Gavin Rossdale Admits To Gay Fling With Pop Star, Though Really Who Hasn’t?

by (@hallekiefer)

marilynrossdalegetty

Man, can we go just one week without a faded rocker admitting to a fling with a cross-dressing gay British pop star? That what’s our fantasy celeb gossip blog would look like…and today it’s coming true! Despite denying a relationship in the past, Gavin Rossdale now admits to a gay fling with pop-star Marilyn, formerly known as Peter Robinson. When question about it in a new Details interview, Gwen Stefani’s better half says, “It’s not something I’ve talked about really because it’s always been in the glare of a tabloid world. It’s just one of those things: Move on. When you’re 17, Jesus Christ. I don’t think there’s anything strange about any form of–you’re learning about life. It’s a part of growing up. That’s it. No more, no less.” Good think Gavin’s career needs a boost so he is finally reading to talk about it…and for the tabloids to scream like a little girl over it!

When asked if it was a one-time fling, Rossdale claims, “That was it. You have to know what you like, and I know what I like.” Hmm…porcelain skin, long blond hair, devastating cheek bones…yup, he is definitely sure! [Photo: Getty]

World’s Fastest Mobility Scooter Has Been Invented, Because It Is Necessary

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No one is safe anymore. For THIS has been invented and will surely be put into mass production by early next year:

It’s the world’s fastest mobility scooter. UK Metro Reports:

Colin Furze, 31, spent nearly three months converting the machine which has a powerful 125cc motorbike engine hidden under the seat, five gears and twin exhausts.
The petrol-powered super scooter, which is British racing green, can almost reach the national speed limit and keep up with cars on the motorway.

First, side note, my new official favo(u)rite colo(u)r is “British racing green.” Moving along.

Why have a motorcycle or any other sort of machine actually built for speed when you can have this? Sorry, I don’t want to be a Negative Nancy. Hell, why NOT? Oh, this is why:

‘It is quite scary when I’m driving it fast as the frame is pretty flimsy and designed for going along at slow speeds,” said Colin, from Stamford, Lincs.
‘You can’t take your eyes off the road when driving it as any rash steering decisions could make it flip over and the slightest dip or bump in the road makes it drift off course.’

In addition to certain death, this will surely beget a whole new Fast and Furious franchise. Plus side, it will make the handicap and the old feel a ton more badass, until the aforementioned certain death. Also, I hope Mr. Furze keeps away from cliffs. Ugh, TOO SOON. I apologize.

Antoine Dodson Is Our Favorite Everything

by (@hallekiefer)


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If we had kids or a wife, the last thing we’d want to hide them from is Antoine Dodson at the BET Hip-Hop Awards last night (ugh, that joke was a stretch, even for us). Dodson appeared briefly in all of his red bandana’ed glory for a short “best of” version of the Bed Intruder song, which everyone has been loving/hating/incredibly offended by for weeks now. In case you’ve never heard or seen the famous meme (for example, you had been frozen in a glacier for thousands of years until earlier today) Dodson’s amazing televised rant at his sister’s unknown assailant was embraced by the Internet and turned into a beautiful song…an Autotuned song.

Michael Gregory of the Gregory Brothers, one member of the group who originally Autotuned the song played the keyboard, which was okay considering nobody cares about him at all. The point is, when Antoine walked on stage, that audience was so loud, you would have thought we were in the audience. Said Dodson,  “I don’t call people and say, ‘Hey, I want to be on your show.’ They reached out to me and said, ‘You are the hot topic right now, so we want you to be on the show.’” We are proud students of the Get That Money, Honey School Of Performance, so whether Dodson’s tune makes you want to play it at your wedding or throw away your computer and move to Canada, we applaud any accolades or cash he receives from his fans. Run and tell, run and tell, run and tell that!

Human Peanut Becomes World’s Shortest Man

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Oh, look what we’ve found: A live action version of “Marcel the Shell with Shoes On”! That’s because a new 18-year-old human baby in Nepal has been tinily crowned — one ripped off of a tooth molar, we’re sure — the World’s Smallest Adult Man.

