Bored at work? Hungover? Sick and tired of checking your MySpace profile over and over and over again? Looking for something to do?
Hey, me too!
If you need something to pass the time, head over to Sony’s Monster House site. They have a couple of games up that should keep you busy for a little while. I recommend the Mega Sweet Arcade Game because it’s just that: Mega Sweet.
And hey; it sure beats doing work.
Working in Hollywood is a lot like working on a farm in that nobody can keep their hands clean forever. Celebrity and scandal go hand in hand, and like a loss of virginity (sometimes less metaphorically than others), you never forget your very first time. Despite getting a little dirt on them, some celebs seem like they’ll manage to come out of their first scandals clean as a whistle (UPGRADE), while others you just know will end up dirtier than Brandon Davis’ mouth (DOWNGRADE). Tell us which of these stained stars will continue to shine, and which ones are going to burn out before we know it.
The reviews of Lady in the Water are in, and they are not good. So instead of spending $10 to sit through 2 hours of evangelical mumbo-jumbo, check out this hilarious and yet terrifying short video called “The Life and Death of a Pumpkin,” and spend the remaining hour and fifty-five minutes organizing an angry letter-writing campaign to M. Night Shame-he’s-lame.
Check out this picture taken of Ashlee Simpson in New York City yesterday. Something about it is kind of confusing. Let’s begin with her face. She looks good following her nose job and possible lip plumping, you have to admit that. Good tan, standard issue 45-pound sunglasses, fake hair likely ripped from the hands of cancer patients. What’s confusing is her t-shirt. Ashlee apparently never got the memo that girls just don’t do… scat — I mean that, sorry… “that”. Why spend thousands on a face transplant if you’re just going to have people picture it all squinched up on a toilet somewhere? You wouldn’t wear a shirt that said “I’m So Happy I Could Just Skin A Baby”, would you? We imagine Jessica Simpson is looking very upset right now — assuming she still has the ability to make facial expressions.
It’s Best Night Ever for Thursday, July 20th! Brian Faas is here to walk you through the best of Thursday night tv, including Master of Champions, America’s Got Talent, and So You Think You Can Dance?!
It rarely happens, but when it does, it’ll knock the wind outta ya. I refer, of course, to celebrity aging. Take, for example, Ethan Embry. When I think of Ethan Embry, I think of the adorable teen heartthrob from Dutch, Empire Records, and the most underrated movie of our time, Can’t Hardly Wait. So when I read the Go Fug Yourself headline “Celebrity Giamatti Watch: Ethan Embry“, I didn’t quite catch their meaning. Ethan Embry… Paul Giamatti… two of the finest actors of our time, sure… but that’s about the only comparison I could think of. It’s been years since I’ve seen Embry, but come on — how bad can a handful of years age you?
Well. Prepare to yell out a resounding OMG (as I did), and take a look at this current picture of dear, sweet, adorable Ethan. Don’t get me wrong, I’d still marry him… but I’d totally have upper hand.
A small independent production company has Hollywood producers up in arms over their decision to release a straight-to-video film entitled Snakes on a Train, in a clearly calculated attempt to cash in on the hysteria surrounding blog-annointed cult-film-to-be Snakes on a Plane. While the move isn’t particularly surprising, it is interesting to ponder the philosophical puzzle this future bargain bin video presents: could people be as ironically influenced by a schlocky fright film that takes place not in high altitudes, but in the relative safety of train tracks? Should we find this premise even funnier, or more ridiculous, or both – and most importantly, do we love it? Granted, we were one of the first blogs to slither onto the Snakes on a Plane bandwagon, but this is all starting to get seriously confusing.