Best Night Ever: Tuesday, November 28th

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It’s Best Night Ever for Tuesday, November 28th! Mindy Raf is here to walk you through the best of Tuesday night tv, including Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, House, and My Boys!

You can check out more videos of Mindy HERE.

…Of The Day

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  • NOISY BOB: Clerks director Kevin Smith is apparently a little miffed that Apple wasn’t interested in running his rambling drivel hilarious insights on Anthrax and Sinead O’Connor for their “Celebrity Playlist” section. (Kevin Smith’s Diary)
  • BLACK POWER: Jesse Jackson is calling for a boycott against the latest Seinfeld DVDs, teaching that unemployed actor guy who played Elaine’s dumb boyfriend a really unfortunate lesson about racial sensitivity. (TV Squad)
  • LOST JUNKIE METHADONE FIX: This list of 50 Loose Ends From Lost doesn’t answer any questions and only makes you want to see the next episode even more. Just like the show! (IGN TV)
  • LIMBLAHBLAHBLAH: “Let’s Just Have The Civil Wars…Just Blow The Place Up”, Rush Limbaugh, on Iraq, right as always. (HuffPo)
  • AWESOME WEBSITE: Now when you’re going on a date with that fugly person you met on MySpace, you don’t have to count on your drunken roommate to bail you out with the mid-meal fake phone call. (Mobile Alibi)
  • HOLIDAY BARGAIN BLOW-OUT: Since your dad still loves those topical Brokeback Mountain jokes, get him one of the hilarious t-shirts from our online store for cheap! (BWE.tv Store)

What’s On Borat’s iPod Walkman?

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borat1.gifGosh, it’s been way too long since we’ve annoyed you by posting about Borat. Well, it’s time to fix that. Stereogum stumbled upon a list of our #1 Kazakh’s favorite tunes. Since we refuse to accept that the whole Borat thing is getting old, here are the first couple of songs on the list:

1. “Beat It” – Michael Jacksons
I a huge fanny of this new song by dancing negro, Michael Jacksons. We have many major exports in my country -first is potassium, second is apples and third is small boys to Michaels ranch. Why not? Is niiice!

2. “You Be My Wife” from Borat Musical Listenings….
This is romantic song that I wrote about a woman’s in my moviefilm, whom I wanted to make romance inside off. This feature Belinda Bedekovic, our famous keytar player and was produced by Korki Buchek!!!

The rest of the list is right here. It’s very… wait for it… what am I gonna say?… hold on… here it comes… NIIIICE! Get it? Niiiice! Ahhhh. Yeah.

Lindsay Lohan Just Another Dumb Girl Who Thinks Her Life Is Like Sex and the City

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SATC.jpgSex and the City Syndrome. Scary Sadshaws. Morons. Call them what you will, but you have undoubetdly noticed the phenomenon of women who seem think their lives are JUST LIKE those of the girls on Sex and the City. You know the type – always trying to figure out with their friends which of the four characters they most resemble (“Oh my god you’re totally Samantha you slut!”) If so, fear not, for you are not alone. In fact, the latest party-loving lass who’s blaming her bad behaviour on the poor examples set by the jet-setting Manhattan lifestyles of Carrie Bradshaw and Company is none other than Lindsay Lohan! Lindsay clearly gets her sassy fashion style from Carrie, her slutty man-eating from Samantha, her hot-but-annoyingness from Charlotte, and her firecrotch from Miranda.

WWJS: What Would Jay Say? The Answer!

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space2.JPGYesterday we tried to figure out which corny, lame, groan-worthy joke Tonight Show host Jay Leno would make regarding the Pamela Anderson / Kid Rock split. We came up with three options and you added a bunch too (our favorite: “It’s okay, though, Pam has already found another scummy man to fill the void in her life: Kevin Federline” from bestblogever). Well, we tuned in last night and sure enough, Jay delivered. Did he go with one of the cheesy ones we predicted (check them out here) or did he come up with his own? Click below to find out.

Thanks for playing! Another WWJS? is coming soon!

UNEMPLOYMENT CHECK: Penis Envy

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When you combine Tyra Banks with sexpert Sue Johansson, you’re guaranteed some hilarious stuff. We just feel bad for the guy in the green shirt. When people are talking about small penises on television, the last thing you want is for the camera to cut to you… 3 times. I wonder if they know something we don’t.

Poor guy. Poor, poor poorly endowed guy. That hurts.

Let’s Get In Touch With Reality, Shall We?

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daily douche-24-7.jpgWhat happens when a bunch of dudes who want to be famous stop being polite, and start acting like real douchebags, all while being followed around by MTV cameras? If you want to find out, be sure to tune into MTV on December 6th to check out Twentyfourseven, a new reality show that tells the story of 7 guys – Greg the “Entrepreneur”, Chris the “Rock Star”, Frankie the “Club Promoter”, Matt the “Actor”, and so on – as they all try to “make it big” in Hollywood by simply drinking energy drinks, having MySpace pages, rounding up “ladies”, making terrible music, wearing trucker hats, fighting, putting “positive vibes into their salads”, “poppin’ bottles”, and doing a whole buch of other sh*t that sums up why I never go to Los Angeles. So if you just don’t have enough deluded friends who want to be famous of your own, tune in each week to watch this “crew”, “livin’ it”, “twentyfourseven”. It’s the best Hollywood Morons Acting Like Jackasses show since Entourage, but not quite so “high-brow”. These guys, for obvious reasons, are today’s Daily Douches.

CAPTION THIS! Paris Shops In The Kids Section

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Sick of her chihuahua and monkey, Paris finally finds a pet she could see herself playing with for more than just a couple of weeks.

I don’t know– seeing Paris hold Sean Preston just doesn’t feel right. What do you think? Leave your Captions the Comments now!

A Little Afternoon Adorableness Break

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We are really loving the new Regina Spektor album Begin to Hope. Wondering whether to get it? Well, here’s a good test. Check out this video for one of our favorite tracks, “Fidelity”, and if you don’t feel completely adorable by the end or aren’t crying on the inside, it’s probably not the album for you.