by (@hallekiefer)

Zachary Quinto Confirms He’s Dating Jesse St. James…We Mean, Jonathan Groff

Zachary Quinto Dating Glee's Jonathan Groff

We’re just saying, wouldn’t it be an amazing plot twist if Jesse St. James returned to Glee, only to start dating Zachary Quinto? First of all, Rachel would be super pissed (though, let’s face it, not entirely surprised). Second of all, Kurt’s head would explode off his shoulders and fly around the room like a fabulous, shocked balloon. While we won’t hold our collective breath on any Zachary Quinto cameos this season (or that balloon thing, because come on), the Star Trek actor did confirm that he is dating Glee star Jonathan Groff. “I’m incredibly happy, I’m incredibly lucky,” he told Out Magazine about his relationship. Jonathan’s no Wade Adams, but he’ll do. He’ll do just fine.

The American Horror Story actor also opened up about his decision to come out last October. “One of the defining conversations that I had with myself was that absolutely no good can come from me staying quiet about [my sexuality]. Literally, no good can come from it. But if I take the step to make the acknowledgment and be honest, so much good could potentially come from it,” Quinto explained. We’re just glad we live in a time where we can get equally squeal-y about adorable gay couples as we can about straight ones. We’re so excited, we could break out in a choreographed song-and-dance number! If that was a thing that happened in real life!

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@hallekiefer)

Anna Paquin And Stephen Moyer Welcome Their Twin Vamp-Babies!

Since that other vampire baby is currently dealing with her parents’ de facto trial separation (ohhhhh, can that be the plot of the fifth Twilight book? Which we assume will be called Around Brunch Time? That would certainly be a twist, wouldn’t it?), let’s all dedicate our supernatural squeeing to Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer‘s brand-new baby twins! “We can confirm that Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer recently welcomed their twins into the world,” the reps for the True Blood costars told Us Magazine this afternoon. “The babies were born a few weeks early, but are in good health and both Mom and Dad are overjoyed.” No word as to whether Anna Paquin had to be turned into one of the undead in order to avoid an untimely death during vampire childbirth, but hey, we all know how it works. It’s just undead science!

The no-doubt adorable vamp-babies are Paquin’s first children, while Moyer has two kids from previous relationships. Though the world has known about the incoming Paquin-Moyers since April, the names and sexes of the newborns have yet to be announced. Fortunately for Anna and Stephen, Sookie is technically a unisex name. Bill, not so much…

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Take Notes, Amanda Bynes: Tara Reid Didn’t Even Need A Car To Drunkenly Take Out A Motorcycle

Tara Reid Drunkenly Knocks Over Motorcycle

Someone get Amanda Bynes and Lindsay Lohan a pen, a piece of paper and someone to take notes for them, because they both have to go lie down for a little while! As has been made clear from recent events/arrests, these ladies need to learn the best way to leave a party. Fortunately for them, Tara Reid is teaching and school is in session. TMZ has video of the American Pie star drunkenly tumbling over a parked motorcycle in St. Tropez, taking down herself and a friend before sheepishly wobbling back to a yacht. On one hand, the video goes from funny to uncomfortable to sad in a microsecond. On the other hand, hey, Tara’s not in a car! And if she was walking to a car when she ran into a motorcycle, at least she never got there!

As delightful as it is to see any celebrity stumble into a pile of bike parts and waving limbs, the whole thing takes on a more sober meaning when you remember that Reid went to rehab less than three years ago. On a related note, is it us or is Tara’s life nearly identical to that of 30 Rock‘s Jenna Maroney? Yacht parties aside, remember when Tara got married to Zack Kehayov in 2011…only to reveal later that the marriage wasn’t technically legal? Or the fact that she’s constantly hanging out with Jedward? Just don’t let that woman near Mickey Rourke. Or any more motorcycles.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Is Chris Brown’s New Neck Tattoo Supposed To Be Rihanna?

Chris Brown's New Tattoo

It’s hard to type when you just want to face-palm all day, so we’ll keep this brief: Chris Brown showed off a new tattoo on his neck that depicts what appears to be a woman with either weird face tattoos (if you’re being generous) or with bruises and scars on her face (if you’re not so Team Breezy). Probably not the best choice for a guy convicted of domestic assault. Maybe he should have gone with an eagle or a peace sign or something like that. But wait, it gets worse (maybe). Many people believe that the new ink bears a striking resemblance to his former girlfriend Rihanna. Yeah, you probably see where we’re going with this.

