Orange-Skinned Keith Urban Gunning For Gig As Male Snooki

by (@katespencer)

Holy SPF 4. Keith Urban rolled into the Academy of Country Music Awards last night looking more like Snooki than, well, Snooki herself. Wife Nicole Kidman‘s alabaster skin only highlighted his serious tanning bed addiction. Between the straightened hair, the orange skin, the open shirt and the tribal tatt, Keith seems ready to fist pump the night away. No offense Nic – we’re sure he’s sweet and all, but Keith is seriously damaging your A-List cred like whoa.

Other stars spotted on the ACMAs red carpet last night: Taylor Swift looking typically Taylorish, Carrie Underwood in eggplant, that kinda hot Ryan Gosling-ish dude from Lady Antebellum, Julianne Hough and a prom-ready Miranda Lambert. Pics below.

Emma Roberts Struts Her Short Shorts, Leggings In LA

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Emma Roberts is set to star in Adult World next year, about a young poet working in a porn store, so maybe this outfit qualified as research. The Scream 4 actress strutted past the paparazzi in short shorts, heels and leggings this weekend, giving a surprise show for the crew that was previously chasing Whitney Port across the street. Hopefully the horror sequel’s a hit, so that paparazzi will be paying attention once the 20-year-old reveals her summer wardrobe.

See more photos of Emma in the gallery below.

[Photo: Splash News Online/]

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Jeremy Renner Taking Over Bourne AND Mission: Impossible?

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Hollywood practically ignored Jeremy Renner for the near-decade between his amazing turn in Dahmer and his Oscar-nominated Hurt Locker performance, but they seem to be making up for lost time. Despite the fact that he’s already filming a new Mission: Impossible film with Tom Cruise, Latino Review says Renner is Universal’s top choice to star in The Bourne Legacy, where he’d not so much replace Matt Damon as Jason Bourne but play another secret agent undergoing a rather Bourney predicament (far younger actors Jake Gyllenhaal and Garrett Hedlund were previously rumored for the role). Could the 40-year-old Renner really take over two of the biggest action franchises? If this guy can rock a British accent, Daniel Craig better watch his back!

Whether or not he gets the Bourne gig (shouldn’t they get someone who isn’t Matt’s age?), Renner has plenty of action cash coming—he’s already shooting both Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters and Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, and there’s this little movie called The Avengers coming in 2012. Word dropped last week that Renner will cameo in Thor, out later this month, introducing audiences to his super-archer Hawkeye. If these films do well, the long-underrated actor could find himself one of Hollywood’s biggest stars.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Arnold So Confident About New Superhero, 3-D Film Already In Works

by (@hallekiefer)

Never a man with a short supply of self-confidence, Arnold Schwarzenegger is really going all out with his superhero/public servant character. Because who doesn’t love a cartoon action star who is also an election official and that no one has ever heard of before?  It’s a million dollar idea! After announcing his new character The Governator last week, Schwarzenegger premiered The Governator trailer for his upcoming TV show, featuring guest star Larry King. The kids are going to go wild! Based on the clip, we can look forward to Arnie voicing a Terminator reboot with slightly more evil robots. Arnold even beats someone up with a giant letter ‘L’. For legislation, we’re assuming!

Schwarzenegger is already so certain that his alter-ego will be a hit, he also announced today that he’s planning a Governator 3-D film. Yeah, seems like a safe bet to make a movie about a completely new character with no established fan base (moms who liked Jingle all The Way excluded). “First will come (The Governator) comic books, then a (cartoon) TV series and after that we will develop the games and then a movie,” Schwarzenegger told reporters in Cannes today. “Maybe then we’ll be back in Cannes for that.” Sure, Arnold, and then Sundance after that! Maybe the next time Arnold says “I’m back,” it’ll be on stage at the Academy Awards. Looks like Annette Benning is going to spend yet another year with her hands balled into fists of rage.

Read more…

DID HE DO THAT? Principal Institutes “Urkel Dress Code Initiative”

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A middle school principal in Memphis has implemented a new “Urkel Initiative” to crack down on his students’ saggy-pants dress code violations and to get mentioned on pop culture blogs so that we can all be like “Did He Do That? Principal Institutes ‘Urkel Dress Code Initiative’” and remember Urkel and all high-five our monitors.

