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Joan Collins To Terrify Brits Into Dressing Smart

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Alexis Carrington is back and she’s taking no style prisoners! Magically timed to coincide with the return of 80′s shoulder pads and fluoro colors, Joan Collins is to present a new prime-time show on British TV called Joan Does Glamour bullying showing drab women how to dress like a power-crazed H.B.I.C.

“For too long it has been acceptable to wander around in T-shirts, trainers and low slung sweat pants.  I want to show British women that you don’t need a designer budget to achieve a glamorous and timeless style and that if people took a bit more care of their appearance, they might feel a little bit better about themselves,” she says.

Gulp. Is that a promise, or a threat? Shame she’s limited her search to British women – we’d love her to get her perfectly-manicured talons on Britney Spears and Samantha Ronson. [Photo: Splash News Online]

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50 Celebrity Makeovers: Vote Fab Or Fail!

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One would think that Hollywood celebrities could only achieve otherworldy hotness by hiring stylists or trainers or dieticians — and maybe even slapping fine Porcelain veneers on their teeth or having the fat sucked out of their hips and/or tummies or bumping up their bra size a notch or two or three. But one would be right only part of the time.

You see, some celebs prove there’s a fine line between the pursuit and realization of hotness and total freakishness. We have compiled 50 stars who’ve had Hollywood-esque makeovers. After the jump, look at their before and after pictures — and for each makeover cast your vote “Fab or Fail.”

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by (@katespencer)

Angelina Jolie Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

Mama Angelina Jolie wasn’t always the serene queen of kids that she is today. The daughter of actor Jon Voight, Angie started working as a model at the age of 14. As a teen, the star embraced anything and everything gothic, sporting dark clothes and experimenting with tattoos. (She has over a dozen, with ink written in Khmer, Latin and Arabic.) When Angelina accepted the Best Supporting Actress Award for her work in Girl, Interrupted, she rocked a skin-tight, midnight black gown and lengthy hair extensions that matched in color.

But the starlet softened as she transformed into a nurturing mother, first to son Maddox and now to an ever-expanding clan of kids. She traded in the vile of blood she once wore around her neck for simple, silhouette-hugging clothes and comfortable ballet flats. On the red carpet, Angelina outshines her fellow A-Listers with stunning gowns and minimal jewels, allowing her gorgeous face to be the main focus of her look. Of course, arm candy like Brad Pitt doesn’t hurt!

Do you prefer the Hot Mess Angelina of yesterday or the Ms. Sophisticated Mom of present?

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by (@katespencer)

Gwen Stefani Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

When No Doubt first exploded onto the music scene in 1995, leader singer Gwen Stefani flaunted a fashion sense that was part punk, part ska, a bit hip-hop and totally her own. She sported henna tattoos on her hands and rocked bindis in between her eyes, with her pink hair twisted in a mound of knots on her head. She made a name for herself for singing her heart out while bouncing around onstage and for flaunting her ripped abs every chance she got.

After a bout with braces brought her fabulousness to a stand-still, Gwen transformed from a rocker chick to super chic. She released a hit solo album that celebrated her obsession with Japan’s fashion freaks, the harajuku girls, and launched her still successful clothing line, L.A.M.B. Even though Gwen’s current look is more SoHo than SoCal, her style remains strictly her own.

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Samantha Ronson Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

Samantha Ronson morphed from cutesy spawn of British socialites to hard-rocking celebrity DJ who used skinny Lindsay Lohan as a piece of arm candy. Coming from an artistically talented and wealthy family, it was only natural that Samantha would be interested in music. But who knew she would go from pop princess to punk? Before ruling the club scene with her punk-chic aesthetic, Samantha released some sugary rock tracks. In the video for her single “Pull My Hair Out,” she bebops to fluffy lines while dancing with human-sized lollipops and a cat wearing a tiara. Having traded in her pink T-shirts for ripped jeans and long hair for short, the all-new Sam is an international club DJ who rocks a tough celesbian look. She’s often spotted hunkered over with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth and sometimes shouts expletives at the paparazzi while giving them the middle finger. Fab or fail?