Despite all of this creepiness, Team Breezy insists that it’s all just a coincidence. Sources close to the singer told TMZ that “it’s a random woman.” And they’re definitely insisting that the apparent bruises and stitches are just the woman’s tattoos and elaborate makeup. Whatever the truth,  it’s still an interesting choice to say the least. Even if there is an innocent explanation behind the marking, you’d think someone in his camp would have sounded the alarm that the tat could easily be misinterpreted.

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by (@shalapitcher)

Kristen Stewart Had James Franco Swooning Again In Toronto: Report

Kristen Stewart at an On the Road screening in New York

One look at Kristen Stewart in her stunning hair and makeup, white Balenciaga button-down and harem pants at last night’s screening of On the Road in New York, and we wonder what guy in his right mind hasn’t had thoughts of swooping in on the actress in an attempt to be her rebound. We still don’t know if she and Robert Pattinson have actually broken off their relationship — and we’re not making any pronouncements on that front. We’re just saying that, according to at least one report, there are guys possibly making a move to be her rebound. Guys like James Franco. Maybe.

We know Franco is a huge admirer of Stewart, based on the effusive Snow White and the Huntsman review he wrote for the Huffington Post back in June. Now Radar Online is reporting that his admiration went a little further when the two met in Toronto over the weekend. A source said they talked for 20 minutes, during which James praised Kristen’s work in On the Road.

“She seemed at ease in his company, and he was certainly making her laugh,” the source said. “She was wearing a huge grin on her face. At the end of their chance meeting, James took Kristen’s number and asked her out for dinner. Kristen initially said no, but is mulling over the idea. She knows she has to move on now following her break up with Rob.”

All of this sounds like a huge leap to conclusions based on observing someone else’s conversation. We’re sure we’d be grinning too, if the ever-charming and weird James Franco started complimenting us. That doesn’t automatically mean we’d be planning our future romance together. Anyway, between this meeting and the stories of Kristen’s encounters with Emma Watson and Jennifer Lawrence, it sounds like she was the most popular girl in Toronto last weekend!

[Photos: Getty Images]

by (@shalapitcher)

Jessica Simpson’s Weightloss Talk On Katie Brings Out Mixed Emotions For This Pregnant Lady

Jessica Simpson talked weightloss on Katie Couric's new show

I don’t know how to be objective about this subject, guys, so bear with me. Jessica Simpson appeared on the premiere of Katie Couric’s Katie today to show off her post-baby body. And to plug Weight Watchers, which she’s being paid a reported $3 million to do. As a four-months pregnant lady, I (predictably) have way too many emotions attached to this appearance. Let me classify them for you:

1) Defensive: I can’t believe how much the press has been hounding Jessica — since even before she announced her pregnancy — about gaining weight during her pregnancy. This was the Mom Jeans Incident of 2009 to the 1000th degree. This woman is a super successful fashion mogul now, not your personal fitness icon, leave her alone. I gained weight basically the instant I peed on a stick, and yeah, sometimes when I see those ladies who only look pregnant from the side, I want to crawl into a hole, but then I think about the fact that I can put aside vanity and think about someone else’s health for the first time in my life.

“I let myself indulge in everything I wanted because it was the first time I was ever pregnant, and I wanted to enjoy it,” Simpson told USA Today last week. “I wanted to be happy and eat what I wanted.” I hope the gossip world feels some shame in wanting to take away a woman’s desire to be happy.

2) Fascinated: At the same time, I have watched Jessica’s body grow with every photo, and just like everyone else, thought for one guilty moment, that there was no way she just had one baby in there. She’s my height, 5’4″, and weighed 170 lbs when she was pregnant with little Maxwell Drew. And her main indulgence is the exact same as my own: macaroni and cheese. I eat it for desert now, people. But today on Katie she also admitted that she did zero exercise during her pregnancy. When she signed onto Weight Watchers, she could barely do 800 steps a day. And she admits to a bit of magical (very Nick and Jessica-era JSimps) thinking when it comes to losing the pounds.
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by (@hallekiefer)

Sheryl Crow Blames Brain Tumor On Cell Phone Use; Everyone Else On Planet Hopes She’s Wrong

Sheryl Crow Blames Brain Tumor On Cell Phone Use

You’re going to want to throw away your Bluetooth for this one (also because it just looks dumb): Sheryl Crow believes her brain tumor is the result of prolonged cell phone use. “There are no doctors that will confirm that,” Crow revealed to Katie Couric on today’s premiere episode of Katie. “[But] I do have the theory that it’s possible that it’s related to that. I [used to spend] hours on the old archaic cell phones.” Wow, we never thought we’d be glad our parents forbade us from having a cell phone as a kid…but here we are. Here we are.

