These days, you don’t know you’ve made it until someone’s shopping around a nude photo or sex tape of you — whether or not you actually made one. In 2012, we were surprised to see the sheer variety of famous people whose intimate moments and communiques were leaked, or threatened to be. Olympians, actors, princes and pop stars were all subject to exposure, much to our simultaneous horror and delight. We hope this doesn’t humiliate them anew, but we decided to recap them all here, in their many flavors:
The Leaks We Saw (and Sometimes Wish We Could Unsee):
Hulk Hogan’s Sex Tape: The weird lighting, the full sushi belly, the ringtone from his daughter’s single — so much about Hulk’s tape with Heather Clem is humiliating in its own right. But when you add the fact that it was allegedly taped by Clem’s husband, Hulk’s pal Bubba the Love Sponge, it reaches new levels of ick. No wonder Hogan originally said he didn’t remember any of this going down. We’d like to forget it too.
Prince Harry’s Strip Billiards: Here is someone we actually wouldn’t mind seeing full-monty. Except it’s kind of unfair that he was snapped while obviously drunk and unawares in the middle of a game of strip billiards in Vegas. The photo was unsatisfyingly blurry, and we felt really bad about the reaming out his grandma probably gave him.
Miley Cyrus in a Bathtub: This tastefully done nude was apparently shot by a professional photog friend of Miley’s a couple of years ago and intended for fiance Liam Hemsworth’s eyes only. That makes the gift a little less special, so it makes us a little sad.
Gymnast Danell Levya’s Sexxxy Bathroom Pics: A disgruntled ex paramour shared a handful of photos with Deadspin at the height of the U.S. Olympic gymnastics team’s fame. If the whole sports thing doesn’t work out, it looks like someone has a future in underwear modeling! Read more…
We’re not suggesting they’re doing this on purpose, mind you, but yeah, sometimes it’s a little too obvious that the rich and beautiful have wayyyy better holidays than we do. We’re stuck freezing our butts off at home, or numbing our butts off as we wait in airports going to and from relatives’ homes, while they’re showing off their perfectly toned butts in tiny bikinis in Hawaii. OK, rant off. Instead, we will ring in the new year by vicariously enjoying how hot Brandy looks in Hawaii right after announcing her engagement; what incredible bodies Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux have, how happy Sofia Vergara looks on that boat, how comfortable Jessica Simpson is with her second pregnancy cleave, how the sun loves Rita Ora by the pool, how naughty Rihanna is in that photo we can’t post here and how nice in the one we can … Well, just check these all out for yourself. And if you find yourself feeling bitter again, just remember that they probably can’t indulge in that second glass of eggnog like you can.
[Photos: Splash News Online, WhoSay]
As with most baby pics, there’s not much we can add to the latest photo of Blue Ivy Carter that Beyonce posted on her Tumblr this week. We’ll just say, “Thank you” to the proud mama, for sharing more cuteness — even if she never shows us little Blue’s face, and even though she and Jay-Z went to Bergdorf’s on Christmas Eve and forgot to buy us anything.
Anyway, we thought we’d take this opportunity to remind you once more why Blue is our #7 Celebrity Who Dominated in 2012 with this gallery of the few times we’ve caught a glimpse of the little star:
[Photos: Splash News Online, Tumblr]
If you’ve looked at Miley Cyrus‘ Twitter at any point for any amount of time, you obviously know one thing: the woman loves her dogs! She loves pups Floyd, Happy, Mary Jane, Ziggy (her gift to Liam Hemsworth) and the late Lila so much in fact, she is constantly smooching them, a habit some haters seem to take umbrage with. “If one more person tweets me I’m gross for f—ing kissing my puppies I am gonna show you some real sick s— people do to dogs ok,” Cyrus raged last night. Haha, oh Miley! That’s the opposite of what everyone wants to see!
On one hand, we get it. There might be an upward limit on the number of dog kisses some people want to see online in a day. On the other hand…haven’t you ever smooched an adorable pup? Are we the only ones who understand the slobbery joy of dog love? Are the haters really so immune to man’s best friend? So we thought we’d get Miley’s back by hyping her cutest pup smooching pics for your enjoyment. If you still think it’s gross, we think Miley put it best: “It’s all love. Remember what Thumper said “If you don’t have something nice to say shut the hell up!” Or something like that.” Indeed.
[Photo: Miley Cyrus' Twitter]
We have long thought of Tyler Perry’s Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor as that movie Kim Kardashian went to film right after she announced her divorce from Kris Humphries (and also now as a movie whose title is really annoying to type out). But after watching the trailer, which premiered on Yahoo! yesterday, we are now thinking of it differently. Never mind that it opens with Kim reading a stiff line of dialogue and gracing the screen with her figure in a particularly snug white dress. We don’t even care much that Brandy and Vanessa Williams show their beautiful faces for a split second. This movie is all about Jurnee Smollett, whose moment of real stardom may have finally come (at the ripe old age of 26).
Some of you may remember Jurnee as little Denise from Full House and Hanging With Mr. Cooper. Or even as 10-year-old Eve from Eve’s Bayou. She impressed many with her skills in Denzel Washington‘s The Great Debaters. But some of us will always think of her as the fierce Jess Merriweather who taught Landry how to kick a ball and helped Vince put his mom in rehab on Friday Night Lights. With her warm brown eyes and expressive mouth, this beauty can make us cry and cower in the space of 10 seconds.