And you guys…

HE IS SO SMALL!!!!!

His name is Khagendra Thapa Magar, and on his 18th birthday, he became an official Guinness Record Holder at only 27 inches tall.

Here is video of this treasure which will cause your heart to dive out of your eyes and into the pool of tears that has now formed around you. From the opening shot of him failing at badminton (he is the very same size as the shuttlecock… ladies…), to the footage of his mother combing his hair with a toothbrush, to his voice that sounds like he sucked helium out of a sealed contact lens… there is just so much to love about him.

Antoine Dodson Performs At BET Awards And WHAT IS GOING ON???

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Antoine Dodson was in a viral video, got real internet famous, then was in an awesome autotuned remix of that viral video and got real internet famous again, and then he started showing up in person to things and now he’s performing the autotuned version of the viral video he was in live on awards shows and videos of the live performance are on the internet and going viral and AHHHHHHHHH WHAT IS HAPPENING ANY MORE???? WHICH ONE IS REAL AND WHICH ONE IS THE DREAM????? I NEED AN INCEPTION TOP DOT COM!!!!!

Did BWE Predict Mario Lopez’s Reality Show “Saved By The Baby”?

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No one in the world is happier than myself about the upcoming Vh1 reality show following around Saved By The Bell star cum journalist Mario Lopez, his girlfriend, dancer Courtney Mazzo, and his new baby, probably a giant dimple. Look how happy they are:

The show, which premieres Monday, November 1 at 10:30/9:30c on VH1, follows Mario Lopez around in a brand new light that we’re not used to seeing: Hot dad. Everything about the show sounds absolutely fantastic! Except for one thing: The title. That’s because the title is Saved by the Baby. Adorable, right? Yes. But coincidence? I spent 11 hours making the following Photoshop for my Mad Men recap back on August 17, 2010. Witness:

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Watch: Mark-Paul Gosselaar Sex Scene In Weeds Is NSFW and AWESOME

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First thing’s first, I’d just like to repeat that this is NSFW, as you can probably ascertain from this screen grab. And the fact that the phrase “sex scene” is in the headline. A sex scene that I have watched five times already. And counting. This isn’t your mom’s non-pop-culture-relevant sex scene (what?). This is a Mark-Paul Gosselaar sex scene. And, for whatever reason, Saved By The Bell references hold fast and strong and dear in my heart, as I know they do in so many of yours as well.

Well, you know what? Let’s call a spade a spade and say that this would not be the case if this were a Dustin Diamond or Lark Voorhies sex scene. My Saved By The Bell loyalties only go so far. Specifically, as far as this scene. Show Girls? Not my cup ‘o tea. Not even ironically. So, basically, what I’m trying to say is screw Saved By The Bell, it’s just a red herring to say that Mark-Paul is HOT. So HOT. And so is Mary Louise. And I’m overcome with feelings of jealousy and awesomeness. Anyway. Let’s watch it. I’ll watch it with you, again. Dad, if you’re reading, don’t watch this. Thanks.

I mean, True Blood features scenes like this in the outtakes for its commercials. (That was supposed to mean that True Blood basically consists of these scenes and adds dialogue and plot as an afterthought plus fangs and stuff). My point with this is WOW look at that sexy chemistry and WHAT is the context wait I DON’T CARE because this is CRAZY bar sex featuring one of the premiere teen idols of my time. AWESOME.

Via Fleshbot (site NSFW)

Courteney Cox Arquette Offered $1 Million To Be Official Queen Of The Cougars

by (@hallekiefer)

The ink has barely dried on David Arquette’s thousands of apology letters and already the cougar community is roaring to claim wife Courteney as their queen. Following the news of their separation, Courteney Cox Arquette was offered a $1 million contract to represent CougarLife.com, a dating site for older lady “cougars” looking for younger male “cubs” and oh god, is that Aunt Karen on here?! Considering the couple is not technically divorced yet, we doubt Courteney will go for it. And guys, didn’t she just say she didn’t want to be anybody’s mother? We know this isn’t exactly the same, but we’re sure Freud would say we’re close.

