by (@shalapitcher)

Gabriel Aubry V. Olivier Martinez: 5 Mostly Relevant Facts About Halle Berry’s Men

Olivier Martinez, Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry after the Thanksgiving altercation

Gabriel Aubry broke even yesterday when it came to legal wrangling in the aftermath of his Thanksgiving Day altercation with Halle Berry’s fiance, Olivier Martinez. First, the court refused to lift a prohibition on him getting within 100 yards of his and Berry’s daughter, Nahla, according to TMZ. But at the same time, law enforcement sources said he probably won’t be prosecuted for battery, since it was a case of “mutual combat.”

While all this is going on, we took a step back to review some interesting things about Halle’s current and former men, things that are sorta relevant to this situation:

1. Martinez, the son of a professional boxer, told Ocean Drive magazine last month that when he was considering taking up the sport himself, ” I a good left hook — but keep that a secret.”

2. Last year, the Telegraph named Aubry one of the top 10 earning male models in the industry. Despite his nice income, Berry was reportedly ordered to give him $20,000 a month in child support.
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by (@JordanRuntagh)

Are Bobbi Kristina And Nick Gordon Dunzo? Mysterious Tweets Say Yes

Bobbi Kristina Brown rumored to have split with boyfriend Nick Gordon

Fans of pseudo-incestual relationships will be devastated to learn today that Bobbi Kristina Brown and her boyfriend/adopted brother Nick Gordon are on the rocks! Neither camp has spoken out, but the daughter of  music legend Whitney Houston has posted some revealing tweets that suggest there is serious trouble in paradise. We know, we know – we thought they were going to last forever, too! At least they’ll see each other at Christmas. And, you know, all other family holidays.

The social media rant started on Monday evening, when Bobbi kicked off a series of frustrated messages by writing “I’m leaving, this this good ole town and driving to the send of the world. Maybe it’s beautiful there (: Xxxo”  Things got more pointed (and less grammatically accurate) soon afterwards, as the tweet avalanche begins in full force. “Who do I trust in this world? Pfft well that’s easy beezie, #Myself, No1 will kno’s me like ME&They’d rather not take thtchance2knoME, &2me. That’s incredibly fine .. Because you’d be missing out on a #REALperson. Xxo #amryofme #onmyown #goingtomakeit #determined. ” We had some trouble translating all the text-speak, but it seems like she’s pissed.

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by (@shalapitcher)

Jessica Simpson May Be Pregnant Again – But It Sucks That Someone Else Is Leaking This News

Jessica Simpson is pregnant again, according to a source

Jessica Simpson is pregnant again, according to an unnamed source who revealed the news exclusively to Us Weekly. The singer/designer/TV host’s rep, on the other hand, is completely mum on the news. So should we believe that she’s expecting, just under seven months after giving birth to Maxwell Drew? Given how secretive JSimps was about her first pregnancy, not saying a thing even long after her bump was visible, she could be. But we also think it’s really crappy of someone else to leak this story to the world (probably for some good cash), before Jessica and fiance Eric Johnson were ready to do so.

First of all, we suspect the pregnancy was a surprise to them. A little medical background (if you don’t like knowing how women’s bodies work do not read this paragraph): Maxwell was born in May. If Jessica waited the customary 12 weeks to tell her family of the good news, she conceived this new kid just three months after giving birth. Most doctors actually recommend waiting a year before having another child, to allow your body to recover. But if Jessica was breastfeeding baby Maxwell, her chances of conceiving were super low — though not unheard of — and it’s really hard to tell whether or not you’re pregnant right after having a baby, because your cycle is all out of whack. Based on all of this knowledge, we understand why the new parents would want to reveal the sensitive news on their own timeline.
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by (@JordanRuntagh)

Chris Brown Twitter Meltdown: Comedian Jenny Johnson Is Now Getting Death Threats

Comedian involved with Chris Brown twitter feud getting death threats

Flame wars happen all the time on the internet, but things are getting scarily real in the Twitter feud between one-man controversy machine Chris Brown and writer Jenny Johnson. The social media beef on the Sunday resulted in Brown deleting his account after dishing out a barrage of misogynistic, offensive and frankly pretty gross insults directed toward the comedian. But now some members of Team Breezy are apparently not happy, and they’re making their displeasure known by making death threats against Johnson.

But the Texas-based writer is taking it all in stride. “We are doing a bit of investigating… to see who are writing them and if they should be taken seriously, or just something we need to ignore,” she told Celebuzz. “We are trying to discover if it’s just a bunch of kids goofing off or something else. I’m just letting it go right now.” She admitted to being surprised that the beef with the celeb went as far as it did. “I was surprised to wake up and read about it and find my name on The View and CNN.”

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by (@shalapitcher)

Gabriel Aubry Expected In Court Today – Will Security Camera Footage Uncover Truth Of Martinez Brawl?

Gabriel Aubry is expected to appear in court to ask that he be allowed to see daughter Nahla again

Gabriel Aubry is heading to court today, TMZ reports, to ask a judge to lift the prohibition on him seeing daughter Nahla, following his Thanksgiving Day brawl with Halle Berry’s fiance, Olivier Martinez. As we mentioned yesterday, the Canadian model filed papers accusing Martinez of being the aggressor in the fight, which left Aubry with the frightening injuries you see above.
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by (@shalapitcher)

Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson Airport Pics Somehow Sparks Pregnancy, “Strain” Rumors

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson arrive at LAX on Monday night

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have basically been traveling the world nonstop for the past month, so yeah, we don’t expect them to get off the plane in full makeup and Gucci suits these days. But in the photo above, of the pair arriving back in LAX after a flight from New York, they still look a billion times better than, say, I did yesterday after a little Thanksgiving trip to Florida. They don’t even have bags under their eyes! Which is why we want to scream at the people who have jumped on these pics as proof of something or other.

