Are you watching this clip, Dreamworks? Here’s your next movie, already in the can. In fact, just take the audio track from Racing Stripes and lay it over this video then loop it so it’s 75 minutes, toss in a flamboyant seahorse in a pink wig singing “Just Dance”, add 8 seconds of 3-D and viola! The movie Momo:
Oh my god. Suddenly it all makes sense. We take it all back. The blow-up doll comments, the beach ball boobs slams and thatÃ‚Â time we laughed when her face fell off. It turns out, Heidi Montag did it all for love. At least that’s what her doctor’s “close friend” is blabbing to Radar Online. According to the site, Heidi had a hopeless crush on her late plastic surgeon Frank Ryan, who died in a car accident this August. The revelation comes just days after the former Hills star accused Dr. Ryan of misleading her into getting ten surgeries in one day. Maybe all she wanted was one magical day with Dr. Ryan….*swoon*
“I believe she had a crush on him,” Dr. Ryan’s friend Dawn DaLuise said in an interview to Radar.Ã‚Â “I believe she was romantically obsessed with him… she saw him as a night in shining armor.” DaLuise also challenges Heidi’s claim that Dr. Ryan wanted her to be his personal Barbie Doll. According to her, it was the other way around.Ã‚Â “He sent texts and emails to friends saying that she wanted to be a Barbie, she wanted to look exactly like a Barbie. He presented why he didn’t think it was a good idea.”
This raises the age old question: did she love him because of his plastic surgery skills, or did she get plastic surgery because she loved him? Or is this all crap? It’s probably that last one. But let’s pretend it’s not. Suddenly Heidi’s terrifying body transformation seems like a charming romantic comedy come to life! Sort of.
It’s a classic: Heidi was too shy (and too married) to ask him out, so she kept making other excuses to see him. A boob job here, a tummy tuck there. He won’t suspect anything. But after the anesthesia knocked her out, Heidi’s dreams were filled with visions of Dr. Frank.Ã‚Â Maybe that whole divorce with Spencer was real after all, and she was going to leave him for Dr. Ryan. Didn’t they reunite right after the doctor’s untimely death?
We have done it. We have cracked The Speidi Code. Or maybe there’s a simpler answer.
Eat Pray Love
When ordinary people do strange things for no reason, it’s a David Lynch movie. When Julia Roberts does strange things for no reason, it’s Eat Pray Love. In this travelogue/rom-com, she walks out on both handsome Billy Crudup and sexy James Franco to go through the title’s three steps. It’s a journey that takes her across the parts of Italy, India and Bali most often seen in postcards. Some viewers may wonder what happened to reality—especially when her lithe Swedish companion complains about carrying a non-existent “muffin top.” Most, however, will swoon at the gorgeous locations and Roberts’s affecting way of swallowing her emotions. For those looking for pure escapist fare, it’s a satisfying feast. The guys who watch with them will thank Shiva for both Richard Jenkins and Javier Bardem, who contribute fine supporting turns as the men trying to thaw Roberts’s sphinx-like cool. Viewers seeking for a bit more testosterone this Thanksgiving may enjoy The Winning Season, a smart comedy starring Sam Rockwell as a drunkard coaching a girls’ varsity basketball team. Rockwell is terrific as a soak truly in love with hoops, but mystified by anything in a skirt—including star player Emma Roberts (Julia’s niece). The action skillfully evades cliché to wrap up in an unexpected comic finale. Right down to the final buzzer and without shameless cheerleading, The Winning Season proves itself to be a great movie about both sports and girls.
Extras: EPL contains an extended cut and commentary from director/Glee creator Ryan Murphy.
- By C. Bottomley
Check out the DVD bonus clip above!
Guess who got her license back? Following almost four years of consistent DUI arrests and probation violations, The Betty Ford Clinic and the LA Country Probation Dept. agree that Lindsay Lohan is ready to drive again. Both parties claim the Mean Girls star isn’t receiving preferential treatment, which makes us kind of scared about how many recidivist drunk drivers are zooming around California. Can’t they wait until she’s actually finished her 90-day rehab stint?
Well, apparently they did, as LiLo was freed from the clinic only three weeks into her planned stay. Three months of rehab, three weeks of rehab…what’s the difference, really? Word is she went straight to the DMV, picked up her license, and immediately rented a car. To be fair, she might need it for her outpatient work: she’ll be enjoying near-daily sessions of therapy and counseling, as well as two drug tests a week, in exchange for freedom. Still, shouldn’t they have warned other drivers first?
[Photo: Getty Images]
Happy 18th birthday, Miley Cyrus!! It is insane to us that you are ONLY 18, it feel like we’ve been talking about you for years and years. You already have millions of dollars, a zen house of your own, legs we’d kill for and pretty soon you’re going to star in a movie where you’re going to play a private investigator. We’d say that you’re wise beyond your years. And yet only now can you vote and you’re no longer considered jailbait (sorry, pervs).
