CAPTION THIS! McCartney Looks for Love

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Looks like Paul McCartney is lettin’ the ladies know what they’re missing out on… 5 inches of multi-billion dollar lovin’.

Can you do better? (That shouldn’t be hard… hey-o!) Leave your caption after the jump!

Breaking! New Project Runway Scandal!

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JEFFSEBELIA.JPGJust when we thought our Project Runway withdrawal couldn’t sink any deeper, a bit of news comes through to feed the addiction. New York Magazine reveals today that yet another PR contestant has been accussed of cheating: Jeffrey Sebelia, the weak-chinned ex-drug addict with the torah scroll tattooed around his neck. Apparently, when the devastatingly charming Tim Gunn visited Jeffrey’s home in Los Angeles to check on his collection, he noted that Sebalia had a lot of work left to do. Somehow, word got back to Xylophone-Chested Nancy‘s (i.e. Laura’s) Mom. When the big runway show went down only a few weeks later, Laura noticed how complete and finely made all of Jeffrey’s clothing was — unusual for a guy whose clothes usually looked like the went through a shredder, and moreso considering how little time he had to finish everything. Hence, Laura accussed Jeffrey of using outside sewers to help him complete the project, something against PR’s strict rules.

Bravo TV execs remain quiet over the turn-out of this serious accusation, and hopefully it will be included in what sounds like one of the most dramatic PR finales yet. We wonder, though, if this means that both Jeffrey and Laura are in the final 3? Or, according to the rumor, will there actually be 4 real runway shows this year, minus the decoy? Check out Jeffrey’s collection for yourself… do you think the guy cheated?

YOUTUBULAR: Phil Collins vs. The Ultimate Warrior

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What I Learned Today: Apparently in 1990 Phil Collins shot a mockumentary titled At Last… The Long Lost Network TV Special while on tour*. A bizarre collection of stars including John Travolta, John Candy, and Weird Al made appearances in the film, portraying TV execs hellbent on pitching Mr. Collins their ideas for a network special. Um… yeah. This clip, starring Gilbert Gottfried, Vanessa Williams and the one and only Ultimate Warrior, is the reason YouTube was invented. Enjoy.

*This post brought to you by The More You Wish You Didn’t Know.

SIZZLER: Lohan’s Dad Finds Pen, Paper & God

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Lindsay Lohan hasn’t spoken to father Michael Lohan since his prison sentence for drink driving and battery last year. And according to Pappy MiLo himself, all efforts to get in touch with his lil’ ginger one are being rebuked by self-air-quoted
“people” (read Mother Dina Lohan.) So in a last ditch attempt to contact his daughter, Michael, who recently found God, penned a long and heartfelt letter to his daughter and immediately sent it to British tabloid The Sun. After the jump, read his letter in full, along with our helpful Celebrity Translation.

Read more…

LISTEN UP: “Phat” Albert

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  • ProductShopNYC has a track from Albert Hammond Jr.’s first solo project and, surprisingly enough, it’s not as “strokey” as you might think.
  • Scotty Stereogum has a new track from Swan Lake, the Damn Yankees of Indie Rock Supergroups.
  • The kids over at Idolator must’ve spent their weekend getting high and chasing rainbows, because the first thing they lay on us this morning is three new tracks from the “Freak-Folk” hippies known as The Skygreen Leopards.
  • MOKB continues his public service, this time gathering a ton of covers of The Beatles‘ “Yesterday”, with versions ranging the entire musical spectrum from Bob Dylan to Boyz II Men to Jose Feliciano.
  • Said the Gramophone has new tracks from Okay and Yo La Tengo. Go listen to them or I will beat your ass.

CAPTION THIS: Gay Guevara

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When you’re onstage performing 3rd rate emo anthems for a crowd of tens of adoring adolescent fans, dressed like a member of the Ku Klux Klan, you might be taking your hate-fueled crusade against blogging a little too far. You say Leto, I say Catalano, but one thing is certain – the revolution will not be blogged about.

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Seriously kids, read blogs or end up looking like this:

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(pics via MollyGood)

GAMES: Happy Jew Year, Mel Gibson!

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In honor of the Jewish New Year this past weekend, this week’s game is So You Think You Can Drive, Mel Gibson? Try your best to pick up as many tequila bottles as possible while also avoiding state troopers and those pesky Flying Stars O’David. Sorry, fellas — no flying sugartits in this version… but feel free to bat around some caramel-filled balloons in your cubicle for the ultimate Mel Gibson experience.

Even Jodie Foster Used To Be Fun

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jodie.jpgCityrag stumbled upon this gallery of old candid celebrity photographs on Flickr and reminded us of something we had completely forgotten about: old famous people people used to be fun! Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster weren’t always crazy, anti-semetic and boring as all hell. They were like Zach Braff, Colin Farrell and Lindsay Lohan… but talented! What a world!

So that begs the question: which current actor or actress is going to grow up and become a restrained, boring Jodie Foster-of-a-celebrity? Jessica Simpson? Paris? Steve-O? Whoever it is, it’s probably going to surprise us. What’s your guess? (For the record, I’m going with Hilary Duff. Just a hunch.)

Prosthetic Limbs: So Hop Right Now

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AMAZRACEDOLPH.JPGWe here at BWE are noticing an interesting trend: prosthetic limbs. Move over slowly Heather Mills, technology and reality are making prosthetic limbs a hot new accessory. Take The Amazing Race this season, which features a three-legged team: Peter and poor incredibly-strong Sarah. Sarah’s been a real trooper (she’s a motivational speaker, p.s.), hoofing it across continents with a futuristic prosthetic limb that’s lightning fast! Well, when it isn’t leaking hydraulic fluid… and when her boyfriend/weird aggressive dad figure isn’t talking to her like she’s a mentally ill fifth grader… But other than that, that leg is a benefit! Especially when she shows it off to a group of Mongolians by performing a shuttle run and dancing the Roger Rabbit for some pocket change. (The good news it, judging by her upper-bod, Sarah could tear Peter to shreds, which we hope happens in an upcoming epi. We really can’t stand his attitude towards her.)

Today, we learned that an adorable baby dolphin named Winter who lost her tail in an unfortunate human-related accident might be getting a prosthetic tail instead! Ayayay! Poor lil’ Winter will need three different prosthetic tails as she gets bigger, kind of like dolphin training wheels. And while the cost of said tails will exceed $100,000, here’s an idea: why doesn’t a company sponsor the tail? You know, like a racecar? I’d be happy to go out and buy a pool-load of Tide if I knew little Winter’s life depended on it.