Fellaaaaaaahz! Ever gone out with your lady, and wished she would magically grow a foot and expose her spinal column to you? Well now you can toss that tiny beeznatch to the side, because you — yes, YOU! — are about to find out what it takes to ask out a supermodel. Take a look at the brave David Jr., who went directly to the coked-up source to get the goods. David’s chances of getting a model to date him are pretty great, as they can definitely smell the Big Mac in his beard.
Pardon my BWE.tv inside-jokey titling of the post, but this trailer for Christopher Guest’s latest improvised hilarityfest really does look pretty awesome. And if that’s not enough to quench your thirst for funny, the movie’s MySpace page has an additional clip.
So you waste your days reading the latest tabloid tripe on blogs like this one, but you occasionally wish there were a somehow productive application for all the inane celebrity knowledge you’ve accidentally acquired. Well kids, today is your lucky day because AOL has an (admittedly addictive) new online game called Gold Rush in which you can use your useless knowledge of pop culture trivia to win real money, like even a million dollars. Also you can access insanely surreal footage of an Arguette wearing drag whilst trying to “name that Baldwin”, which we’ve heard will be succeeded by Stephen Baldwin (probably wearing a WWJD bracelet) trying to “identify that Arquette”. Win lose or draw, that shit should be framed and hanging in the MoMA.
Today Cityrag points us over to this pretty funny yet ultimately disturbing Photoshop Contest over at Worth1000. It’s called Fasting Time, and it shows us what certain celebrities would look like if they were skeletal. Sorry– if they were more skeletal.
Speaking of contests, Congratulations to Eddie Tweed for winning our BWE Billy Bob’s Board For Scoundrels Photoshop Contest. Your $1 million check* is in the mail.
*or BWE T-shirt
Last night’s episode of The Office was ground-breaking. It proved that the writers, along with Steve Carell, have finally created the quintessential douchiest (and somehow likeable) character on television past and present. And it all happened when these four words were uttered: “Hug It Out, Bitch.” The famous line uttered by Ari Gold on Entourage, the line that has defined douchey men for the past two years now. Round of applause for the attention to Massengil detail, writers.
Three episodes into season three, the storylines are blossoming. Jim has a new love interest in Scranton, Karen (played by the daughter of Quincy Jones and Peggy Lipton, Rashida), who is kind of like a Pam 3000 — sophisticated, sexy but not without a sense of humor. Is JAM not meant to be? And Dwight and Michael had their first real breakdown of power last night. Their Peanut M&M showdown made us crave chocolate and conflict and dental insurance.
And, our usual reminder, peruse the generous deleted scenes on NBC.com. Thoughts on the episode or the season as a whole? Funny, Bad, or Building?
When somebody calls your son “the devil”, how do you respond? Well, if you’re former President George H.W. Bush, you go on Larry King Live and call him an “ass”. Oh snap! I’d be careful though, guys. Men have fought wars for less. Much… much less.
If there’s one thing douchebag Republican Congressman pedophile Mark Foley has taught us, it’s the importance of having the correct information, lest an innocent person (or an entire political party) have their reputation soiled by a scandal in which they actually played no part. So to clarify this confusing realm of politicians turned cybersex offenders, we’ve created the fun new game: Get Your Foleys Straight!
Christian Finnegan’s blog is a must-read. This week, during the height of the Mark Foley
controversy prank-gone-awry, he was able to put everything in perspective, reminding us that Mr. Foley’s actions aren’t all that bad when compared to the actions of other current House members.
CURRENT HOUSE MEMBERS WITH SKELETONS MORE DISTURBING THAN MARK FOLEY’S
REP. KEN CALVERT (CA, 44th Dist.): Recently caught masturbating at the Vietnam Memorial.
REP. LANE EVANS (IL, 17th Dist.): Plays online Scrabble with Ayman Al-Zawahiri.
REP. VERNON J. EHLERS (MI, 3rd Dist.): In 1987, had one-nighter with Terri Schiavo. Never called.
To read the rest of the entry, click here.
- Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie wanted to watch each other grunt, sweat and workout at the Sports Club L.A. by themselves, but the gym refused to shut down to the public. That’s right — flex and moan where we can see ya, ya selfish bastards.
- Whale Rider‘s Keisha Castle-Hughes, 16, has officially become the first Oscar nominee to also be a teen parent. Let’s hope she can still Ebay off the swag to buy diapers.
- Eva Longoria rues the day she joined the Desperate Housewives cast, as the show’s title is nicely fitting in to her current love life, or so says every gossip headline on earth.
- Anthony Michael Hall has a mini nervous breakdown when he discovers that one kind-hearted paparazzi actually remembers who he is.
- William Shatner is slated to host a new ABC game show called Show Me the Money. And somewhere, Cuba Gooding Jr. opens his mouth to scream, but no sound comes out.
It’s Best Night Ever for Thursday, October 5th! Lang is here to walk you through the best of Thursday night tv, including Ugly Betty, The Office and Grey’s Anatomy!