RPattz fans, rejoice! The sulky-looking Twilight hunk will not age too badly, at least according to Joe Mullins, a forensic artist who used computer technology to predict what celebs will look like after another decade. If he’s willing to trim his wayward eyebrows, Robert Pattinson may still be capable of landing roles that require some sex appeal. Do you think Robert looks like a heartthrob in this rendering? Check the gallery to see what more actors might look like in 2020, including Kristen Stewart.
Kristin Chenoweth, who’s hosting the Critics’ Choice Movie Awards this year, kicks some werewolf butt in this new Twilight-inspired promo for the show. It’s not hard to guess where she falls in the Team Edwards/Team Jacob debate. Not only is the Lautner look-alike in the video the wimpiest werewolf that ever snarled, Kristin slaps him because Robert Pattinson isn’t more central to “New Moon.” Ouch.
Catch more of the itty-bitty actress with the unforgettable voice at the Critics’ Choice Movie Awards live on VH1 on Jan. 15 at 8PM EST and use the Critics’ Choice Tweet Tracker to keep up with what’s hot this awards season.
“Hey! Yoohoo! Over here! Yes, it’s me, Ashley Greene, star of the Twilight movie, and, well, that other Twilight movie! Yes, I know you’d rather be staring at Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart right now, but they’re off in a bunker somewhere reading indie scripts and making out with each other in a pile of their own hair grease. But I’m here! Two years ago I was a coat-check girl, and now I’m strolling the red carpet at the Sherlock Holmes premiere, hunting down Jude Law to try to get in on that sweet baby-daddy action. Just kidding, guys! Kind of. Anyhoodles, I know this amorphous white sack doesn’t show off my curves, but my stylist told me that’s what fashion is all about. And check out these lips, mo-fos! They’re pink! Hot pink! Looklooklooklooklooklooklook! Mememememememe! I’m famous! I’m unforgettable! I’m destined for a career of Lifetime movies alongside Tori Spelling! Wait, did I just say that?“
[The above monologue is imagined, of course.]
Finally we get to see Kristen Stewart‘s mullet in action! The first Runaways teaser trailer is out, but it doesn’t give too much about the film away, other than it being a film about 70′s girl power, rock n’ roll and Dakota Fanning looking insanely sexy in a feathered wig. (Yes, we feel uncomfortable typing that.)
Perhaps the most interesting part of the clip is not what we see, but we we hear: Kristen Stewart belting out “Cherry Bomb,” the badass chick anthem which we’re eager to see make a comeback on the charts a la “Bohemian Rhapsody” via the Wayne’s World soundtrack back in the 90s.
Watch – and listen – above.
“American Idol” star Adam Lambert is a self-professed Twilight fan, and now the singer wants his piece of the Twi pie. In an interview with MTV, the scandalous singer revealed that he’d love for one of his songs to be featured on the upcoming Eclipse soundtrack. Wouldn’t we all? (Eh, Glambert’s chances are probably a little better than ours.) Check it out above.
We were chatting with our lady pals at PopEater today about the conversation going around that it’s somehow creepy to admire Taylor Lautner‘s ripped bod because he’s 17 years old and thus, “illegal.” Well, we’re giving you permission to drool, Tay-fans. Never mind the fact that he’ll be 18 in just 2.5 short months (2/11/10, OMG!), but isn’t it time we women we’re allowed to get a little creepy with our objects of lust? After all, no one thought twice about the hordes of grown men obsessively ogling at Britney, Lindsay and The Olsen Twins through out their teen years. Why the web was – and still is – full of clocks counting down the seconds until Mary-Kate and Ashley became legal to date (as if they’d touch any of you middle-aged pervs).
So the time has come for the women of America to have their moment. The dude’s on the cover of Rolling Stone in a wet t-shirt, for Christ’s sake! What else are we do to? For the record, it’s not illegal to fawn over his body, it’s just not really kosher to touch it in some states before he turns 18 – California being one of them. But hey – if you come across him in Montana and things get (consensually) hot and heavy, it’s 100% legal! [Photo: RollingStone]
Taylor Lautner sat down with Conan O’Brien on The Tonight Show last night, glowing with the knowledge that New Moon made almost three times its budget in one weekend. After describing a fan riot in Brazil (“there were flexi-cuffs on the doors…[they] just went Pop! Pop! Pop!”), the underage werewolf broke down the three types of fangirls he encounters while gallivanting across the globe to hawk his vampire movie/money-printing machine. They are as follows:
- Screamers: “The most mild fan…usually we do not meet fans who do not scream.”
- Criers: “You feel really bad…you want to do something, so you grab their hand or give them a hug, and it just gets worse. Then they are literally on their knees crying.”
- Hyperventilators: “You don’t really have to worry that much, because they just pass out. They just *snaps* are gone.”
Wait, what about adult women uncomfortable with Bella’s extreme passivity but can’t stop watching anyway? And those moms who want Taylor to sign their underwear? Maybe they all scream too. As funny as Lautner’s anecdotes were, the highlight of the interview was when Conan revealed the junior athlete can catch grapes in his mouth from a long distance. Watch the feat—along with yet another shirtless clip from New Moon—after the jump.
We’re sure Ashley Greene wasn’t purposely trying to plug starvation as a weight-loss method when asked by reporters about how she stayed skinny for “New Moon.” The poor girl’s barely been in any movies, so she’s a bit, uh, green when it comes to repeating rehearsed lines prepped for her by her publicist. At least that’s what we assume happened when Ash gave this obnoxious comment to Us Magazine. “It was really easy,” said the actress, when asked how she stayed svelte. “We were working 12 hours a day, so it didn’t leave too much time to eat.”
Even more priceless is this observation from the mag: “After her response, her publicist nudged her, but Greene didn’t seem to care about her blunt answer.”
Blunt seems like a very nice way of calling Greene’s answer straight-up stupid, which we’re happy to do even if Us won’t. Regardless of how inexperienced one is with dealing with the press, shouldn’t stars know that providing thinspiration to their tween fans is totally taboo? [Photo: GettyImages]
Now that we’ve revealed the Five Cheesiest Moments from The Twilight Saga: New Moon, let’s discuss what made the Twi-hards go wild. Here are our top five favorite moments from the much-anticipated sequel. Spoilers ahead!
5. We’ll be honest. We thought Anna Kendrick‘s role as Jessica in Twilight was annoying and poorly acted. Homegirl stepped it up for New Moon! She provided some of the most (intentionally) funny moments in the film as she frankly expressed her annoyance with Bella’s depression and lack of appreciation for shopping.
Our top four moments after the jump…
Twilight Saga: New Moon review time! We caught New Moon last night (yes, squeee!), and while the movie will undoubtedly make Twi-hards bubble over with excitement as the title card rolls, the much-anticipated film was filled with moments of ridiculous lines, shots, and less-than-Pixar quality animation. [Ed. note: While Taylor Lautner standing in the rain shirtless, above, may seem to qualify as cheese-tastic, there were far too many squeals of joy in the theater for us to knock it.]
Here are our top five most unintentionally hilarious moments (and yes, there are spoilers up ahead):
5. The animated wolves. If they looked fake on the big screen, we can’t imagine how horrible they’ll be on our 27″ screens on DVD.
Four more Velveeta-licious moments after the jump!