Report: Meg Ryan And John Mellencamp Are Dating

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John Mellencamp & Meg Ryan

Looks like John Mellencamp and Meg Ryan aren’t “just friends” after all. People reports that the pair have been dating for almost two months, recently being spotted in Martha’s Vineyard and NYC. “She usually comes in by herself or with her daughter,” said a witness who spotted Ryan grocery shopping with Johnny Cougar. “I thought that was her husband because they seemed for comfortable and familiar with each other, just like an old married couple.”

Actually, Ryan hasn’t been tied down since splitting with Dennis Quaid in 2001, but John just split with wife Elaine Irwin Mellencamp after nearly 20 years of marriage. People’s sources claim that the Mellencamps were secretly separated for months before things got serious with Meg. We’re inclined to believe it, as it’s hard to imagine one would trade their banging hot model wife/mother-of-your-children for Meg Ryan in 2010. No, Meg Ryan is what you go for after you become a short, single 59-year-old with a pompadour.

[Photos: Getty Images]

David Arquette “Was In A Lot Of Pain” On Scream 4, Says Director

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David Arquette & Courteney Cox

Way to make your movie sound like a fun time, Wes Craven! The Scream 4 director must have forgotten he was trying to promote a horror comedy when commented to Entertainment Weekly about David Arquette‘s recent trip to rehab. “I’m glad to hear that David is going into rehab. I saw him a little bit more because he was present during more of the shoot than Courteney. He was in a lot of pain, so it’s good that he’s getting some help.” Great, so not only are they dragging Deputy Dewey out for one last go-round, he’s going to look like a drunken wreck about to lose his wife. And Courteney’s barely in the movie, too? Excitement abounds.

“Frankly, none of us knew anything was going on [during filming],”  Craven said of Courteney and David’s eparation. “I don’t know what their problems are, but it’s not that they hate each other that’s for sure. It’s something else.” Gee, maybe it was whatever you thought was causing David “a lot of pain,” Wes? Hopefully he’ll find a new angle for promoting the film before its April release date. While the idea of watching David Arquette wince in agony does have a certain Saw appeal, we can’t imagine many paying $10 for the privilege.

[Photo: WireImage]

FABLife’s DVD Picks Of The Week

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Machete & The Last Exorcism

The year begins with two smart twists on film genre. Machete grew out of a trailer in Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez‘s tribute to ’70s exploitation Grindhouse. As a full-length feature, it’s a sugar-addicted ADD kid on the rampage, giddily lurching from one guilty pleasure to the next, whether it’s a man playing Tarzan with someone’s entrails or Jessica Alba in the shower. Danny Trejo, his pock-marked face familiar from a hundred straight-to-DVD slam-bangers, is the Mexican superhero who takes up blades against a trio of villains that includes Don Johnson‘s sh*tkicker and an anti-immigration senator mugged furiously by Robert De Niro. To say that Stephen Seagal gives the performance of a lifetime may sound like damning with faint praise, but like everything else in this five-alarm flick, it’s something to see.

The Last Exorcism would seem like a Blair Witch wannabe if it wasn’t so smart about character. A professional exorcist hopes to expose the theatre at the heart of his profession by ridding a bayou farm girl of her “demons.” What at first seems like a confrontation between two fakers haunted by worldlier spirits turns out to be much more. The mockumentary format serves the scares well, especially when the troubled girl drags the camera into the Satanic action, and Patrick Fabian and Ashley Bell would deserve award notice if the world wasn’t so easily blinded by stuttering kings.

Extras: Machete has deleted scenes and an “audience reaction” track. Viewers will have to bring their own Tecate six-pack. The Last Exorcism includes a pair of commentary tracks, a making of featurette and an extended segment on real-life exorcisms.

– By C. Bottomley

You Get A James Van Der Beek GIF! And YOU Get A James Van Der Beek GIF!

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Okay, internet. Alright. You got us. We will all like this for a day and a half.

There is a new website called jamesvandermemes.com that is made up entirely of GIFS showing James Van Der Beek expressing various emotions. You know… emotions. Like sadness and happiness.

“Watching James Van Der Beek GIFS on the internet might have been the opportunity of your life time. But I don’t want… your life.” – Your Teenage Son To You

Anyway, go ahead and look at that website for exactly 4 minutes. James Van Der Beek appreciates it.

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Brett Favre And The Jets Get Sued For Harassment

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Geez, you send a lady photos of your penis once and all of a sudden you’re a sexual harasser. Brett Favre has been under fire for a few months now, ever since he allegedly sent lewd texts to New York Jets sideline reporter Jenn Sterger and it’s about to get worse.

