Rowan Atkinson, aka Mr. Bean (aka Love Actually jewelry salesman) was involved in a car crash Thursday night when his McLaren F1 supercar reportedly struck a tree and lamppost before catching fire. Atkinson received only minor shoulder injuries.
Even though the end result wasn’t tragic, in retrospect, we REAAALLY should’ve seen this car crash coming. To prove once again that laughtrack-aided hindsight is indeed 20/20, here’s a collection of The Five Most Reckless Clips Of Mr. Bean Driving:
5. Changing Clothes & Brushing Teeth
In honor of Shark Week, Discovery Channel’s annual one-week exSHARKaganza (ExtraFINganza? Extrava…teeth…thing?), here’s an exclusive behind-the-scenes peek of 7 Rejected Shows You Won’t Be Seeing During Shark Week:
PBS recently announced that they’re bringing back the beloved children’s classic Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood in the form of a new animated spin-off series entitled Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood. While this sounds like good news on paper, since it’ll allow a whole new generation of kids to experience some form of the unselfconscious positivity of the well-loved original series, we’ve been burned by remakes enough times to know that absolutely nothing is for certain, especially an attempt to spin-off Mister Rogers in the year 2011.
While we remain optimistic, here’s a list of 8 Things We Definitely Do Not Want To See In The New Mister Rogers Spin-Off:
1. Trolley Upgraded To Nissan Pathfinder Of Make Believe
2. King Friday Replaced With Seven Vampires
If there’s one iron-clad rule in marketing, movies or otherwise, it’s “Sex Sells.” If there is another ironer-cladder rule in marketing, it’s “People Notice Boobs.” Or to take the advice one step further, “Boobs boobs boobs.” You are now all licensed postermakers.
The new sideboob poster for Sarah Michelle Gellar’s show Ringer got me thinking (first about boobs and then) “What are the all-time most blatant uses of boobs in posters?”
From posters entirely centered around the lead actresses’ cleavage to subtler posters that still go out of their way to make sure those boobs are clearly noticeable, here’s a list of The 30 Most Blatant Uses Of Boobs In Movie Posters:
1. Cruel Intentions
2. Romance And Cigarettes
The first official teaser trailer for The Amazing Spider-Man hit the web this week, and to the untrained eye, it MAY look exactly like the other three Spider-Man movies just with different, more attractive actors (Martin Sheen – RAWR!).
However, if you pay extra-close attention, you’ll realize that the new revamped, rebooted 2011 Spider-Man contains numerous aspects that weren’t in any of the other films, making it a fresh and thoroughly necessary update on a stale film franchise
Here are 10 Things In The Amazing Spider-Man That Weren’t In Any Of The Other Movies:
1. Kindles now much cheaper.
2. LeBron James now on Heat.
3. South Sudan now an independent nation.
4. Gasoline up roughly $1.50 / gallon.
5. Spider-Man musical finished.
Have you always wanted to see all the Wonders of the World, but just don’t have the time or money or Bucket List disease to make it happen? Now you’re in luck!
Here’s a list of 15 of the Most Amazing Places In The World As Seen On Google Maps — now you can experience all the genuine awe of the world’s most beautiful places simply by scrolling down! Get ready to EXPERIENCE THE WORLD:
1. The Grand Canyon
2. The Sistine Chapel
Videos of babies cursing comprise one of the more surprisingly common viral video genres, but, like all truly great organic viral trends, the videos are so consistently funny and adorable, they’re immune to “another one of these?” criticism.
To commemorate National Swearing Week (I made that the f**k up), here’s a cute yet technically NSFW restrospective of 12 Adorable Videos Of Kids Swearing:
1. Kick The Monster’s Ask
Bad news, monsters.
With the rise of shows like Off The Map and Combat Hospital, the days are clearly numbered for boring old super-dramatic shows about hot doctors f***ing in REGULAR HOSPITALS. Instead, television is issuing in a new wave of super-dramatic shows about hot doctors f***ing in CRAZY, NON-REGULAR PLACES, so we can all experience the same realistic doctor-f***ing and people getting bombs shot into them in new and exciting ways!
To keep this trend moving, here’s a list of ideas for 7 Absurd Medical Dramas We’d Actually Watch. I think we can all agree: The days of medical dramas taking place in stupid old HOSPITALS is long gone. Psh…Hospitals. So 90s!
The first official poster for The Dark Knight Rises came out today, and while it’s obviously very cool looking, it also completely lacks any punny, faux-intense bat-related taglines to convince all of us that it’s worth seeing. Who wants to see an almost certainly very awesome sequel to two really awesome movies if it… [shudder]… doesn’t have a wacky tagline?
To help Christopher Nolan ensure that this tagline-free monstrosity doesn’t horribly flop, we’ve come up with these 10 Taglines For The Dark Knight Rises. Don’t want to steal any credit here, but I think we’ve ensured that the movie will be good now:
PETA is protesting the premiere of Kevin James’ new CGI’d monkey-fart Zookeeper to “send a message to Hollywood that audiences care about what happens to these animals behind the scenes,” even though the film’s director insists “I am completely secure with what happened on our set and believe we did everything we could to treat the animals well.”
Even if we disregard the animal welfare debate, however, there are still PLENTY of reasons to be mad at Zookeeper. While I hate judging even obviously-bad kids’ movies before seeing them, the evidence here is pretty overwhelming — here are Five Legitimate Reasons To Protest The Movie Zookeeper:
1. This Screen
2. This Clip