If Kim Kardashian’s baby turns out to be a boy, we are already bracing ourselves for Fresh Prince of Bel Air jokes now that she and Kanye West have reportedly bought an $11 million home in the ritzy neighborhood. According to TMZ, the couple are turning the 10,000 square-foot home into a 14,000 square foot “Italian-style villa,” complete with movie theater, salon, bowling alley, basketball court, and indoor and outdoor pools. With that many recreation options, we hope they don’t opt to stay home too much instead of hitting the town where we can catch site of them and Babye.
After plunking down money for a new home like that, we are still surprised they didn’t take that $3 million deal for baby pics. Must be nice to have enough money to take a moral stand like that! (Unless, of course, they’re still waiting for a better offer.) Anyway, if paying the mortgage gets tough, they could always turn to the latest tactic Khloe is trying out on the eBay site she and Lamar Odom started to raise money for his Catherine’s Kids Foundation. Khloe’s unloading old clothing, including a used sports bra!
[Photo: Splash News Online]
Dina and Lindsay Lohan in 1986, following the alleged assault.
After Dina Lohan went to the New York Daily News with her story about how ex-husband Michael Lohan assaulted her in 1986 and raped her in 1990, Lindsay’s mother gave Entertainment Tonight three photos of herself with a black eye following the 1986 incident. Dina had actually spoken to the show back in September about the abuse, but the photos seem to have caught everyone’s attention now. And Michael Lohan, of course, was quick to respond.
“I didn’t punch her,” Michael told ET, reiterating his version of the incident, which he said started when Dina hit him in the back of the head with an ice tray. “I didn’t do anything deliberately to attack her. I swung out of reflex … she’s twisting everything.”
We kind of fail to see how swinging “out of reflex” is any less of an assault to a woman, by the way, especially when this reflex results in the black eye we see above. But since it’s a little too late for Dina to do anything about this, we do see his point that her timing is suspiciously self-serving. Ugh, they are both the worst.
[Photo courtesy ETOnline.com]
Related: Lindsay Lohan’s Mom Blames Everything On Michael Lohan’s Abuse, Dating Back To 1986
We always knew we liked Al Roker. That charming smile, that warm laugh, that total lack of filter. We also knew we were leery of gastric bypass surgery. Turns out, we were right on all accounts, as evidenced by the fact that…um…Al Roker accidentally pooped his pants at the White House. While that’s certainly better than intentionally pooping your pants at the White House, it’s both amazing and shocking to hear the Today Show weatherman admit to going Code Brown with the President of the United States in the next room. Apparently it all started after Al allegedly ate something outside of the dietary restrictions set following his surgery. “And as I’m walking to the press room, I think I gotta pass a little gas here. So, I’m walking by myself, who’s gonna know, only, a little something extra came out,” Al admits to Dateline‘s Dr. Nancy Snyderman. “I pooped in my pants. Not horribly, but enough that I knew.” Not. Horribly. Not horribly, but enough that everyone in the free world would one day know.
When we included Ryan Lochte on our 10 Things We’d Like to Leave Behind In 2012, we were only referring to medal-winning, Speedo-filling, grill-sporting, 30 Rock-cameoing Ryan Lochte. We enjoyed that Ryan Lochte immensely! We just felt like we’d had enough of him. The part of us that selected him as #12 on our 12 Celebs Who Dominated 2012 list must have known something wonderful was a-brewin’. That something is an E! reality show entitled What Would Ryan Lochte Do? You know, like those bracelets that ask What Would Jesus Do? So, so great. We really underestimated this guy. Plus we’re finally going to find out exactly how many pools Ryan has peed in!
“How deep is the pool of Ryan Lochte? It turns out, very deep.” E! wisely asked today while announcing the new six-episode series. The show will follow Lochte in and out of the water as he trains for the 2016 Rio Olympics, as well as manages his fashion line, interacts with his friends and family and (be still our hearts!) spends his spare moments “looking for the right girl.” This man’s life could not be more perfectly-suited for a reality show. Plus you know there’s a cavernous warehouse already filled with Jeah! t-shirts somewhere. E! just saved themselves some money right there.
Shame on us forgetting the piercing blue eyes and adorable smile of Kyle XY star Matt Dallas. Happy 2013 to us. Oh, and to Dallas too. Apparently he rang in the new year by both publicly announcing his engagement and the fact his beloved is a man in one convenient tweet! “Starting off the year with a new fiance, @bluehamilton. A great way to kick off 2013!” the actor gushed along with a photo of his musician boyfriend. On top of that, Matt’s tweet also introduced the world to the cutest dog alive and his little monkey friend. What can’t 140 characters do?
