Hey, What Kind of Movie Is This!?!

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The studio behind Employee of the Month took a pretty interesting approach to selling their movie to “the kids on the MySpace”, with the following ad currently appearing on the front page. I suspected this movie would be full of plastic sex objects who can’t act, but I didn’t realize it was actually hardcore porno…

UPDATE: My obvious (and rather poor) photoshopping of the first panel of the ad somehow made it appear that they were salaciously using sex to sell their movie, which they clearly would never think of doing. For clarity, the ad actually reads, “Dane Cook is HARD at work”, not “Dane Cook is HARD”. There’s a difference. Also, the Jessica Simpson part reads exactly as displayed.

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ICYMI: Norm MacDonald in “It’s Never Too Soon”

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There has been a lot of debate lately as to whether or not it’s too soon to make fun of the death of Steve Irwin. Well, those dying to crack a couple of stingray jokes at your office birthday parties should breathe a sigh of douche-lief, because Norm MacDonald has finally made Steve Irwin’s death humorous. So get out your arrow headbands and sharpen your pitchforks, cause you’ve got a boatload of material to catch up on.

While You Were Watching Zach Braff Mope

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  • Four undercover Martha Stewart operatives were exposed on – and immediately banished from – the set of Rachel Ray’s rival new cooking show. Now that these two homemakers have already hit the matresses for a full on gang war, how long before someone gets iced like a delicious ginger-apple tea?
  • After a public screaming/fortune-cookie-hurling match at her mother’s birthday dinner that climaxed with telling mommy to “go to hell”, Lindsay Lohan drank away her maternal misery at an NYC Fashion Week party, outside of which she fell down and broke her wrist. When released from the hospital, LiLo then mowed down a few Times Square tourists, started a forest fire in Central Park and flew her private jet into the Statue of Liberty. She’s sort of like the Paul Bunyan of partying.
  • Victoria Beckham bent it far enough for her nip to slip out. Very posh.
  • What better way to honor the memory of one’s tragically departed son than by squeezing a final couple hundred thousand bucks out of his lifeless corpse? This, and other helpful tips can be found in the “Anna Nicole Smith Guide to Living”.
  • Mel Gibson’s daughter married guitarist Kenny Wayne Shepherd on Saturday. Mazel Tov!

ICYMI: The White Stripes Play Springfield

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In what will surely go down in history as the greatest rock performance since Aerosmith played Moe’s Tavern, Jack and Meg White made a cameo in last night’s episode of The Simpsons. The appearance, which consisted of a high-speed drum chase (?) and a “Hardest Button To Button” parody proved that Bart Simpson and pals are still on the cutting edge. The cutting edge of 2003. Watch the fun little clip here.

Link via Product Shop NYC

Best of the Best Week Ever: Liars and Tyras and Vag, Oh My!

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Borat.JPGTonight is the season premiere of Best Week Ever — so make sure to tune in at 11 pm and the rest of the weekend for your fix. Regarding your alcohol fix: The theme for the show’s “Drinking Game” this week is… “game shows.” So take a sip any and every time a reference to game shows is made!

LISTEN UP: The President’s Dead

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  • YANP gives us the state of the union on a new track from Okkervil River called “The President’s Dead”, which must be in reference to Bush’s typical lack of charisma or intelligence during this morning’s press conference.
  • *SIXEYES and I are both digging this Richard Buckner character, even if he shares a name with this kid who used to beat me up by the tetherball pole in junior high.
  • Said the Gramophone raises the Awesome Alert to “red” for Arab Strap, posting three of their tracks.
  • Elliott Smith is the Tupac of wispy emo folk music in that he’s recording more in the afterlife than he did when he was still around. The Rawking Refuses to Stop has four new tracks.
  • Fluxblog has the latest queeny 70′s rock from The Scissor Sisters.

We Swear*, Last Project Runway Post Today…

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Some genius transcribed each of the opening speeches given by the designers from this morning’s Project Runway Season 3 runway show at Olympus Fashion Week, and then set the entire collections to music (we think) from the American Idol Soundtrack. (We said genius.) It really helps understanding each collection, and makes you feel like you’re there, listening to one of the worst CD’s you own. We’ll kick it off with Laura‘s, because it incorporates one of our favorite Kelly Clarkson covers, but you can catch the other three videos after the jump. (*Our fingers are crossed.)

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SIZZLER: Major, Major, Possible Project Runway Spoiler

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PROJRUNWAYLOGO1.JPGIs your heart beating fast? Good. Because we just caught wind of the FINAL THREE CONTESTANTS left on Project Runway! This morning, we saw all four of the Olympus Fashion Week collections, and now, we know which one won’t end up mattering. But we’re not cruel people. We wouldn’t go ahead and spoil the next episode unless we had your express permission. So, on that note:

By clicking on the following link, you agree NOT to get worked up and angry that we ruined some of the mystery surrounding the Project Runway finale… And if you choose not to click, you must be some sort of Jedi, because we really couldn’t help ourselves.

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Shuffling Towards the Weekend!

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It’s Friday afternoon and another couple days of drowning our celebrity-induced pain in booze is just around the corner, which means it’s time for another edition of our beloved Friday feature, Shuffling Towards the Weekend! As usual, our special guest has shuffled their iPod and will share the first five resulting songs – being completely honest – so what we might judge their sonicshuffle.jpg worthiness. This week we’re joined by our good buddy Nate, who is the proprietor of the popular comedy blog The Apiary. We hung out with him last night at some splashy comedy club’s “grand opening gala” (where, by the way, we learned first-hand that Kathy Griffin is somehow even scarier-looking in person than she is on TV), and thought he’d be just the type of sucker whose musical tastes would be easily made fun of. Examine and judge his resulting songs, then post your own in the comments!

“Tinfoil”, Rainer Maria
“Pink Chimneys”, Promise Ring
“What Whorse You Wrote Id on”, Owls
“I’m Content With Losing”, UnderOath
“Another the Letter”, Wire