The internet seems to be aflush with “kid-ized” Gotye videos these days (if ‘aflush’ isn’t a word, then pretend I said ‘fullerino’), where parents keep filming their kids singing or dancing to “Somebody That I Used To Know” in the hopes of sharing their hilariously spontaneous love of synthy breakup songs for the internet’s welcoming amusement.
It’s basically at the point now where I’m preeetty sure Gotye only ever existed to give kids an opportunity to be filmed dancing to Gotye, marking the most forward-thinking viral-marketing moment in music history (or at least, ever since Rick Astley foresaw the internet existing eventually and recording that hilarious psyche-out in the late 80s and being like, “You’ll understand this in 20 years…”)
My point is, let’s all watch this adorable and great video of a baby dancing to Gotye:
Check out two more videos proving the above thesis over at Strollerderby.
Here’s a video of a man opening a beer with a chainsaw.
AWWWWWW SHEEEEETTTTT this takes me BAYKE to my COLLEGE YEARS, AM I RIGHT BOYZ???? Because I drank a beer in college once. Not because I used a chainsaw or did anything remotely intense ever. But the beer is HALF the video, really, so I’m allowed to have it remind me of my college years. GET OFF MY BACK you SQUARE HAND-BEER-OPENER!
Take it away, Saw 7:
(via The Daily What)
Here’s the first video on the internet.
It’s a drunk lady sitting on a window awning and being like “I’m drunk bet this’ll never fall” and the person filming it (because of course you’d film your friend just sitting there) is like “Oh I hope you don’t fall” and then… I won’t tell you what happens after that! WINK! WIIIIINK!!!! WINKWINWKWINWKNWK!!!
I just can BELIEVE what happens!
I’m not saying this video was clearly staged, I’m just saying, I can’t think of a joke way to just say it was staged to complete this sentence, because it’s too staged. It’ll make sense tomorrow when we find out this was all viral marketing for new Dasani Windows.
Here’s a video of a squirrel with its head trapped inside a small snack bag (it’s unclear whether the bag is manmade or if it’s the squirrel’s own brand of snacks), and the filming onlooker who takes note of the squirrel’s semi-humorous predicament then vows to save him. I was more invested in the characters in this film than in any of the Transformers movie, including the one where Bumblebee got his head stuck in a bag for 35 minutes.
This reminds me of the time (true story!) friends and I rescued a rat whose head was stuck in a crisscross-patterned trashcan in Manhattan, though in retrospect, I really hope that rat didn’t go on to Saving Private Ryan one of my other friends after I let him go…
(Arbroath, via Dlisted)
Here’s a video of Mr. Rogers’ pal Mr. McFeely introducing a Purple Panda to a group of kids, and the kids are absolutely terrified. Several sites have posted this video with the question “Is it wrong to laugh at this?”, to which I say, of course it’s not wrong – kids fleeing in tearful panic for no reason is completely hilarious.
It’s hilarious because at some point in our lives, we were these kids, being legitimately, truthfully afraid of something seemingly benign because we saw it through our ignorantly-perceptive child-eyes, and we can all relate to this panic. It’s also just regular hilarious (sorry kids!):
This raises the question: What was your dumbest childhood fear?
I’ll go first. I was scarred for life by the Temple Of Doom bugs scene, but when I saw that again years later, I realized I was completely correct for having that fear.
My dumbest childhood fear, though, was that I absolutely COULD NOT look at the screen when the Sesame Street ‘Yip Yip’ aliens were on. When they came on, I’d literally run out of the room. They scared me so much, one time they showed up on one of those Kermit ‘News Flash’ segments and I couldn’t watch the Kermit segments after that for fear that they might show up again.
Biggest childhood fear in the Comments, please. Unless your biggest fear remains internet-commenting, in which case, cool.
This video makes me SO jealous. Of both the vacuumer and the corgi. Is there someway I could be genetically engineered into being a corgi but with a long enough arm to also vacuum myself? And if not, what good is this Obamacare?
Roll over, relax and enjoy:
Also, its name is Corbin Dallas Multipass, and bye!
Here’s an incredibly elaborate stunt sequence promoting TNT’s “We Know Drama” campaign in Belgium (alt slogan “We Know Drama And Also Are Acquaintances With Van Damme”).
Basically, on a quiet square of a Belgian town, TNT placed a red “PUSH TO ADD DRAMA” button, and when one daring spectator steps forward to press it, all hell breaks loose: Cars fly by, guns are fired, Kyra Sedgwick closes things, you name it – classic TNT drama.
This may be the virallest viral-marketing stunt that ever viralled, but it’s still very virool (new term for viral-cool that’s going viral):
(via The Daily What)
Here’s a fight breaking out on a New York City subway between a man and a woman kicking each other, but unlike your average run-of-the-mill internet subway fight video, this one gets broken up in the most nonchalant way possible: By a dude choosing to stand between the combatants and eat potato chips.
If all it takes to break up a fight is to stand there and eat chips, then who knows, someday even I might be a hero! Ehh, actually I’d rather be sitting down when eating the chips, my feet kind of hurt. But one step closer to herodom!
Get this dude a Lay’s endorsement deal ASAP:
(via Gawker. The Reddit comments about this being the first correctly-filmed subway fight in internet history are also pretty funny.)
Here’s a video of Barack Obama shooting some impromptu three-pointers at an outdoor court, but it doesn’t go so well; he misses four in a row before finally sinking the fifth one, although that’s still 20% from behind the arc, which would tie him with Andrew Bynum for 295th in the NBA this season.
In terms of presidential three-point-percentages throughout history, those aren’t quite Rutherford “B-ig Shot” Hayes numbers, but they’re still respectable. He’s more of a points-in-the-paint type president anyway, in the William Taft / Andrew Jackson power-forward mold.
As Trey Kerby put it, “Miss a bunch then hit the last one to look cool? This guy must be a huge Kobe Bryant fan”:
(Politico, via @treykerby)
Here’s a video of a drunk guy getting arrested and singing “Bohemian Rhapsody” in its entirety while in the back of a cop car. It’s already all over the ‘netz (it’s on the front page of AskJeeves.com right now), but it’s internet must-see-tv, so here it is.
I’d just like to point out – if any of you did not have the privilege of attending a large state school as I did, this is what it felt like to ride the on-campus bus on weekends after 11 pm (with some Journey sandwiched in).
Move over, “Somebody To Love” Guy, cause Freddie Mercury’s spirit has found a new drunken body to inhabit:
Sidenote: Did he technically just confess to a murder? Ya should’ve picked a less incriminating song, dude. Perhaps Another One Bites The Dust?