If we may be blunt, we’re pretty sure that many men have wondered what it’s like to be in bed with Heidi Klum. And in her new interview with Marie Claire, she gives us an answer: Terrifying! OK, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration. The former Victoria’s Secret angel and current super hottie opened up about her private night time activities to the magazine, and admitted to being a bit on the wild side.
“It’s good to make an effort to dress up sometimes – to do things outside of the norm,” she says. Wait wait wait, did Heidi Klum just admit to being a fan of furry costumes? That’s how we choose to read that. “Some people are more experimental in bed and others are more boring,” she goes on. Please Heidi, we prefer the term ‘bland.’ “If you are wild and crazy, bring it on so the other person is well aware that you have little devil horns that come out every once in a while.”
Whoa now, Heidi! Sure it’s a little racy, but it’s nowhere near as bad as some of these celebrity bedroom over-shares. Prepare yourself for some real pearl-grabbers and head on down to the gallery below!
As Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer headed to court today for a hearing on charges she assaulted a woman in a Manhattan night club in November, her mother has brought to light a very different defense of the troubled 26-year-old. And it actually makes a lot of sense to us, in the saddest way. Dina Lohan went to the New York Daily News on Sunday with her story of how ex-husband Michael Lohan abused and raped her in the late ’80s and early ’90s, and brought along police reports and medical documents to prove it.
“Lindsay saw her dad abuse me — that’s why she’s so screwed up,” Dina told the paper. She described how Michael punched her in the eye during a drive home after he been drinking and snorting cocaine. She also told of a time her husband raped her in her parents’ home, where she and her kids were living apart from him. On both occasions, Dina didn’t press charges because Michael was heading to prison for fraud and insider trading.
Last week wasn’t the best for Justin Bieber: After a paparazzo was killed trying to capture photos of a driver he thought was Bieber, photos of the 18-year-old smoking a blunt made their way to TMZ. So it was a pretty good time for the singer and his PR team to turn up the charm and hype some positive stories. First up, he sent out a tweet on Saturday morning that seemed to be an apology for his alleged pot-smoking.
From the start, we’ve been skeptical about the pairing of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West — would her reality-TV personality spoil his artsy ambitions? — but today comes a good sign that ‘Ye may actually be a great influence on his girlfriend. According to TMZ, Kardashian — who made mountains of cash selling her wedding to E! and People — and her baby daddy have refused a $3 million deal from an overseas tabloid for the first pics of Babye.
Now, if you still want to be cynical, you could suspect that they’re holding out for an even bigger deal, but TMZ’s sources say they’re not planning to sell the pics at all. That’s right in line with earlier stories that they don’t plan to make the kid a TV star either. Shocking, right? Could it be that Kimye are taking a parenting tip from BFFs Jay-Z and Beyonce, who have done a frustratingly good job at keeping coverage of Blue Ivy to a bare minimum? (BTW, happy birthday, BIC!) Hmmm, something tells us that they won’t go that far — some habits are hard to break.
[Photo: Getty Images]
Related: Kanye West Planned To “Take Over The World” As A Baby, His Mom Said – Will Babye Follow?
10 Important Life Lessons We Hope Kimye Passes On To Babye (Kimby? Kanbabe?)
Today in totally random news that resulted in us doing the kinds of Internet searches that would get us fired at any other workplace: Don Johnson’s penis. As sheltered children of the ’80s and ’90s, we weren’t exactly aware before today that the Miami Vice star — ex-husband of Melanie Griffith and father of Ben and Kate’s Dakota Johnson — has long been rumored to be particularly well-endowed. He appears in all kinds of lists of anatomically gifted famous men. That super reliable source of info, Wiki Answers, even posits that the actor is the origin of the use of “Johnson” as a euphemism for the organ — which we’re pretty sure can’t be true but find endlessly amusing anyway.
For some reason, however, Johnson, who co-stars in Django Unchained, was quick to debunk this rumor in a chat with Rolling Stone. “Look, I’ve seen guys with a lot bigger [penises] than me,” he said. “One time, I was in the Celtics locker room talking to Larry Bird and Kevin McHale … and there’s Dennis Johnson coming out of the showers and, dude, that’s who put the Johnson in Johnson. I mean, it must have shown on my face, because when I turned back to Larry, he looked at me and said, ‘I know, huh?’ and I was like, ‘Dude, that’s a weapon.’ ”
Well, that gives another meaning to this eulogy of Dennis Johnson, who died in 2007 of a heart attack: “He always rose to the occasion.” Sorry!
[Photos: Getty Images, NBC Universal]