It’s August 4th; What’s up?

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talladega nights POSTER.jpgWill Ferrell is a genius. I don’t think you can debate that. If you head over to Cracked’s list of the 10 Best Will Ferrell Skits of All Time and somehow manage to watch them all without laughing, I don’t want to know you. Just go away.

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby comes out tonight, and it’s guaranteed to be great because it’s a Will Ferrell movie. Remember, there’s a difference between Will Ferrell movies and movies Will Ferrell does. Old School was a Will Ferrell movie, Bewitched was not. Anchorman was a Will Ferrell movie, Melinda & Melinda was not. See what I mean? Talladega Nights is totally a Will Ferrell movie and that’s why it’s going to be incredible (and even if it isn’t, everybody you know will start quoting it anyway).

So what are YOU going to see this weekend? Vote NOW!

ICYMI: How Rude! Stephanie Tanner Wants You To Get Naked

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Proving that Bob Saget isn’t the only Full House alum with a dirty mind, Jodie Sweetin recently took over as the host of Fuse’s Pants Off Dance Off. The folks at America’s (what… 3rd? maybe 4th?) favorite music channel have already decided to use Jodie to promote other Fuse shows, like The P.A. If you’ve ever wondered what it was like to have Stephanie Tanner ask you to remove your clothes, watch this clip. Come on, be honest, you know you have.

Link via Celebutaint

The Three Stages of Suri Cruise

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Penelope Cruz has added her name to the list of celebrities who have seen the elusive Suri Cruise in the flesh. Or in the whatever-her-alien-body is-made-of. Penelope, The Queen of Queens Leah Remini, and the other Smith, Jada Pinkett are the only three people in Hollywood who claim to have seen the mystery baby. Just in case you happen to be the next person to see Suri, we here at BWE have put together this handy pictorial to illustrate the three stages of seeing Suri Cruise.
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So be careful, people. See Suri at your own risk.

While You Were Bathing Yourself In Frozen Yogurt…

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Best Night Ever: Thursday, August 3rd

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It’s Best Night Ever for Thursday, August 3rd! Dan Hopper is here to walk you through the best of Thursday night tv, including Shark Attack: Rebellion, America’s Got Talent, and Shark Attack: Survivor!

…OF THE DAY

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  • CAN’T-MISS CLIP: BWE and The Office‘s Guide To What Is Safe and Not Safe At Work. (BWE)
  • SUFFOCATED SWEETHEART: Nick Lachey told girlfriend Vannessa Mannillo that his goal to get remarried means that she had better be serious about their relationship and, most importantly, getting Newlyweds 2: For Real This Time a place in E!’s 2007 reality programming schedule. (The Bosh)
  • CAST-OFF WISDOM: Jamie Foxx says that the part of the new James Bond should have gone to P. Diddy instead of Daniel Craig. But then again, a guy can say a lot of crazy things when he’s been binging on Cristal and blowing lines off naked Laker Girls on his aspiring actor buddy’s yacht for three days straight. (IDLYITW)
  • SEE-THROUGH SIMPSON #1: The hard-hitting investigative reporters over at Marie Claire had to dig a little deeper to make the startling discovery that Ashlee Simpson may not be completely authentic, and is possibly using the press for selfish purposes as opposed to an open forum in which she can fearlessly share her real feelings, fears and frustrations. (Junkiness)
  • SEE-THROUGH SIMPSON #2: Possibly trying to support her sister’s credibility, Jessica Simpson uses her unsupported breasts and a revealing dress to hypnotize us into forgetting about Ashlee, forgetting about her lies, forgetting…very…sleepy. (Hot Online News)

LISTEN UP: A Daily Dose of the Best Music Ever

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  • After discovering that Damien Jurado has a blog on which he occasionally posts demo tracks, Said the Gramophone downloaded and posted one of them for so you can listen to it without having to sift through some sensitive musician type’s online diary.
  • Bows + Arrows discovers that Matthew Friedberger has a cool new solo record that might just be good enough to beat the heat surrounding his other band, The Fiery Furnaces.
  • KCRW’s live studio performances are awesome. Broken Social Scene is awesome. Surviving the Golden Age has KCRW’s live studio performance by Broken Social Scene. If you like stuff that is awesome, there’s really only one logical thing to do.
  • GvB doesn’t tell us what Cansei De Ser Sexy means, but if I had to guess it’s probably how you say “nonsense punk band in ironic 80′s clothes that are really sweaty” in some secret hipster language only spoken by American Apparel models and Pitchfork writers.
  • MOKB seems to these tracks from The Changes might change your life for be for the better, but probably not as much as The Shins did.

BWE EXCLUSIVE: Snakes On A Photoshoot

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We here at BWE got our hands on some exclusive footage of Samuel L. Jackson’s recent EW photoshoot for Snakes On A Plane. The audio sucks and the video is nothing special, but you know what… there are SNAKES on a PLANE. What more do you need?

Time Trumpet Plays Taps for Tony Blair

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1.jpgTime Trumpet, a new show on the BBC, is a fake news program set in the future which “looks back” on hypothetical “newsworthy events”. Picture watching Dateline tonight, only the episode time-travelled from 2031, and was taped in a world where where terrorism and suicide bombings are par for the course. The result? A really disturbing television show, featuring computer-generated footage of an airplane flying into Big Ben and a post-assasination Tony Blair. One segment even features “The Terrorism Awards” (please, God, let Star Jones work that red carpet.) The show is causing multiple-conniptions across England, with many urging folks to write to the BBC and demand the show be removed from the airwaves. It’s hard to make the final call — the images are truly disturbing — but then again seeing Tom Cruise as a small old man in a vest has kind of made the afternoon for us. Decide for yourself.