The Office: Domo Arigato, Mr. Scotto

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STEVE CARELL.JPGThe best Christmas gift NBC could bestow upon the masses? An hour-long Christmas episode of The Office, of course. Last night, the show kicked off to a depressing start when Michael’s girlfriend Carol broke-up with him over some admittedly creepy photoshopped Christmas cards. There’s nothing worse than a broken-hearted Michael… actually, there IS: 30-seconds of James Blunt‘s “Goodby My Lover,” Michael’s break-up song of choice (the song douchily trumped later on with his karaoke pic, “Your Body is a Wonderland.”) Andy, Jim and Dwight accompany Michael to Benihana to soften the blow (“Bros Before Hos”), where they meet two Asian waitresses who eventually accompany the fellas back to the office. And if marking an Asian girl’s arm to tell them apart isn’t more offensive than all that “ching-chong” Rosie O’Donnell business, well than slap a rice paddy hat on our heads and get your pants dry-cleaned: That was pretty bad!

Moving along, we see the relationship blossom between Kelly and Ryan (Ed. Note: We’d like to add that we saw Mindy Kaling in NYC last weekend, and she really is every bit as adorable as she is on the show. ) We enjoyed the new frienly Karen-Pam-Dynam, and if judging from the rebound talk Jim had with Michael, you can officially set your “JAM Reunion Countdown Clocks” today. Also, is it supes-pathetskies that when Oscar walked back into the office, we shouted “Yay Oscar!” while laying in bed, alone, and sick? Don’t answer that in the comments.

What you CAN tell us, however, is what you thought of the episode: How did it stack up to possibly our fave ep ever, “Yaaaaaankee Swap”? NBC has its first deleted scene up (warning: it’s really awkward), and will post more later in the week. Also, do you guys think Jan is going with Michael to Jamaica?

Will The Barry Gibb Talk Show Be on SNL Tomorrow?

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TMZ is reporting that one of our favorite SNL sketches, The Barry Gibb Talk Show, will be returning tomorrow night when Justin Timberlake returns to the show as its host and musical guest. The sketch features Justin and now ex-SNLer Jimmy Fallon as two of the Bee Gees, speaking like two little Australian lambs while trying to conduct “serious” conversations about world events. If this rumor is true, Fallon would surely appear in a cameo appearance, and we hope hope hope it is. Nothing like Justy-Timbs trying not to laugh to put a lil’ Xmas fire into our loins.

If you haven’t seen the genius of this sketch, Happy Hanukkah:

Die Hard 4: Die Hardererest

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The first teaser trailer for Live Free or Die Hard found its way onto the world wide web yesterday, and man, does it look great. Granted Bruce Willis is roughly 93-years-old now, but for some reason I think I can buy an old-ass John McClane killing hundreds of terrorists before I can buy Rocky Balboa going 2 rounds with a young heavyweight.

So what’d you think; pretty cool, right? Judging by the appearance of the Apple guy, I’m gonna predict right now that the PC Guy is behind the whole thing. Spoiler Alert.

Elisha Cuthbert: Your Vagina Is On Notice

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paris elisha.jpgFirst, she ruined America’s sweetheart. Now, she’s about to ruin The Girl Next Door. Paris Hllton must be stopped.

With her short-but-sweet (if you’re a fan of crotch shots) Britney Spears friendship already dunzo, Paris has moved on and found another young, attractive Hollywood starlet to destroy: this time it’s her House of Wax co-star Elisha Cuthbert.

We’re worried about what kind of trouble these two blondes will get themselves into. Anybody who’s ever seen 24 knows that Elisha is bad news– trouble finds this girl like STD’s find Paris. By combining forces with Ms. Hilton, a few upskirt paparazzi pictures may be the least of her concerns. Elisha and Paris meeting up and going to Hyde together might set off a chain of events that brings this country down to its knees in a matter of hours. In fact, there’s your plot line for season 6.

We need you Jack Bauer. Let’s see if you can save us from this.

[You can see more pics of the lethal twosome at Egotastic]

AD WIZARDS: Miller Is All About Peeling Out

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Europeans make better beer and better beer commercials, as evidenced by this inventive spot for Miller Genuine Draft in which a young man “peels away” all the problems in his life like labels on a beer bottle. But what about his drinking problem? Anyway, it certainly beats douchebaggy meatheads yelling, “wazzzuuuuuuup!”

While You Were Wishing Dreidels Were More Fun

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Best Night Ever: Thursday, December 14th

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It’s Best Night Ever for Thursday, December 14th! Dan Hopper is here to walk you through the best of Thursday night tv, including The Office, Grey’s Anatomy, The O.C., and Pee Wee’s Christmas Special!

…Of The Day

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  • RIP HIM A NEW ONE: Next time you’re in England, ixnay on the ack-The-Ripper-Jay jokes. Oliver Stone will tell you, it’s not a good idea. (Drudgereport)
  • REMEMBER ME?: Kato Kaelin thinks O.J. should of left the word “if” off his book “If I Did It.” Thanks Kato… you’re just 11 years too late. (TMZ)
  • NO MORE DIXING AROUND: The Dixie Chicks might be breaking up. Score another one for the Bush administration. (A Socialite’s Life)
  • ONE UP, ONE DOWN: Amy Poehler is getting her own Nickelodeon cartoon. And, today a topless Amy Poehler picture popped up on the web. What a day. (Egotastic)
  • HOLIDAY SALE: Who wouldn’t want a Nick La-Che T-shirt for Christmas? Well, besides Jessica. (BWE.TV Shop)