He was already fined $50k for his behavior, but now Favre is being sued by two more women who claim he sexually harassed them in 2008. The Jets are also named in the suit, which was filed by two of the team’s former massage therapists, Christina Scavo and Shannon O’Toole. The women claim that Favre propositioned them for a three-way, texting O’Toole with the message “Brett here, you and Crissy want to get together, I’m all alone.” After demanding apologies and rejecting his advances, the women say they were not hired back for their services, which is why they filed the suit.

Favre had no comment on the allegations, but you just know he wants this story to have a happy ending.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Gwyneth Talks Postpartum Depression: “I Felt Like A Failure”

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Snarksters who like to call Gwyneth Paltrow the worst, get ready to feel bad—turns out the actress briefly agreed with you. Gwyneth told Good Housekeeping all about her experience with postpartum depression in their new cover story.  “I felt like a zombie. I couldn’t access my heart. I couldn’t access my emotions. I couldn’t connect,” she says about the months after her second child, Moses, was born. “It was the exact opposite of what had happened when Apple was born. With her, I was on cloud nine. I couldn’t believe it wasn’t the same. I just thought it meant I was a terrible mother and a terrible person.” Keep it down, peanut gallery.

Gwyneth says it was her husband Chris Martin that forced her to admit she had a problem. “I thought postpartum depression meant you were sobbing every single day and incapable of looking after a child. But there are different shades of it and depths of it, which is why I think it’s so important for women to talk about it. It was a trying time. I felt like a failure.” Understandably, she sounds grateful for the boost. “I can depend on [Chris]. He makes me laugh. He’s really appreciative of me. You know, he makes me feel special.” Woah, Gwyneth acting like one wouldn’t naturally be appreciative of her? What happened to the GOOPster we knew and were annoyed by?

Maybe Not The Best Idea We’ve Heard: Lindsay Lohan Moves Next Door To Sam Ronson

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Yesterday, when news of Lindsay Lohan‘s release from rehab was confirmed, we joked that her first order of business would be drunk-Tweeting Samantha Ronson. Well, what was supposed to be a joke is actually just a drop in the dysfunctional, star-crossed lover bucket: LiLo has moved in right next door to Ronson.

TMZ has photos of the Venice, CA building Ronson lives in, which is directly next door to the one where Lindsay just set up house. Meanwhile, a source tells Us Magazine that Sam “was shaking her head and looking disgusted” during the move-in. “She kept saying, ‘I didn’t plan it this way.'” We can imagine—Lindsay is especially fragile right now, and there’s no relationship more delicate than that of exes. Generally speaking, it’s best to let time heal old wounds, especially if they include accusations of cheating, public Twitter fights, and even physical violence. It seems like the perfect storm of destruction, doesn’t it?

Take a look back at the (formerly?) estranged couple in the gallery below.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Watch This Cover Of Home And Seriously Consider Having Kids

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This father and little girl covering Home by Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros has it’s limitations. For example, you could not convert it to MP3 on listentoyoutube.com and then play it in your car while giving your friend a ride. Your friend would think you were creepy, stop accepting rides from you and report you to the police. And the police would ask, “What exactly are you accusing your friend of doing?” And your friend would say, “I’m not really sure, but he’s listening to little girls sing pop songs in his car.” And then the police would ask, “You mean like Kidz Bop?” And then your friend would say, “No, not a group of children. Specifically one little girl and her dad.” And then the police would say, “Oh,” and then arrest you.

But aside from those limitations, this is really great to watch and it will make you want to start a family. Gentlemen, buy some rings, and, ladies, get your cycles figured out. We’re about to build some babies.

Hahaha, that was great! But, seriously, we’ve made a huge mistake. We’ve got no business raising a child.

Thanks, The Daily What.

Partial Solar Eclipse Photos Are Impartially Awesome

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Here’s some photos from a partial solar eclipse in Dinslaken, Germany this morning. Check out how awesome it is while I try to come up with a reason to have posted them on a pop culture site:

Because we are sometimes a humoure site (that’s the humor way I spell it), I guess my job is to add jokes to this? Sure – solar eclipse walks into a bar, bartender’s like, “how the f*** is any of this happening?” and everyone else in the bar agrees. Joke complete. And my post title was like, 4% a joke. I should get a raise. “Now that’s a joke!” – my boss, who is also a joker.

Additional ridiculous eclipse pic after the jump:

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Vivica A. Fox, 46, Engaged To Club Promoter, 27

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Vivica A. Fox & Slim "Omar" White

Looks like Vivica A. Fox can still play that game. Page Six says the actress was a surprised with an 8-carat engagement ring by club promoter boyfriend Omar “Slim” White while vacationing in South Beach recently. Despite their nearly 20-year age difference, we think these two might have a chance. After all, they stuck together even after photos of Slim’s giant junk were leaked online last January by an angry ex. See photos of the couple in the gallery below.

[Photo: FilmMagic]

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