performance at tonight’s MTV Movie Awards? And Sarah Jessica Parker donates some fabulous footwear, all in today’s First Dibs.
Gossip
First Dibs: Kobe Bryant Vents After Possible Season-Ending Injury
Which TV icons have been cast to play a lesbian couple in the season finale of Glee? Who were the most overpaid actors in Hollywood last year? All this, plus a sneak peek from Fast & Furious 6 in today’s First Dibs.
Zoe Saldana Continues To Catch Hell For Her Role As Nina Simone
Zoe Saldana may be in over her head with the lead role as Nina Simone in the biopic, Nina. The casting of Zoe was immediately met with side-eyes and constructive criticism. Cynthia Mort, director and writer of the film, was called out by Nina’s daughter for not consulting her or the family to make sure Nina’s legacy was depicted accurately. The controversy spun into an even bigger debacle when pictures of Zoe on set in black face with an afro wig hit the ‘net. And it ain’t pretty. Read more…
Ciara Takes The High Road, Although We Rather She Didn’t, When Addressing 50 Cent And Chelsea Handler Drama
Perhaps Chelsea Handler isn’t over 50 Cent. It’s the only reason we can come up with that she’s still talking about him all while blaming Ciara for breaking up their friends with benefit situation relationship. Who knew an ex could breakup a, uh, non-existence relationship? Now that Ciara‘s promoting her forthcoming album One Woman Army she hit up Big Boy’s Neighborhood show on Power 106 to discuss the new single “Sorry.” What Big Boy really wanted the tea on how Cici felt about Chelsea’s accusation. And, well, Cici kept it cute … although we secretly wish she hadn’t. Read more…
Stevie Wonder Files For Divorce From His Wife After Three Year Separation
Just when our mourning over Tom and Katie’s divorce subsided, TMZ reports after 11 years of marriage the legendary Stevie Wonder has filed for divorce from his wife Kai Millard Morris for irreconcilable differences. In the divorce documents obtained by TMZ, Wonder asks for joint custody of their two sons ages seven and 10. In 2001 the couple tied the knot, separating eight years later in October 2009. Despite his feelings toward his soon to be ex-wife, Mr. Wonder agrees to pay both child and spousal support. Such a stand up guy. Our inquiring minds want to know if Mr. Wonder sang “I Just Called to Say I Love You” to his ex-wife in an attempt to reconcile. Sad to see the couple divorce after over a decade, but let’s all hope this doesn’t get nasty. And for our poor little hearts, no more celeb divorces this year. Please!
[Photo: Getty Images]
While The Other Jacksons Are Fighting, La Toya Jackson Gets Her OWN Reality Show
There’s some good news from the Jackson family after all the bickering amongst MJ’s kids and siblings. La Toya Jackson has landed her OWN reality show, Life with La Toya, set to premiere in 2013. Now we know why she has managed to stay away from all of the Jackson family shenanigans. Can’t mess up the once in a lifetime chance to have her own show on Oprah’s network, now can she? Read more…
Are Rihanna And Chris Brown Canoodling In France?
Rekindling love along the French Riviera makes for a great scene in a romantic movie. Only this isn’t a rom-com, it’s allegedly ex-lovers Rihanna and Chris Brown. The New York Post reports the two ex-lovebirds shared an intimate dinner a deux in Monaco. Adding grist to the rumor mill, Rihanna has been tweeting some rather cryptic messages like “#3words last night was beautiful,” and, “Touch down baby, help me pick out my fit,” indicating her “baby” had arrived. Not to mention the alleged dinner date she had with Chris in L.A. before her vacation. Read more…
The Game Says It’s His Fault The Wedding Is Off
There’s trouble in paradise, well, what could have been paradise. TMZ reports rapper The Game and fiance Tiffney Cambridge have called off their wedding 10 days before the couple was scheduled to walk down the aisle. What in the Sam Hill happened? Only four days ago TMZ reported that the Compton native was working with 51 Minds Entertainment to film a reality show based on his road to jumping the broom. Apparently a lot can happen in four days. Today the no longer soon to be groom tweeted, “The rumors are TRUE. The wedding is OFF. It’s not her fault, it’s mine! She’s a GREAT woman, I just wasn’t man enough 2 see it through.” We hope this has nothing to do with the supposed reality show that was in the works. Read more…
Did Rihanna And Chris Brown Secretly Go On A Date Before Her Italian Vacay?
It’s true. Rihanna‘s milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. Word to Kelis. When it comes to her love life the live-life-on-the-edge starlet has been rumored to be dating pretty much every male celebrity with a pulse despite only having two boyfriends we know of for sure– Chris Brown and Matt Kemp. For the 656,702 time rumors have circulated that she and Breezy are secretly seeing each other. According to Perez Hilton (who has since deleted the post) the ex-couple had dinner, alone, before RiRi headed to Sardinia, Italy for a much needed vacation. Per Perez Hilton a source connected to Breezy’s team said the two met up for a drink where they talked for 30-45 minutes. Read more…
Kim Kardashian’s Ass Is Officially A Postmodern Commentary On Itself
Here is a photo of person Kim Kardashian taken yesterday:
So, what do we even say at this point? Obviously our first reptilian brain-instinct would be to notice and point out the hugeness of her ass in this photo, but just as quickly, our brain reminds us that every possible Kardashian ass observation / joke / particle of knowledge was used up years ago, so we refrain from comment and pretend not to notice because it’s a hacky thing to even think, but at the end of the day, she still chose those pants, and still semi-posed for that photo (there’s like 8 more from the same angle), and we still notice it but don’t notice it and who knows WHAT ANYTHING MEANS ANYMORE IN THIS WORLD WE USED TO CALL CELEBRITY GOSSIP (and still currently call “Celebrity Gossip”).
There’s only one possible explanation: Kim Kardashian’s ass is officially now a satirical meta-commentary on itself.
We don’t even need to notice or make the joke anymore, because the ass is ALREADY that; it’s like the last two years of George W. Bush’s presidency, when he’d mess up words and we wouldn’t even care to point it out anymore because everyone already knew and he might as well have been doing it on purpose even though he wasn’t but still could have and at some point the joke turns inwards and explodes and we move onto the next thing. My point is just, George W. Bush’s malapropisms are literally Kim Kardashian’s ass.
Also, if you’re wondering what makes it a “Postmodern” commentary, it’s the same reason that makes anything else “Postmodern”: I wanted to put an extra word there.
(pic via Splash News)