Miley celebrated her birthday this past weekend with a private party at the L.A. hotspot Trousdale, where someone made a lovely pencil rendering of her face, specially enhanced to include Lisa Rinna‘s old lips. It’s nice to see that even when you’re a teenage bajillionaire, your friends aren’t above making you homemade cards. For a retrospective of Miley photo ops, check out our gallery of the teen queen starting with some achy breaky baby pics. Happy birthday, girl!
[Photo: Splash News Online]
This is what you get when you look cross all the time. This is what you get when you look like an underage stripper who forgot to wipe off her make-up for two years running. Eventually, your attitude problem is going to piss off a lot of people, including the one’s who sign your checks.
Taylor Momsen has been a blink-and-you-miss-her presence on Gossip Girl lately. Well, that’s been upgraded to no screen time at all, as sources reveal that Momsen’s character, Jenny, will be absent from at least four episodes in December. Rumors are rife that the decision has been made because of her being full of sunshine at all times (erm, we’re being sarcastic). Cue Tim Gunn calling her a “diva” and a “brat.”Ã‚Â Other series insiders insist it’s for creative reasons, but that sounds like a load of BS to us.
Whoops! Guess the celebrity who just made an ass of themselves? That too, in broad daylight, and not falling out of a club at some insane hour.
It’s Paris Hilton! Girlfriend was shopping in Beverly Hills and, the story is, she dropped her bunny. This isn’t code for anything. She actually dropped a bunny stuffed toy and bent down to pick it up. And she clearly misjudged the length of her tunic, by the looks of this picture. Also a fitting description as Paris tends to misjudge a lot of situations. This is one of the funnier situations so we just had to celebrate it the one way we know how… a gallery. Do join us below. [Photo: Splash News Online]
Things just keep getting messier for Fantasia Barrino.Ã‚Â Her affair with the marriedÃ‚Â Antwaun Cook has dragged her into his divorce proceedings, with his wife Paula branding Fantasia as a home wrecker. Fantasia maintains that she thought Antwaun was separated at the time of their 11-month on-and-off affair, but Paula, allegedly, wants to sue herÃ‚Â for Ã¢â‚¬Å“alienation of affection and criminal conversationÃ¢â‚¬Â.
Another element of Fantasia’s struggle was revealed in court. Fantasia spoke of getting an abortion around the time of her suicide attempt while questioned by Paula’s lawyers. Not that this admission has helped sooth Paula in any way at all. A source reveals, “PaulaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s lawyer is arguing that they got the room because she knew he was still married.Ã‚Â Paula is not doing too well, having to hear all this in court and replay it all over, sheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s emotionally torn.”
We’ll have to wait and see what comes out of this. But we’re really feeling for Fantasia for going through what she did.
Was that $17,000 date with Adrien Brody worth it? Because following the random spending spree,Ã‚Â Courtney Love is being sued by Jacob & Co, the blingiest jewelers to celebrities in New York. Courtney needs to stop throwing that cash around because the collectors are riding in on their piggy banks. Jacob & Co claim that the singer owes them close to $114,000 worth of borrowed jewelry.Ã‚Â If we were Courtney, we would have hidden under a big rock—possibly the diamonds she was loaned—instead of flaggin down Brody. George Clooney, we’d understand. He’s worth going to jail for.
The jewelry in question includes two white gold and diamond chains, a white gold, floral-design mesh bracelet and a pair of white gold and diamond pave hoop earring. So far, the jewelers allege that only the bracelets came back. And here’s the kicker: it has supposedly been explained that Love lost everything else. We totally understand because we lose thousands of dollars worth of loot every day. Courtney’s bad is that she agreed to be responsible for all the pieces “regardless of loss or damage.”
And that was her undoing. Courtney responsible for anything? Bad idea.
There was a time not so long ago when I was convinced that Anne Hathaway was the WORST. Sure, her willingness to get naked at the drop of a hat has always been a reason not to entirely write her off, but all the while she was dating that shady hedge fund con man dude there was something totally off-putting emanating from her. (Plus, I saw her on the red carpet at the MTV Movie Awards a few years back and she was kind of acting like a huge you-know-what). It wasn’t until she hosted SNL for the first time two years ago that I actually realized that she had a personality, good comedic timing and some pipes to boot.
So, natch, it was with great anticipation that I watched this weekend’s episode. Based on the hilarious previews, I figured that the show would be pretty good, but I had no idea that it would turn out as well as it did. During her two appearances on the show, Hathaway has, dare I say, established herself as the best young female host* that has graced the stage of Studio 8H in some time. Her Katie Holmes impression ALONE earned her the right to come back and host again; hope you were taking notes, Emma Stone. Additionally, she showed off her impressive vocal prowess with a knock ‘em down take on “Over The Rainbow,” and her work as a stressed (and meth’d?) housewive in the MegaMart Black Friday sketch was perfectly manic. Hey Lorne, think there’s any chance we can have Hathaway back to host again this season?
So, we’re all agreed that Hathaway rules, but what about the rest of the cast? Follow along for our weekly look at who’s in and out of
Dr. Evil Lorne’s doghouse, Bwe.tv’s SNL Power Rankings.