Today marks not only our first day here on BWE.tv without the irreplaceable Michelle Collins (we are in extreme tragic denial and thus cannot emotionally elaborate on this sad fact), but it also JUST SO HAPPENS to be the birthday of one Michael Fassbender, aka, quite possibly Michelle’s most-covered hot topic of all time.
In honor of both Mr. Fassbender’s birthday and Michelle’s impossibly-timed departure, we present on her behalf this imaginary list of 5 Photos Of Michael Fassbender In Party Hats:
With the Clash of the Titans sequel Wrath Of The Titans hitting theaters this weekend, we wonder, what does the future have in store for the “[Word That Sounds Like 'Clash] Of The Titans” film franchise? Cue up The Clash and check out our wishlist of 5 ‘Clash’ Sequels We’d Like To See:
George Orwell’s classic novel 1984 is on track to be adapted into another feature film. Noted street artist Shepard Fairey is said to be co-producing the project, but we’re still highly confident Hollywood will find a way to ruin it. Here are 19 simple ways Hollywood can do exactly that:
19. CGI’d Big Brother
18. Victory Gin Replaced With Ciroc
The Denver Broncos officially signed Peyton Manning to a 5-year contract today, a move which will likely lead to the eventual trade of current Broncos quarterback and polarizing alliterative-name-haver Tim Tebow.
To visually chronicle Tim Tebow’s roller coaster ride of emotions over the past 24 hours, we now present to you the following series of photos entitled “Tim Tebow Goes Through The 5 Stages Of Grief: A Photo Essay”.
Stage One: Denial
In honor of the internet’s tireless ongoing attempt to make award shows watchable, we at BWE present this roundup of 50 Oscar Tweets Funnier Than The Actual 2012 Oscars. And if you don’t enjoy them, at the very least, they’ll take you two hours and fifty-some less minutes to sit through.
Please enjoy, share, Retweet, whatever, just so the work of these brave, patient internet souls was not in vain (semi-NSFW):
Oscar montages: Is anything more necessary? Some might argue ‘no’ and be correct, but on the contrary, we believe that no Oscars telecast is truly complete without a number of time-killing, vaguely-themed tributes to arbitrary aspects of cinematic history. To keep this immortal nontedious tradition rolling, here’s our humble suggestion to the Academy, a list of 12 Terrible Oscar Montages We’d Like To See:
1. A Tribute To 20th Century Cinema
From Citizen Kane to Star Wars, Birth Of A Nation to American Pie, there truly was no century for film quite like the 20th Century. This 49-minute montage celebrates every film in the 1900s, from The Great Train Robbery to 1999′s Any Given Sunday and literally everything in between, with unforgettable single-frames of each classic movie flashing by 20-at-a-time every millisecond – a golden tribute to The Golden Century of Cinema.
2. Volleyballs In Film
Who could forget the shirtless volleyball scene in Top Gun? Or the classic pool-volleyball spike in Meet The Parents? Join Wilson from Cast Away as he narrates this trip through 70 years of spike-tacular volleyball moments on the silver screen including a rare deleted scene from 1980 Best Picture winner Ordinary People, accompanied by Zooey Deschanel and Josh Groban performing a ballad-ized “Great Balls Of Fire”.
We’ve already enjoyed the past couple weeks of Jeremy Lin pun headlines, but now, as Linsanity overlaps with this period of Lent, let’s take a moment to give up not looking at awesomely terrible pun signs and celebrate 40 Days Of LIN-T with these photos of The 40 Best Jeremy Lin Signs:
Off the heels of our highly necessary and Award-winning coverage of The 50 Most Ridiculous Outfits From Paris Fashion Week and The 1 Most Ridiculous Outfit From Rome Fashion Week, here’s the equally important third component of our “Whatever You Say, Fashion World” Trilogy – The 50 Most Ridiculous Outfits From New York Fashion Week 2012:
In honor of Valentine’s Day, we’ve sifted through the many inevitable pop-culture-themed Valentines that pop up on the ol’ lovebox (internet) every year and compiled this cute, puntastic, and extremely loving compilation of The 8 Most Adorable Sets Of TV-Themed Valentines. Click any of the pics for Full Size, and any of the links for more Valentines!
REMEMBER: Forwarding this post to your sweetie legally counts as a gift.
8. Breaking Bad
By Shimmering And White:
7. The Walking Dead
By Some E Cards:
With the 2012 Grammy Awards upon us and everyone already thrilled for the big Beach Boys / Foster The People / Maroon 5 reunion (finally!), let’s take a second to remind ourselves of something we all already know and complain about every year: The Grammys are, without a doubt, the weirdest and most arbitrary awards show in the entire entertainment world.
To re-prove this time-tested theory, we’ve scoured Grammy’s checkered past and compiled some of its most bizarre winners in a desperate search of some meaning for this odd gramophonic statue. From the awesomely-random to the just flat-out terrible, here’s a list of 13 People You Can’t Believe Won A Grammy:
1. Zach Braff
Without rehashing the internet’s eminent disdain for Garden State, let’s just take a moment to acknowledge that an actual physical golden gramophone was given to Zach Braff for being the “compilation producer” of the third-date-mix that was the Garden State Soundtrack. Nothing against the actual music, but if burning Nick Drake onto cds to impress people is award-worthy, most of us earned that Lifetime Achievement Award by sophomore year of college.
2. Mikhail Gorbachev
The former Head of the Soviet Union won a “Best Spoken Word Album for Children” Grammy for his contribution to a 2004 recording of Peter And The Wolf, though it might’ve been a make-up win after his failure to be recognized for having inspired a decade of award-worthy hilarity from Yakov Smirnoff.