Now that she’s at the center of Perry’s latest work, playing a marriage counselor in a troubled marriage of her own while being relentlessy wooed by a social media mogul, we hope everyone gets clued in to Jurnee’s star power. We’ll know more when the movie comes out next March. Until then, here’s a look at Jurnee’s, um, journey, through the years:
Naturally, we have all sorts of reservations about embracing the Miss Universe pageant and all it represents — Donald Trump runs it, it sets a bad example for little girls about beauty mattering more than brains, and all that stuff. But today we’re putting those aside, because we really feel OK embracing the newly crowned Olivia Culpo, who came up from the ranks of Miss Rhode Island and Miss USA, actually seems like a pretty cool girl … in addition to being drop-dead gorgeous in a bikini and an evening gown, of course, and maybe possibly winning the heart of one Mr. Ryan Lochte. Here’s our logic:
1) She’s the first Miss USA to earn the title since 1997 and the first Miss Rhode Island to win it ever. We think New England deserves some good news this week.
2) She’s a music geek. She’s played the cello since age 6, performed at Carnegie Hall with a youth orchestra at age 12, and went to the same music camp (Brevard, in North Carolina) as some of our own friends. Watch her play a bit here.
3) Miss Rhode Island was the Boston University student’s first-ever pageant, and she entered it wearing a dress she rented for $20 on Rent the Runway.
4) She’s not fancy. She told Shape that her biggest craving during the Miss USA contest was peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
5) She believes transgender women deserve to compete in the contest too. “I feel like in America, we all have the right to be happy and the right to live freely, so that’s how I stand on it,” she told BU Today. “It all goes back to the foundation of this country and freedom of choice.”
So, congrats, girl! We fully encourage you to celebrate your victory with a certain Olympic gold medalist soon — just ’cause we’d love to see those photos.
We’ve made no secret of the fact that Vampire Diaries witch and pop star Kat Graham is one of our favorite triple threats on the scene. And though she was only at the VH1 DIVAS concert to present Metric, she pulled at least one diva move — changing her outfit between the purple carpet and the stage. She showed off her first gown, by Alpana Neeraj, to VH1′s guest correspondent Jackie Christie — and the two shared a cute moment over their side-swept hairstyles in the video above.
But we haven’t yet heard who designed the second one, which was sheer on the bottom instead of the top, showing off her gams the way the good witch Bonnie never gets to do.
Onstage at VH1 DIVAS tonight, the name of the game was the glitzier the better, as befits a dance-themed show. But before the likes of Miley Cyrus, Adam Lambert, Keri Hilson and more hit the stage in their best studded leather and sequins, they all had very different ideas of how to approach the purple carpet. It was just the kind of daring and diversity that makes these artists the perfect guests for a celebration of diva-tude. There was Demi Lovato looking rockabilly cute and Ciara doing old-Hollywood glam. Jordin Sparks and Bootsy Collins sparkled, while Brandy and Kat Graham donned edgy white and ivory.
Whatever their approach, none of these ladies and gentlemen was about to fade into the crowd.
[Photos: Getty Images]
With Jessica Alba, Ed Helms and Megan Fox announcing the nominees for the 2013 Golden Globe Awards, we thought maybe there would be a few more unconventional choices this year. But alas, there was not a single Magic Mike nomination in sight. Instead, historical fare like Lincoln, Argo and Django Unchained led the pack on the movie side, while Game Change and Homeland took over on TV. With Les Miserables and Silver Linings Playbook dominating the comedy/musical categories, we’re kind of leaving it up to the older ladies of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel — and Jack Black — to make this a less serious occasion. Also, apparently we need to check out Salmon Fishing in Yemen, since that little-seen Ewan McGregor/Emily Blunt flick nabbed a few nods (and we’re trying not to hold Beasts of the Southern Wild’s snub against it). But we are happy that New Girl, Girls, Downton Abbey and Nashville are bringing some awesome girl power to the event, which will be appropriately hosted by Amy Poehler and Tina Fey on January 15. Check out the full list of nominees below.
Best Picture, Drama
Life of Pi
Zero Dark Thirty
Best Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical
Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
Salmon Fishing In The Yemen
Silver Linings Playbook
Ben Affleck, Argo
Kathryn Bigelow, Zero Dark Thirty
Ang Lee, Life of Pi
Steven Spielberg, Lincoln
Quentin Tarantino, Django Unchained
Best Actor, Musical or Comedy
Jack Black, Bernie
Bradley Cooper, Silver Linings Playbook
Hugh Jackman, Les Miserables
Ewan MCGregor, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen
Bill Murray, Hyde Park on Hudson
Best Actress, Musical or Comedy
Emily Blunt, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen
Judi Dench, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
Jennifer Lawrence, Silver Linings Playbook
Maggie Smith, Quartet
Meryl Streep, Hope Springs
There’s a reason we’re bloggers and not rocket scientists or statisticians here — numbers ain’t our strong suit — but for the greater good, we decided to do a little counting, just to see where this year’s great movies stand so far in the Awards Season 2013 race. From the Gotham Awards to the National Review Board, the Spirit Awards to the Critics’ Choice — which was just announced today — we are keeping score now. And this is all leading up to Thursday’s Golden Globes nominations announcement.
This early in the game, with no different weight given to the different types of boards awarding nominations and kudos (or the different awards, be they for costume design or best feature), this is where the movies stand:
Silver Linings Playbook: 29
Les Miserables: 23
The Master: 21
Zero Dark Thirty: 19
Beasts of the Southern Wild: 17
Moonrise Kingdom: 16
Life of Pi: 14
The Sessions: 10
Django Unchained: 6
If nothing else, this should give you a good idea of which movies you need to add to your list before January!
[Photos: Universal Pictures, Twentieth Century Fox, The Weinstein Company, Warner Bros.]