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by (@katespencer)

Heidi Montag Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

Heidi Montag spent the first and second season of The Hills being upstaged by everyone around her – her prettier BFF Lauren Conrad, her devil-spawn albino boyfriend Spencer Pratt, and that dog her ex-boyfriend Jordan gifted her. So girlfriend took matters into, well, someone else’s hands, and remedied the situation with a new nose and a pair of enormous breasts. Goodbye A-cup! Hello 32-Cs!

“People would say, ‘You have such a big nose!’” she told Us Magazine in 2007. “And they’d make fun of me for being so flat…I was tormented.” So tormented, in fact, that she told Access Hollywood, “Right before I went in, I was like, What if I don’t wake up? Oh, this is scary. Then I thought, I don’t care. If I don’t wake up, it’s worth it. I just wanted it so badly.” Lucky for her the surgeries were completed without a hitch. Now the only thing tormenting her is Spencer!

Do you think her transformation has been fab or fail? Vote!

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Clay Aiken Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

When Clay Aiken hit the second season of American Idol, the four-eyed dweeb of the audition transformed into a spiky-haired superstar by the finals (which he lost). His debut album, Measure Of A Man, was a hit with the Claymates, but his singles failed to dominate the pop chart. And so came some less successful makeovers.

Clay grew his hair into a brown mop for his 2006 album, A Thousand Ways, and by the end of the year he had a full-blown mane. The album was a flop, and for the follow-up he tried on a blond mane (Spamalot’s fault?) — only to be dropped by his label soon after. He’s recently returned to his classic Idol look, but we almost wish he’d stuck with the dye job. Do you?

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Diddy Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

Sean Combs was a driven college student at Howard University who shuttled himself between New York and Washington as an intern until he climbed the ranks as a young executive at Uptown Records. Puffy then established his own label, Bad Boy Records and was often seen standing behind Notorious B.I.G. in his music videos uttering one word phrases and pumping his fist.

But soon Puffy stepped out of B.I.G.’s shadow and debuted an album of his own, under the name Puff Daddy. Puff Daddy was no longer a scruffy kid with a T-shirt and baseball cap, but a designer suit-wearing entrepreneur who parlayed his musical success into roles as clothing and cologne designer, Broadway actor, and television producer. Known now as Diddy, the globetrotter has become a regular on red carpets around the world and is celebrated as the host of the annual, ultra-exclusive “White Party” in St. Tropez.

Is Diddy all fab? Or all floss? Vote!

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Mickey Rourke Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

Mickey Rourke had a youthful glow reminiscent of James Dean when he made women everywhere fall in love with him as the star of films like 1986′s 9 and ½ Weeks. After admittedly letting his Hollywood lifestyle get out of control, Mickey plummeted into a has-been who worked the European boxing circuit. He rose again just last year as the star of The Wrestler, for which he was nominated for an Oscar.

While the old Mickey’s back on the Hollywood scene, people can’t help but notice that he looks a little different. He attributes his mangled-looking face to the work of a bad plastic surgeon who tried to fix damage done in the ring (two broken noses, one smashed cheekbone). Now Mickey is sporting fancy shoes, shiny jackets, shaggy hair and designer shades.  Is the all-new Mickey fab or fail?

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by (@katespencer)

Sarah Jessica Parker Makeover: Fab Or Fail?

It took a little bit of sex and one stylish city to transform Sarah Jessica Parker from a nerdy child star to every fashion designer’s favorite muse. The curly-haired cutie first won over fans when she starred on Broadway as beloved orphan Annie, and her dorkier fans (us included) adored her on the 80s sitcom Square Pegs. After a slew of mediocre movie roles, she solidified star status playing Carrie Bradshaw on every woman’s favorite guilty pleasure, Sex and the City.

While her character was known for being a fearless fashion plate addicted to Manolos, Parker maintained Bradshaw’s adventurous style in her own life. Even though her daring red carpet choices sometimes get the critics squawking, there’s no doubt that Parker has become one of the most cosmopolitan stars this side of Park Avenue. We think Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda would agree. But do you?