by (@unclegrambo)

Porn Parodies Are Basically The Only Thing Keeping The Porn Industry Afloat These Days

The financial troubles of the porn industry were recently chronicled in a New York magazine cover story called “The Geek Kings of Smut.” In the piece, porn moguls like Steven Hirsch of Vivid decried not only the explosion of amateur porn, but also so-called “tube sites,” described by the magazine as “YouTube-like repositories of content that is often free, and often pirated.” So now that anyone with a webcam is now able to make (and publish!) their own porn to horny, hairy-palmed dudes the world over, how are the denizens of the San Fernando Valley going to continue to make themselves enough money to keep themselves rolling in tacky jewelry, lucite heels and hard narcotics? Besides a grant from Charlie Sheen, that is? Two words: porn parodies!

Earlier today, our friends over at Splitsider alerted us to the tremendous news that a Community porn parody* is now in the works. Not surprising, we suppose, especially considering that Reservoir Dogs and the Justice League of America were both turned into porn parodies in the last week.

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by (@unclegrambo)

Hitler Would Like You To Stop Making Hitler Reaction Videos

When we first heard the news earlier this week that Constantin Films, the studio behind the German-language WWII film Downfall, was working with YouTube to shut down the scores of “Hitler Reacts To” videos that have sprouted up online, we here at breathed a sigh of relief, thinking we’d finally be able to put one of the internet’s most annoying memes comfortably in the rear view mirror. Sadly, yet expectedly, this news only resulted in more Hitler reaction videos sprouting up.

In response, our crack video guru, Mr. Pete Schultz, put together the following video, one that we’re hoping will be the final nail in the “Hitler Reacts To” meme coffin. Danke schoen.


AD WIZARDS: Is Remy Martin Marketing To Vampires?

Right now Remy Martin has a new ad campaign that pictures sexy people in dark, reddish places looking sketchy with the tagline “Things Are Getting Interesting”. What is actually interesting to me is that these ads don’t really look like a ‘fun, sexy time’, as much they look like an invitation to some vampire party in an urban dungeon. Which makes me wonder…Is Remy Martin doing some cross promotion for a new vampire feature?

Observe an ad here:


And this one here:


Here’s what I think they’re really getting at:
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Sara and I Finally Tell The Truth About Ourselves

So you know that part on Gossip Girl the other night where we find out that Blair Waldorf’s new boyfriend wasn’t actually who said he was!?! Well a very similar thing happened last night right here in the break room, where SECRETS and REVELATIONS were REVEALED! See for yourselves:


TRAILER MIX: Three Matthew McConaugheys And A Baby

You guys might have read the news this week that Matthew McConaughey and his model girlfriend gave birth to a shirtless new baby boy named Levi. While just the idea of this laid-back extreme athlete raising kids is funny enough on its own, the good people at Funny or Die have decided to give this high-concept comedy The Hollywood Treatment by producing a trailer for a hilarious would-be movie called Three Matthew McConaugheys And A Baby. What hijinx will ensue when the three McConaugheys’ plans for surfing and shirtlessness are confronted with the realities and responsibilities of good parenting. Alright, alright, alright…


EXCLUSIVE: Excerpt From The Screenplay Tatum O’Neil Was Researching By Buying Crack

You guys have probably heard that actress Tatum O’Neil was arrested last night while trying to buy crack cocaine near her apartment in Downtown Manhattan. Well, through our shadowy network of non-existent movie role operatives, has obtained an OMGEXCLUSIVE excerpt from the screenplay for the film she was talking about. After you read it, you’ll completely understand why she needed to be buying those drugs. The movie’s called 22 Grams (yes, it’s a sequel – don’t judge), and you can read part of it below!


Read the rest, after the jump!

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Don’t forget — BWE’s nightly Best Day Ever (Tompkins Style!) segment premieres tonight at 11! Check it out on VH1, or on several seconds after it airs! Or both! Sorry, local network news, but you had a good run.

Meanwhile, on the ‘netzzz…

Bill Clinton

  • PINNACLE OF DEMOCRACY: On the eve of the Pennsylvania primary, the presidential candidates will square off on WWE’s Monday Night Raw tonight, marking the biggest political / wrestling crossover event since Ronald Reagan impaled Nikolai Volkoff on the American flag in 1985. (
  • STREET SLANG: Amy Winehouse has been nominated for three Ivor Novellos. I’m not sure what those are, exactly, but I’ll bet they reeeeallly eff you up. (Guardian UK)
  • JUST SHOOT HIM: A stuntman on the new Bond movie accidentally crashed Bond’s iconic $250,000 Aston Martin into a lake in Italy, though he ended up miraculously surviving and swimming to shore (surprise, surprise). (People)
  • SUPERGROUP: Scarlett Johansson and David Bowie collaborate on “Falling Down,” which is not, unfortunately, a new Woody Allen movie. (Stereogum)
  • PROPHECY: South Park’s prediction about the Miley Cyrus gossip sacrifice takes another step closer to coming true. Gonna be a gooooood corn harvest… (Guess Who)