The policy barely has anything to do with Urkel (no one even gets asked if they want cheese), but I still understand the motivation — nothing resonates with the middle school children of 2011 than a decade-old family sitcom about a nerd who built a moonwalking robot version of himself:

Hunger Games Casting Announced: Katniss Gets Her Peeta And Gale

by (@katespencer)

It’s official: Josh Hutcherson has been cast as Peeta and Liam Hemsworth will play Gale in The Hunger Games. First, let’s get this out of our system: AHHHHHH! We’ve been so anxious about when they’d announce this news that we just need to let it out a bit, ya know? Regardless of who you were rooting for to land these parts, it’s just exciting that the movie is moving forward and is one step closer to the big screen. We know lots of people had other stars picked out for Peeta and Gale, but we’d encourage fans not to fret. We recall a time a few years ago when a British unknown named Robert Pattinson was announced as the lead in Twilight and some fans of the books were horrified. But now could you imagine the franchise (er, and your life?) without Rob? We shudder at the thought!

We’re psyched to give Josh and Liam a chance and look forward to seeing what they bring to the table opposite the lovely Jennifer Lawrence. What do you think of the news? Shout it out, mockingjays! And then let’s cast Haymitch, Prim and Rue!

[Photos: GettyImages/]

Will Guy Freaking Out Alone On DC Subway Become The Next Meme?

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There is a new video going viral today. It is a phone-cam recording of a man named Yonathan Elias realizing he is alone on a DC Metro car and then going happy-style-crazy-go-nuts about it.

(Slightly NSFW language)

Okay, so now let’s figure out if this is going to get meme-ified. Will this get a couple million views? Will copy cat videos come out featuring college kids running around the library at night yelling “I’m actin’ a fool in the library by myself!”? Will an a Capella group get their terrible beat boxer to back them up while they sing “I can jump, ah-ah! I can do whatever I want, ah-ah!”? It’s hard to say. It would be nice if it did though. It would be a solid replacement for Rebecca Black‘s Friday. We’re all about ready to start moving on from that. Your thoughts?…

Thanks, Urlesque.

In 1996, Bob Dole Was Keepin’ It Gangsta

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Picture it: Miami, Florida, 1996. The city I was born and raised in. I was 15 years old, around 5’10″, loving dark lipsticks, and even more Asian looking than anyone could have imagined or hoped for. It was this year that, due to circumstances beyond my control (namely, an older brother deeply entrenched in Republican politics, not named Alex P. Keaton) that my family found ourselves at Versailles, one of the oldest and most famous Cuban restaurants on Calle Ocho in Miami’s Little Havana.

It was there that this happened:

Yes, that is Bob Dole, doing his best impression of a Louis Vuitton garment bag, flanked by my Mother Judy Collins, and indeed, myself, far right, 15, and crazy looking. You will notice my Mother has revealed perhaps more decolletage than necessary, as per usual. And those of you wondering what is around the very handsome Mr. Dole’s neck: He is donning a beaded Cuban flag necklace, handed to him by a local youngster outside. Does this make him a Crip or a Blood?

(Ed. note: If I ever “make it,” I fear this will be the photo people use as a before nose job pic, even though I have never had or have been able to afford one.)

Charlie Sheen Pulls Off Chicago Show, Hopes For Two And A Half Men Return

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Will Charlie Sheen‘s epic meltdown just wind up a Conan O’Brien-esque cultural hiccup? Though Sheen’s Detroit show ended in boos and outrage, Sunday’s gig in Chicago went much more smoothly. Realizing his fans were more familiar with the boorish whimsy of Two And A Half Men than the  psychedelic rants found on Charlie Sheen’s Korner, Sheen scrapped the poetry and incoherent video clips for his sophomore soiree, instead sitting with an on-stage interviewer. While it still sounds like a snooze fest (Charlie smoked pot with the late Chris Penn? Titillating!), the audience didn’t get violent, cheering loudly as he traded shirts with a fan, took questions and—sigh—called his ex-wives “kidnapper bitches.”

Not that the show was a total success—though “sold out” plenty of tickets were available from psuedo-scalpers like StubHub. Maybe that’s why Charlie says he’d return to Two And A Half Men, despite considering the show runners to be “bloodsuckers.” Assuming Charlie can keep from relapsing beforehand (and that’s a big assumption), could he manage a total comeback? While networks all over the world would love to have the moneymaking show back, Chuck Lorre and the others who actually have to work with him might feel otherwise.

See photos from Charlie’s tour in the gallery below.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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