You might recall peeping the video of Sheryl forgetting the lyrics to “Soak up The Sun” at a concert back in May; it was this forgetfulness that sent the singer to a doctor in the first place, where she learned she was suffering from a benign brain tumor. “I [was] worried I had an early [onset] Alzheimer’s,” Crow admitted, pointing out that said tumor was growing in the part of her brain where she traditionally held her cellphone. Luckily Sheryl, who has also battled breast cancer, is now in recovery. On one hand, we kiiiiiiiind of want to get Sheryl a celebrity medical show costarring TomYou Don’t Even Know What Ritalin IsCruise. On the other hand…what if she’s right? We’d switch to a land line immediately. We’re not losing “If It Makes You Happy” to no tumor!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

The Notebook Director’s Incest Enthusiasm Joins The Most Insane Celebrity Quotes Of All Time

Nick Cassavetes Defends Incest In Interview

It’s not so much the “ignoring thousands of years of evolutionary programming and cultural taboos” aspect that startles us about director Nick Cassavetes‘ defense of incest. It’s more that The Notebook director would defend it out loud. To a reporter. Out loud. “Who gives a s— if people judge you?” Cassavetes declared to TheWrap while discussing his new film Yellow at the Toronto Film Festival. “I’m not saying this is an absolute but in a way, if you’re not having kids – who gives a damn? Love who you want. Isn’t that what we say? Gay marriage – love who you want? If it’s your brother or sister it’s super-weird, but if you look at it, you’re not hurting anybody except every single person who freaks out because you’re in love with one another.” And he had to compare it to gay marriage, didn’t he?

We can think of at least one difference between the two (the difference being that one is incest), but maybe the Hangover Part II actor just felt the need to defend the subject matter of his upcoming film, costarring Melanie Griffith and Sienna Miller? Of course, Cassavetes wouldn’t be the first celebrity to make a jaw-dropping statement in public. In fact, he merely joins the pantheon of baffling celeb quotes such as:

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by (@hallekiefer)

That Haircut Was Only The Beginning! Miley Cyrus A Suspect In Alleged Nightclub Brawl

Miley Cyrus Suspect In Alleged Nightclub Brawl

We knew that pompadour was the work of the devil! The fabulous, fabulous devil! We’re kidding about the malevolent nature of Miley Cyrus‘ poof, of course, but news that Miley is suspected of criminal battery following an alleged nightclub brawl is so out of character, we instinctively tried to think of some other rationale. According to TMZ, a police report filed Sunday morning alleges that the singer and fiance Liam Hemsworth got into an argument with another patron that turned physical Saturday night while at Hollywood’s Beacher’s Madhouse at the Roosevelt Hotel. In the report, the alleged victim claims he bumped into Liam’s chair, causing the Red Dawn star to turn on him…though he claims it was Cyrus who ended up “pushing him away and striking him in the face.” So that’s why we were thinking that the bleach ate through to Miley’s brain and triggered some sort of berserker state. We’re just spit-balling here, you guys! There has to be some kind of reasonable explanation, right?

Or maybe this story is so unbelievable because it, um, never actually happened. According to another eye witness, while Cyrus did turn up the sass, “Miley never threw a punch.” That makes more sense to us. Have you ever seen that girl’s Twitter account? It’s 40 percent Buddhist sayings, 60 percent puppy photos. Though photos of her hair have been taking over her Instagram…we’ve got our eye on you, Pompadour! Don’t think Miley won’t shave you off if she has to!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@shalapitcher)

Kristen Stewart Is “Totally Fine” With RPattz, Totally Cool With Jennifer Lawrence

Kristen Stewart at the Toronto Film Festival

Not only did Kristen Stewart get to enjoy the kudos surrounding On the Road during her visit to the Toronto Film Festival last week, she also had the chance to put two big rumors/fears to rest: 1) That the promotional tour for The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2 is going to be really awkward, and 2) that she has an ongoing feud with Hunger Games star Jennifer Lawrence.

When asked about the potential weirdness of promoting Breaking Dawn with Robert Pattinson, she told The Associated Press, “We’re going to be fine. We’re totally fine.”

Then Stewart and Lawrence finally quashed rumors that spread this spring about a supposed rivalry between the 22-year-old actresses. They met in person for the first time while doing press at the Intercontinental Hotel. “People who saw them said they were geeking out about each other,” a source told Us Weekly. “Kristen and Jennifer told friends they had emailed in the past but had never seen each other face to face. They’re big fans of each other.”
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