We are total awards show whores. The Emmy Awards are no exception. There we were last night, bedecked in diamonds and swathed in tafetta, reclining on our beds, eating chicken wings while wearing elbow-length white gloves… it doesn’t get any better. While we found the Emmys to be a bit of a bore — who knew you could give 47 awards away to something as tiny as a mini-series — it still delivered some spectacular moments. Now, we would like to present The Evvy Awards: Best Week Ever’s favorite moments from last night’s Emmy Awards.
- Evvy for Best Opening Sequence: We loved last night’s opening montage, featuring Conan O’Brien spoofing nearly 37 of our favorite things, including South Park and Dateline‘s To Catch a Predator. In fact, we didn’t even tie in the similarities between the Lost plane crash footage to the Kentucky disaster that happened that morning, until Matt Drudge told us it was something we should care about. Look — no one seemed offended that Project Runway was nommed…
- Favorite Sutherland: TIE: Donald Sutherland and Keifer Sutherland.
- Least Favorite Sutherland: Half-sister Queefer Sutherland.
- Most in Need of a Face Shammy: Steve Carell. While Carell held it together in prime loser fashion during winner The Guy From Wings‘ speech — side note: WHAT THE EFF? — his sweet eyes and sly smile could not betray the 48 ounces of flop sweat beading down his brow/lip.
(pic via Defamer)
Emmy Fashion- if you’re an avid reader of US Weekly or if you’re Joan Rivers, you care deeply about what our favorite television starlets wear to the annual Emmy Awards ceremony. This year, low necklines (read: cleavage!) topped Emmy fashion, with everybody from Katherine Heigl to Tracey Gold (read: Tracey Gold!) busting out of their designer dresses. Some actresses gave us two new reasons to tune into their television show– Upgrade!– while others showed us a little more than we wanted to see– Downgrade!
So who’s an Upgrade and who’s a Downgrade? Vote now! And to see more great Emmy photos, head over to Egotastic for a massive picture post!
I’m sure you watched last night’s Emmy Awards because it is the most important that has ever happened in your lifetime, ever. But in case you missed it (shame on you), check out this intro sequence in which host Conan O’Brien hilariously stumbles his way through several of your favorite shows. Part I is posted below, and the rest can be found over at Double Viking.
Vinnie Chase Marky Mark tells an inspiring story of a man who must overcome some pretty incredible odds in order to convince people that they haven’t already seen this movie a bajillion times before – $17 million
2. It’s pretty safe to say that this movie’s continued success means we’re going to be hearing frat guys quote it incessantly until Will Ferrell finally comes up with a new character whose legend/ballad/tale needs to be told – $8 million
3. Can someone please explain to me how in the name of Xenu a legitimately good movie snuck its way into the top 5? How could American moviegoers have let this happen? – $7.5 million
4. Now this is the kind of comedy genius that we should be flocking to see, not that artsy-fartsy “Little Miss Feelings Movie” crap – $6.5 million
5. I bet if you watched this movie back-to-back with Beerfest and Talladega Nights, you’d be able to see what mild autism feels like – $6.5 million
When it happened, we really weren’t sure. We thought we saw Mindy Kaling‘s breast pop out of her dress during The Office‘s acceptance speech… we alerted friends of ours on the West Coast to see if censors caught wind of said Indian nip… we thought surely Drudge would have a nipple-siren ablaze within the hour… and yet, it seems we were the only ones to catch Kaling’s wardrobe malfunction. And now we would like to share it with you. Best Week Ever Presents: The Most Breast NBC Will Ever Allow On the Air (now with more slo-mo!). More Emmy coverage to follow today… but for now, enjoy.
It’s Best Night Ever for Sunday, August 27th! Michael is here to walk you through the best of Sunday night tv, including The Emmy Awards!
Leave it to Hollywood to turn our lazy summer days into one crazy-filled week. Here’s what happened:
- When Paramount decided to terminate its 14-year partnership with Tom Cruise, both parties started pointing fingers in the press, resulting in one very frightening memo to Tom from Viacom CEO Sumner Redstone.
- We discovered a site called 10,000 Reasons Civilization Is Doomed and had a good chuckle about it. But after also discovering Paris’ album, Dane Cook’s idea of comedy, a Lohan Family Circus comic, a Snakes on a Plane tattoo, and celebrity scales, we’re starting to worry that the site wasn’t a joke.
- After failing to impress even the most musical-taste-challenged teenyboppers at the Teen Choice Awards, K-Fed stops bragging about his MC skills and starts bragging about his GED skills.
- Team Firecrotch decided their battles would be better fought by moving Moron Headquarters from Hyde Nightclub directly to Paris Hilton’s house, where Brandon Davis also now resides.
- Seeing as neither could avoid the necessity of promoting themselves to their target demographic at the Teen Choice Awards, Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson’s inevitable crossing of paths turned out to be one really awkward encounter.
- Troubled pop princess Britney Spears has been making pretty premature plans for her own burial, saying she wants to be buried with her dog Lucky. As the average human lives upwards of 70 years and dogs only for about 10, this means she’s either planning to keep Lucky’s corpse on ice for six decades, or she’s really trying tell us something.
In the wake of Tom Cruise being firing by Paramount Pictures for his suddenly radical approach to public relations over the past year, and the fallout’s resulting ego battle with his old boss, the biology experts over at UsWeekly took a scientific approach to identifying the physical nature of his development from Hollywood Hunk to Crazy Eyes Cruise. Nature can be scary, kids – and if we’re not careful, the next time Cruise finds his way onto a plane, it might be a whole lot muthaf*ckin’ scarier than Maverick and Iceman’s forbidden love.
NBC’s The Office might be our favorite show on television. Perfectly cast, funny, real — hard to find reasons to hate it. Well, NBC may just have found one. Looks like they’re pushing the Pam and Jim romance hardcore. Don’t get us wrong, we love the two of them (John Krasinski, call us!), and obvs cried for days during the season finale (full disclosure: our great aunt died the same night… but still.) However, when NBC tries to shove their adorableness down our throats, like in the following promo, which utlizes the soundtrack from Saving Private Ryan‘s? Let’s just say Ross and Rachel are rolling over in their ruby-lined graves.
THE OFFICE – Pam & Jim Moments – video powered by Metacafe