Oh, that baggy T-shirt KStew’s wearing is definitely hiding a baby bump, some gossips say. It couldn’t possibly be just a casual shirt donned over skintight jeans (and I can assure you, THOSE are the first to go when there’s a bump in progress) for a cross-country flight.
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by (@hallekiefer)

Gabriel Aubry Alleges Olivier Martinez Death Threat And Things Just Get Worse From There

Gabriel Aubry Alleges Olivier Martinez Death Threat

See, we want to make more jokes about families fighting on Thanksgiving (because humor is how we deal with sadness), but considering how bad this news story is getting, that might be a tad gauche. Accurate…but a tad gauche. After news broke that Halle Berry had obtained an emergency protective order against Gabriel Aubry following a Thanksgiving brawl at her home, the Cloud Atlas actress’s ex is now claiming that her current fiance Olivier Martinez attacked him first, in addition to threatening to kill him. According to TMZ, Aubry alleges in a legal declaration the French actor was enraged over the $3 million he and Berry allegedly lost in her custody battle over daughter Nahla, leading Martinez to attack Aubry in the driveway. Witnesses told police that it was actually Aubry who started the fight, though with all the screaming and flailing any normal person would be doing at such a time, it’s possible that certain details were unclear.

Leading credence to model Aubry’s claims, however, are the bruises he has been sporting since the incident. Obviously we weren’t at Halle Berry’s house during the brawl (thank goodness, because we doubt that situation needed more panicked screaming), but the idea that Olivier Martinez would demand Aubry move to Paris or “Olivier would kill him” seems a touch far-fetched. Or maybe that’s just us hoping this story isn’t as horrible as it seems. It was a holiday, for pete’s sake! We are not looking forward to Christmas, is all we’re saying.

[Photo: Splash News]

by (@hallekiefer)

First RiRi And Chris Brown, Now Lindsay Dishes On Sam Ronson…Why Can’t We Leave 2009 Behind?

Lindsay Lohan Dishes About Ex Sam Ronson

It’s like we’re stuck in a pop culture time warp! First we are forced to visually revisit The Rihanna/Chris Brown Situation, which everyone and their mother (except for maybe Mom Breezy) wished had ended three years ago, and now this. In a new interview with Us Weekly, Lindsay Lohan spills the beans on her relationship with DJ Sam Ronson…which ended in 2009. What? Well, of course we’re still going to read the interview. We’re not that morally upstanding. “I was bold enough to say, ‘Yeah, I like a girl. And?,'” Lindsay explains to the magazine. “That put her in a situation where she was being attacked every day. That’s not fair. And what am I left with? Heartbreak.” Adds Lohan, “That was three years ago. It was my last serious relationship.” Wow, so this was Lindsay’s next P.R. move after the premiere of Liz & Dick? We know nostalgia is huge right now, but this is a tad ridiculous.

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by (@hallekiefer)

Angus T. Jones Beseeches America Not To Watch Two And A Half Men; A Nation Cheerfully Complies

Not a problem, dude! If Reba McEntire commanded us to stop watching Malibu Country, we’d fight her to the death for our right to quality television. If the half man from Two And A Half Men doesn’t want us to watch him cut up with Ashton Kutcher and Jon Cryer…well, we’ll at least listen to what he has to say. “If you watch Two and a Half Men, please stop watching Two and a Half Men. I’m on Two and a Half Men and I don’t want to be on it. Please stop watching it and filling your head with filth,” Angus T. Jones says in a video testimony for the Forerunner Christian Church.” He later adds “You cannot be a true God-fearing person and be on a television show like that. I know I can’t. I’m not OK with what I’m learning, what the bible says and being on that television show.” The quotes start at around the 7:30 mark, so maybe the show’s producer Chuck Lorre hasn’t heard it yet? We usually don’t watch any videos longer than three minutes, so it’s a distinct possibility. If he has, boy, those vanity cards are about to get sassy!

In Angus’s defense…he’s exactly not wrong about TAAHM being pervy. For example, there was an episode of Two And A Half Men where Charlie Sheen sleeps with an entire coven of witches. No, seriously. In fact, anyone who has seen the show will tell you it’s beyond raunchy. The only question is, is it raunchy enough for Angus T. Jones to give up his $350,000 an episode?

by (@chrisRULES_)

Lady Gaga’s Monster Thanksgiving Surprise: 35 Fans Show Up Uninvited For Dinner

Lady Gaga surprised by fans on Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is way past over by now, but don’t feel guilty about still eating those leftovers. Lady Gaga was doing the same thing when she was discovered “35 monsters” in the garage of her Peru home. When the pop star woke up in the nude to make a midnight run to the kitchen, she noticed some unexpected house guest on her security camera while making a leftover plate. In true Gaga fashion she embraced the “bad kids” and tweeted “#MONSTERFACT when gaga is asleep try to break into the garage, sing loud as possible, + ring the doorbell repeatedly #happeningnow.”

According to Sky New Lady Gaga didn’t notify any authorities and even allowed the fans to spend the holiday with her and her family. She even honored them with the endearing title “friends.” So next time someone tries to break into you’re home think to yourself: “What would Gaga do?” Maybe inviting them in for dinner will solve all conflicts – or then again, maybe not. We guess next year we’ll be camping out in Gaga’s garage too; who better to spend your Thanksgiving with than our beloved Mother Monster? At least her holiday was better than Halle Berry’s

[Photo: Splash News Online]