Lord of the Suburbs

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theshire.jpgPop Candy points us to a housing development in Bend, Oregon called The Shire, whose name and concept were taken from the famous Hobbit dwelling-place in Lord of the Rings. Who needs stucco and vinyl siding when you can live in a “Swordsman” townhome next door to Merry Brandybuck and Gandalf the Wizard? Just be careful about getting too close to the home of conspicuously same-sex roommates Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee – ever since they got home from their “big adventure”, there have been several reports of strange late-night sounds coming from their hobbit-hole. Apparently their “fellowship” is still very strong.

It’s Official: Men Are Smarter Than Women (Deal With It)

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ron burgandy.jpgI’m a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That’s what kind of man I am. You’re just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of us. It’s science.

When Ron Burgundy shouted out those lines in Anchorman, you probably laughed, didn’t you? Well, according to a new study conducted by a British researcher, Ron… was right.

A controversial new study has claimed that men really are more intelligent than women. The study – carried out by a man – concluded that men’s IQs are almost four points higher than women’s.

What do you think about this; could it be true? Are men really smarter than women? Could K-Fed, Steve-O and Jason from Laguna Beach really be smarter than Paris, Jessica and Heidi from The Hills? Apparently the answer is yes. And we couldn’t be more terrified.

While You Were Contemplating Retirement

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  • Britney Spears and K-Fed are rumored to have named their new baby Sutton Pierce Federline. They’re really holding on tight to those SPF initials, aren’t they?
  • Jay-Z is coming out of retirement to release a new CD. The CD will be titled “I’m Retiring Again… Now!”, and will be topical and timely until his inevitable return in 2009.
  • Jennifer Aniston has topped People magazine’s annual Best Dressed list. However, just to knock her down a few pegs, they named Angelina Jolie “Best Undressed”.
  • Paris Hilton is all set to hit up Oktoberfest in Germany. She’s looking forward to the opportunity to drink a lot and act stupid for a change… in Germany.
  • Lifelong Yankees fan Jack Nicholson refused to wear a Red Sox cap in his new film. No joke here; we just included this to remind you that Jack Nicholson is the f**king man.

…Of The Day

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  • MAKING HER POINT: Paris Hilton proved stars really are blind (and not very picky) by making out with Travis Barker. (Egotastic)
  • MURDERER: CNN’s Nancy Grace straight up killed a bitch. Well, okay, maybe not “straight up”… but kinda/sorta. (Breitbart)
  • HITTING THE NAIL ON THE HEAD: Here’s a list of five comedians who have lost it. And yes, don’t worry, Eddie Murphy is included. (Cracked)
  • SAVE THE DATE: If you’re a freshman in college, you need this list of the important dates to remember. Make sure you commit these to memory… especially November 10th. (Collegehumor)
  • CELEBRITY TRANSLATOR: The Daily Show teaches us how Bush’s speeches would be so much more enjoyable if Little Richard was there. We couldn’t agree more. (YouTube)

Spring Fashion Trend! FUPAs.

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Check out “Ghetto Superstar” Mya at the Heatherette fashion show, modeling what’s sure to be a hot hot hot look for Spring 2007: FUPAs. Nothing like an Urkel-high waist, button-by-the-vag and a bad angle to make even the slimmest of celebrities look like your Mom waiting to pick you up from flute practice circa 1991.

LISTEN UP: Go Kentucky, It’s Your B’Day

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  • It’s B’Day over at My Old Kentucky Blog with a new Beyonce track, a couple indie rock Beyonce covers and a whole bunch of other assorted Beyonceness.
  • For the latest in their “one EP a month” project, Bishop Allen released a 14-song live performance from Cambridge, MA – 3 of the songs are available on their home page.
  • The Rawking Refuses to Stop has live tracks from The Silver Jews. Just don’t tell Mel!
  • Stereogum is spreading the word about a forthcoming album of Four Tet re-mixes for songs by artists such as Radiohead, Bloc Party and Sia.
  • Gorilla vs Bear wants you to hear the smart & sexy sounds of the Hot IQs.

MEREDITH-ATHON: Willard and Shalit’s Wacky Welcome!

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Since we’re all so obsessed with Meredith Vieira’s first day on Today, which is today, we would remiss you let you miss this priceless little piece of TV, in which winged monkey Willard Scott and moustached munchkin Gene Shalit (who I could just stare at all f*cking day long) welcome Vieira to the show by awkwardly dragging this unwilling Dorothy down their “yellow brick road” (whose destination I really don’t want to know. Check it out!

ICYMI: Justin’s Animalsex/Lovesounds

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Yesterday’s TRL featured a rather interesting segment in which Justin Timberlake, on the show to promote his new album futuresex/lovesounds, is played a series of animal mating noises and forced to identify each sexin’ species. What would have been really awesome is if some prankster backstage would have suddenly cued up audio of Cameron Diaz moaning. Anyway, the fun starts around 1:45 in the clip below. (via The Jane Blog)

SIZZLER: Splitney Houston– Bobby’s Out, Whitney Needs New Drug Buddy

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bobbybrown.JPGAfter 14 years of marital bliss, Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown have called it quits. Over the course of their union the couple had one daughter, Bobbi Kristina, and countless dealers.

The question now is, who will they rebound with? In Bobby’s case, it’s rumored that he’s wasted no time and has already moved in with Karrine “Superhead” Steffans. Whitney plans on weighing her options before jumping into anything serious. However, if she can’t find anybody decent, she’s got one hell of a last-resort waiting for her.