The contract, should she sign it, would require Courteney to voice 12 radio ads, appear in 4 TV ads, and make at least 30 public appearance over the course of the year. Dang, that’s a lot of work! We though cougaring was all about squeezing into leopard skin dresses and chugging mai tais. Who knew? We say go for it, Courteney. The worst that could happen is that you’ll make a million dollars. Besides that, you’ll be helping people like your friend whose name rhymes with Shmennifer Shmaniston find hot young studs to be dumped by.

What It’s Like to Meet Michael Lohan

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As some of you know, almost a month ago exactly I packed up my many trinkets and tunics, slapped my New York City super in the face, and bought a one way ticket to Los Angeles, where I am now residing. This move was not prompted so much by the fact that I had spent the 12 best years of my life living in a cement hole, moreso because I had landed a real life television job. That’s right, I am now the co-host of The Gossip Queens, a nightly gab fest airing on Logo at 7 PM and all throughout the day. Here is an unflattering photo of me on the set!

That’s me, far right, saying something hilarious I’m sure, Alec Mapa, in the tie, Bernadette Pauley, lefter, and Loni Love, leftist. We are all comedians, and while we’re also talking gossip with various bloggers and guests, we’re mainly being funny. Which is why you should watch. 7 PM. Logo. Watch.

But while we do consider ourselves a comedy show, next week, things will take a turn for the serious. Because we managed to score an interview with Michael Lohan. Now, some of you might recognize his name as one of the great recent purveyors of Celebrity Boxing. But, more famously maybe, he also happens to be the father of Lindsay Lohan, currently serving time in a rehab facility because girl loves drugs. Also, and maybe most importantly, he is the BFF of Jon Gosselin.

I was nervous. Which tunic would I wear for such an occasion? The black one was nice… oh but this black one is really nice.

Michael arrived at our set dressed like a man on a mission. A daughter saving mission. His feet donned the finest of ostrich-skinned cowboy boots. No doubt that ostrich was asking for it. His jacket was made of a leather so fine, so buttery soft, that even Hitler would have questioned its provenance. This jacket was what Hollywood dreams were made of, and if I were Lindsay, I would contact my dad just to feel the lugz-zhurious sleeve alone.

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Kristen Stewart Says “Anal” In New Clip, But We’re Too Busy Watching Her Act To Care

by (@katespencer)

We’re seeing Welcome to the Rileys tomorrow and while we’re loving this clip of Kristen Stewart (photos) as Mallory, casually dropping words like “anal” and “p*ssy,” we’re genuinely curious and excited about what awaits us in the indie flick. Sure, some might find it shocking that the same girl who plays a virginal vamp-lover is rocking stripper heels and making jokes about nailing German Shepherds in this Jake Scott-directed flick, but die-hard KStew fans know the actress is all about pushing herself out of her comfort zone with every role she hooks under her belt.

WTTR looks no different, and  it might be Kristen’s riskiest part to date. What’s more, she shot it in the Fall of 2008, right after she spent months tripping over things as Bella Swan in Twilight. After seeing WTTR, Roger Ebert called Kristen “an important new actress,” while USA Today gushed, “For an actress like Stewart, it would be easy to play it safe. Knock out a romantic comedy or a Nicholas Sparks weepie while the vampire cash keeps rolling in from Twilight sequels. Instead, Stewart is challenging herself, and moviegoers, too.”

Our point? Kristen’s got chops. She can go from biting her lip in the biggest franchise movie in the world to convincingly portraying a somber teen stripper in an indie flick, all within a blink of her (to die for) eyes. She doesn’t take the easy road, instead she prefers the road less traveled by her limelight-loving peers. Say what you will about Twilight, her personal life, her refusal to flirt with the paparazzi like Paris Hilton – but don’t tell us this girl can’t act.

Welcome to the Rileys opens on October 29th; which is when you’ll find our full review of the movie here on theFABlife.