The following things should all make your Tivo’s shift a little in their tiny pants:
- K-Fed will be making his small screen acting debut! Federline will be playing completely against his stereotype (read: foppish dandy), instead portraying a thug who “hassles” people on “CSI.” We’re air quoting that last one as we assume it’s not the hit drama Crime Scene Investigation, but rather hit cable access show Crunk Stamina Index.
- Fans of people with big heads and famous parents, rejoice!
- Leslie Nielsen is returning to TV! He’s signed on for NBC’s highly anticipated* upcoming comedy Lipshitz Saves the World. *We may be the only ones to care, but we care deeply.
- In other TV news, reanimated corpses — we mean Posh Spice — will also get her own TV show, this time handing out fashion advice to unkempt Americans. The name of the show? How to Stop Eating and Get Raped in 10 Days.
- MTV’s Video Music Awards will be handing out an award to the Best Cell Phone Ring. We’re placing all our money on Beethoven‘s Symphony No. 5 as the clear winner… What was that? Oh… Fergie is nominated too? Oh. Sorry Beethoven. Maybe next year.
After goading fallen starlet Tara Reid into delivering an impromptu oration of drunken self-destruction last Thursday night, the intrepid celeb hunters over at TMZ used Tara’s rejection from A-list heavens of Hyde, and ex-BFF Paris Hilton’s painfully simultaneous entrance past the same velvet rope, as inspiration to create a little One Act tabloid morality play, telling a tragic tale about the fickle nature of friendship in Tinseltown.
If you missed last night’s Emmy telecast, fear not. We know what you’re most interested in seeing: Emmys pre-pube years, i.e. The Most Awkward Moments. The funny thing is? We thought it would be funny to string all the uncomfortable moments together… but strangely enough… it just gets MORE awkward. ps. If Clarabell Clown was in your nightmares last night (as he was in ours), best to skip the following montage. pps. If you’re wondering where Bradley Whitford‘s little moment with Matthew Perry is… it was literally too long and we had to cut it. But trust, it was bad.
Seeing LOST so ridiculously snubbed from the Emmys last night, I was reminded of how stoked I am for the show to make it’s return to my TiVo this October. But as I barely have enough time to watch my favorite TV shows on TV, I certainly don’t have the time to keep up with them online in things like “The Lost Experience”, the show’s summer-long corresponding web game whose players are privy to secrets and hints the rest of us are not. Luckily, our friends over at TV Squad have pointed us to this video reel, comprised of over 50 clips from the HansoExposed website, which were previously only available seperately, to help tide you over until the Fall.
This cartoon mash-up by GringoJ has got to be the best thing I’ve seen all day. Because not only is the animation cool and the dialogue funny, it involves He-Man, Lion-O, Cheetarah, Teelah, Orco, Snarf, roofies, oral sex and venereal disease. It’s like your childhood and college experience all at once! Check it out now.
Thanks to drzwingle for dropping this. Got something you want to pass along? Drop it now!
We are total awards show whores. The Emmy Awards are no exception. There we were last night, bedecked in diamonds and swathed in tafetta, reclining on our beds, eating chicken wings while wearing elbow-length white gloves… it doesn’t get any better. While we found the Emmys to be a bit of a bore — who knew you could give 47 awards away to something as tiny as a mini-series — it still delivered some spectacular moments. Now, we would like to present The Evvy Awards: Best Week Ever’s favorite moments from last night’s Emmy Awards.
- Evvy for Best Opening Sequence: We loved last night’s opening montage, featuring Conan O’Brien spoofing nearly 37 of our favorite things, including South Park and Dateline‘s To Catch a Predator. In fact, we didn’t even tie in the similarities between the Lost plane crash footage to the Kentucky disaster that happened that morning, until Matt Drudge told us it was something we should care about. Look — no one seemed offended that Project Runway was nommed…
- Favorite Sutherland: TIE: Donald Sutherland and Keifer Sutherland.
- Least Favorite Sutherland: Half-sister Queefer Sutherland.
- Most in Need of a Face Shammy: Steve Carell. While Carell held it together in prime loser fashion during winner The Guy From Wings‘ speech — side note: WHAT THE EFF? — his sweet eyes and sly smile could not betray the 48 ounces of flop sweat beading down his brow/lip.
(pic via Defamer)
Emmy Fashion- if you’re an avid reader of US Weekly or if you’re Joan Rivers, you care deeply about what our favorite television starlets wear to the annual Emmy Awards ceremony. This year, low necklines (read: cleavage!) topped Emmy fashion, with everybody from Katherine Heigl to Tracey Gold (read: Tracey Gold!) busting out of their designer dresses. Some actresses gave us two new reasons to tune into their television show– Upgrade!– while others showed us a little more than we wanted to see– Downgrade!
So who’s an Upgrade and who’s a Downgrade? Vote now! And to see more great Emmy photos, head over to Egotastic for a massive picture post!
I’m sure you watched last night’s Emmy Awards because it is the most important that has ever happened in your lifetime, ever. But in case you missed it (shame on you), check out this intro sequence in which host Conan O’Brien hilariously stumbles his way through several of your favorite shows. Part I is posted below, and the rest can be found over at Double Viking.
Vinnie Chase Marky Mark tells an inspiring story of a man who must overcome some pretty incredible odds in order to convince people that they haven’t already seen this movie a bajillion times before – $17 million
2. It’s pretty safe to say that this movie’s continued success means we’re going to be hearing frat guys quote it incessantly until Will Ferrell finally comes up with a new character whose legend/ballad/tale needs to be told – $8 million
3. Can someone please explain to me how in the name of Xenu a legitimately good movie snuck its way into the top 5? How could American moviegoers have let this happen? – $7.5 million
4. Now this is the kind of comedy genius that we should be flocking to see, not that artsy-fartsy “Little Miss Feelings Movie” crap – $6.5 million
5. I bet if you watched this movie back-to-back with Beerfest and Talladega Nights, you’d be able to see what mild autism feels like – $6.5 million